I learnt today that;
1) Grammar schools still exist
2) Going to one doesn't make you posh
3) Audi TTs are quite a comfortable ride
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:01, 1 reply, 15 years ago)

i nearly bought a TT instead of my merc
but i wanted a convertible and i wanted a hard top.

i also really liked the A3 rag-top, audis are lovely.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:13, Reply)

Hot bloke has one of those
mmmm...convertible with leather interior.

EDIT - might be an A5 actually, I'm not sure. Either way...it's shamefully sexy.
(berk, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:18, Reply)

If he's a bloke and driving an A3 droptop
he's gay. So I hope for your sake it's an A4 or an A5.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:30, Reply)

Well, at least if he's gay
I know why he won't sleep with me! I think it is an A5 though.
(berk, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:32, Reply)

I'll be honest
most Audi convertibles have a whiff of lavender about them.

I'll be charitable and say he obviously isn't really interested in cars. But as a warning, Audi convertibles is sailing dangerously close to image-obsessed narcissm that rswipe's weekend arse seemed to suffer from.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:35, Reply)

god don't remind me
he emailed me again this morning with some gym-sex related punnage.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:42, Reply)

Have you emailed him back, going
'you're married, you wanker, now stop bothering me or I'll tell your wife'?
(berk, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:47, Reply)

i deleted him from fb
what more hint does he need?!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:52, Reply)

Another, bigger hint, apparently
if he's still emailing you in a sexy way.
(berk, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:53, Reply)

A good solid hoof in the pods usually does it.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:55, Reply)

he WAS mighty fit though
i blame my shiny slutty boots, i can't think why else he'd be persisting.

OH GOD, unless he sees me as a target for his personal training skills. why didn't i think of this horrifying possibility before??
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:57, Reply)

In which case the retort is obvious:
"Are you saying I look like I could do with some exercise?"
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:59, Reply)

You think he sees you as a project?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:59, Reply)

this possibility has only just struck me!

( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 16:01, Reply)

I suspect he just wants to get in your pants.
this seems the more likely outcome.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 16:00, Reply)

he started off by going on about meeting up
and i said something sarky about a workout and he took me literally and said something about not wanting to mess with my curves, or only outside the gym anyway. this was clear enough, so i ignored it.

but now he is still going on about working out my curves, so i am beginning to get a bit paranoid!!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 16:03, Reply)

If you polish them up to a mirror finish
then you only have yourself to blame for attracting narcissists.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 16:02, Reply)

i had not thought of this
damn
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 16:04, Reply)

Brilliant
Girl complains about men pretending she doesn't exist. Girl tries to get rid of bloke by pretending he doesn't exist.
( Kroney, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 16:02, Reply)

with the difference
that he was a married prick trying to get some on the side
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 16:03, Reply)

Doesn't matter
if she doesn't tell him to fuck off, the big married twat, she shouldn't be surprised if he persists. Especially since she's already said he's dim.
( Kroney, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 16:05, Reply)

^ this ^
and also not v bright, can't spell for shit etc etc.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 16:06, Reply)

Oh, I'm already aware that he's probably trouble
but the thing is, the trouble comes in such an attractive package...
(berk, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:43, Reply)

Seriously?
Come on, even those novelty "fundoms" don't look attractive.
(LongJohnBaldry, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:55, Reply)

audis are universally owned by arses, though.
I'd have been even more abusive to you if you'd got a TT than I am about the SLK. Clitoris of the car world, the TT.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:20, Reply)

Audi TT driving arseholes
are a lot easier to find, though...
(berk, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:21, Reply)

what, as in, by looking for a TT?

Edit, Oh, fucking d'oh. just got your comment. Very good ;)
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:23, Reply)

You're so lucky I don't have my audi anymore
or I'd kick ya. Kick ya real good (do do do do dodododododo)
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 16:07, Reply)

A client gave me a lift this morning
Black leather trim inside. Very comfortable. A mate of mine has a BMW Z4 and I find it so uncomfortable.

Of course nothing compares to my 1998 Ford Mondeo, the gaffer tape on the bumper really sets it off...
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:21, Reply)

because the Z4 is on runflats
BMW put them as standard. It's like filling the shocks with cement. Awful ride.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:24, Reply)

I prefer the shape of the Z3 anyway

( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:25, Reply)

i hate BMW's though
hate them. every time you have a dick up your arse on the motorway it's a beemer.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:26, Reply)

True

( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:28, Reply)

it's Audis now.
As soon as the aspiring wankers found out that 3 series Beemers are more common than Ford Mondeos now, they all went for Audi.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:28, Reply)

both
salesmen mostly
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:29, Reply)

n beemer accident waiting to happen
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:29, Reply)

There's only been one really good 2 seater drop top sports car in the last 10 years anyway.
Honda S2000.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:28, Reply)

My car has lichen growing on it. This proves 2 things...
1) I live in an area with clean air.
2) I'm one lazy mo'fo' when it comes to washing my car.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:31, Reply)

My car is a Skoda
that proves one of two things:
1) I've grown out of owning hideously expensive fast sports cars or classic cars
2) I'm pretending to have grown out of owning hideously expensive fast sports cars or classic cars for the foreseeable future to finance other things

Take a wild shot in the dark.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:33, Reply)

It's '2' isn't it?
you want that expensive sleek head-turner sooooo bad...and it can be all YOURS* if you sign this finance agreement.

*Car remains property of colonel dracula enterprises, typical APR 37%, your house may be at risk if you fail to make the crippling payments. Your statutory rights are not affected. Ha ha, just kidding, you signed away all your rights.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:37, Reply)

You are Jim Davidson and you owe me a fiver.
Didn't he advertise expensive car loans? Because of course, of all the people if the world you'd trust to help you with such a purchase is a racist drunk with wife beating skillz
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:39, Reply)

No idea, is he still alive?

( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:42, Reply)

Well I haven't been invited to a street party yet to mark the occasion, so I assume so.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:44, Reply)

I'd spent 5 years working on the MG in my profile
It hurt a lot to sell it. But, yeah, mostly I want what you're selling, baby.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:44, Reply)

Tsk. Aren't accountants meant to be well off and stuff?
Even my 2000 ford fiesta (also with gaffer tape on the bumper) is better than that, and I'm an impoverished scientist.
(berk, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:24, Reply)

they are well off
because they spend their money wisely and not on £580 a month for a car loan!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:26, Reply)

I'm not a very good accountant
also, it pays to have a crapper car than your clients.

(But mostly it all goes on the house)
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:26, Reply)

Sensible, I guess
You can't really live in your car...
(berk, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:30, Reply)

you can pose in it
and get a LOT of attention cruising around london with no top though (the car, not you).

note that i never do this, as it ruins my hair. so why i wanted a convertible so badly remains a bit of a mystery.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:32, Reply)

Certainly not
where would I make stool?
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 23 Nov 2010, 15:32, Reply)