I really, really dislike Gregg Wallace of Masterchef.
A lot.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 5 Nov 2010, 16:25, 1 reply, 15 years ago)

christ
please please don't talk about food, TMI coming right up, but i just threw up my lunch and then about 20 mins later my diet coke. and now am a bit cold and shivery... i can't cancel the PT as i stood her up last week, and i can't not go to the army wedding tomorrow, DO SOMETHING please!!!!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 5 Nov 2010, 16:33, Reply)

You've got the JeffAIDS
I suggest rest, drugs and no alcohol.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 5 Nov 2010, 16:34, Reply)

i can't!!!
i have to walk home tonight and then the gym and then the wedding. these things are Not Optional.

what drugs will get me through without yakking on my PT and/or an army officer, please dr jeff?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 5 Nov 2010, 16:36, Reply)

This is what happens when you don't eat meat.

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Fri 5 Nov 2010, 16:37, Reply)

oh no
i'm as healthy as a horse normally!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 5 Nov 2010, 16:38, Reply)

I'd sack of the PT - if you're ill the worse thing you can do is exercise.
Also, get a cab home - don't go out in this weather.

Then, get your duvet and take it to the sofa. From there, eat and drink bland stuff.

Take paracetamol and nurofen.

And get as much sleep as you can. If you've got a 5am start, then get sure you get yourself to bed by half-nine this evening.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 5 Nov 2010, 16:38, Reply)

i don't have a headache or anything, so it's prob just a quick bug
just stomach cramps and vomiting. i HATE being ill, i really hate it.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 5 Nov 2010, 16:39, Reply)

Well take the pills anyway.
They won't do you any harm.

Is it all food you can't keep down or just some?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 5 Nov 2010, 16:40, Reply)

everything.
i am feeling worse by the second, have now taken your advice and texted personal trainer.

FFS.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 5 Nov 2010, 16:44, Reply)

Go home immediately.
In a cab.

Get some digestives (bland and sugary) and REST. You need to get this sorted out if you want to go to this wedding tomorrow.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 5 Nov 2010, 16:46, Reply)

What will actually happen is this:
She will work until midnight tonight and either a) go to the wedding, have a thoroughly miserable time and try to work through Sunday, complaining to the internet about it the entire time or b) miss out on the wedding and try to work through Sunday, complaining to the internet the entire time.

I shall hold off claiming my five pounds until Sunday, but you'd best put it to one side for me.
( Kroney, Fri 5 Nov 2010, 16:58, Reply)

Oh dear
There may be no army surplus for you!!
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Fri 5 Nov 2010, 16:59, Reply)

I really hope you haven't got what I (and 3/4 of my staff) had.
If so, bed for you - no partying, total rest for at least 2-3 days.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 5 Nov 2010, 16:37, Reply)

oh no oh no
so do i.

on the bright side, 3 days of vomiting = instant weight loss.

on the down side....... it hurts!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 5 Nov 2010, 16:39, Reply)

partying anal
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Fri 5 Nov 2010, 16:40, Reply)

no anal anyway
off limits!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 5 Nov 2010, 16:44, Reply)

I'm glad I'm not the only one who thinks this.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Fri 5 Nov 2010, 16:47, Reply)

Come now, who do you think you're fooling here?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 5 Nov 2010, 17:09, Reply)

I'm sre there are people who don't realise the joke.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Fri 5 Nov 2010, 17:13, Reply)

Joke?
I'm not with you, sorry.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 5 Nov 2010, 17:14, Reply)

I'm confused
does she do anal or not? Actually, it makes no difference to me except to snigger and say "bums!"
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 5 Nov 2010, 17:20, Reply)

No, no I don't.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Fri 5 Nov 2010, 17:24, Reply)

OK, is that a joke?

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Fri 5 Nov 2010, 17:29, Reply)

Yep, she's a right cocoa-shunter - I should know.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 5 Nov 2010, 17:30, Reply)

OH GOD.
Basically. I said about 6 months ago I had three things I'd never do; Smack, crack, and anal. About 2 months ago Amberl says something about me being an anal pornstar, as a joke, or something. Al has picked it up and run like a motherfucker. And now Noel makes me badges proclaiming this fact and Monty buggers me every other Sunday.

EDIT: Sorry Al. Though you have been a great supporter of this meme, it was Vipros and Labs that started it.
b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post863805
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Fri 5 Nov 2010, 17:31, Reply)