Elephant circumciser
the pay is terrible but the tips are ENORMOUS!
(nimrodihnio making gravy for one., Tue 1 Jun 2010, 21:08, Reply)

Assistant circumciser
They don't get paid much.

But they do get to keep the tips.


Length?

Always shorter than it was to start with.
(Pill Popper Thank you Sasha Shulgin, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 20:26, 3 replies)

I'm an ad man
ad man baby, be ready for the booty love
lube you up with pavlov spittle and drop bollocks from above, yeah,
i'm an ad man, baby, let me set your scene
what we see in it for you, can not be unseen
ad man, ad man, we tear you a new third eye
that you can't close or open, and will never cry
uhh, ad man, attencion deficit porn
when we kill your ego dead, the best clients are born
--

You have to know the system to break it? Shit doesn't break, except maybe when it's really cold, and the smug wieners just glow with self recognition.

(such was my B3TA cherry poppings)
(funktrash soul = combustion engine, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 19:57, 2 replies)

Israeli Spokesmen/women
They lie so much their nose's get bigger and bigger
( The Scrunt Wants a Dozen Pints, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 19:32, 11 replies)

Big Titted Historians
piss me right off. Take my money and get someone else to spunk it over their nice huge firm tits. Bastards the lot of them. Yes.
( The_Commander_of_Skips wears his sunglasses at night, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 19:12, Reply)

TV Salesmen
I went into Curry's the other day, and the bloke would not stop trying to flog me a 3D TV.

I only went in for a 9v battery.

However, I have to admit it, it did look real. Liverpool were playing a friendly.

I went to pay and my wallet was missing.



...ok, ok. it was shite, but something has to stem the torrent of puns.
(dchurch bah, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 18:51, 1 reply)

pedicurists
Bunch of pedi-files
(CactusZack Shaved his coin purse on, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 18:33, Reply)

French chefs with 4 restaurants
everything but the kitchen cinq
(nimrodihnio making gravy for one., Tue 1 Jun 2010, 18:09, 5 replies)

water carriers
as a trend, I want to bucket
(nimrodihnio making gravy for one., Tue 1 Jun 2010, 18:08, Reply)

Irish chefs.
They're just stew-pid
(TheColonel, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 18:06, Reply)

italian chefs
gonna give them a pizza my mind
(nimrodihnio making gravy for one., Tue 1 Jun 2010, 18:05, Reply)

Japanese chefs.
Fuck off back Hom
(TheColonel, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 17:55, 2 replies)

The short-sighted circumciser
He narrowly avoids getting the sack...
(CH88, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 17:28, 1 reply)

science teachers
Fuck off back ohm
(nimrodihnio making gravy for one., Tue 1 Jun 2010, 17:26, Reply)

Jesus......
Stop it.

Deli Workers - the just can't cut the mustard
Coblers - they just don't fit in
Aerobics Instructors - not fit for the job
Quick Fit Fitters - they just Exhaust me.

That should cut a few down.

Now...stop it.

Please!
(dchurch bah, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 17:23, Reply)

Science teachers
not really bright enough to think of anything for themselves
(nimrodihnio making gravy for one., Tue 1 Jun 2010, 17:21, Reply)

hotel receptionists
I have my reservations
(nimrodihnio making gravy for one., Tue 1 Jun 2010, 17:18, Reply)

Podiatrists
they are my arch enemies
(nimrodihnio making gravy for one., Tue 1 Jun 2010, 17:14, Reply)

Cunts who don't work hard enough...
...and spend all their worktime filling up QOTW with these shitty puns. Fuck off, the lot of you.
( ousgg is not seeking approval, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 17:13, 3 replies)

venetian blind makers
shady business
(nimrodihnio making gravy for one., Tue 1 Jun 2010, 17:11, Reply)

People that combine dentistry with tailoring
all mouth and trousers.
(Che Grimsdale Best before:, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 17:07, 1 reply)

Human cannonballs
Should be fired, the lot of them.








Just can't find people of the right calibre these days.
(Che Grimsdale Best before:, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 17:01, 1 reply)

Historians
They have no future
(Corbo, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 16:48, Reply)

Mathematicians
I just can't work them out.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 16:42, Reply)

Dead lawyers
they lie still
(nimrodihnio making gravy for one., Tue 1 Jun 2010, 16:36, Reply)

Footballers
Always kicking off
(Corbo, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 16:32, Reply)

all clowns should be sacked immediately!
but they would probably claim funfair dismissal
(nimrodihnio making gravy for one., Tue 1 Jun 2010, 16:27, Reply)

Buttplug manufacturers.
Stuck-up arseholes.
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 16:24, Reply)

car mechanics
always trying to start something
(nimrodihnio making gravy for one., Tue 1 Jun 2010, 16:11, Reply)

Puns on bankers?
lost interest...
(nimrodihnio making gravy for one., Tue 1 Jun 2010, 15:59, Reply)