Don't let the girlfriend move in.
I now have to buy this stuff called toilet paper.
I kid you not, i never really had to buy the stuff before. With taking most dumps at work, a roll would literally last months. A 6 pack.. a year!

Now its a 6 pack a month :(
Thats a lot of money going down the bog thats for sure.
(Boom- Clicks on NSFW links at work., Fri 11 Nov 2011, 12:36, 11 replies)

It's true
The misses just doesn't understand the pleasure obtained from having a dump at work. All it takes is a bit of bowel training.
(BiggestNizzy your company name here pm for rates., Fri 11 Nov 2011, 12:45, closed)

And you get paid for it too!
( Draconacticus Reject shampoo. Demand real poo!, Fri 11 Nov 2011, 13:10, closed)

you are wonderful men for using the toilet at work! On behalf of American women, thank you! Well done!

( ezero www.elizabethzero.com, Fri 11 Nov 2011, 17:06, closed)

twice the wiping, innit?
Girls don't really subscribe to the idea of 'shake out the last few drops' like us gents do. Or bang it against the side of the urinal if you're a Geordie.
( Rotating Wobbly Hat That's not a banana. THIS is a banana., Fri 11 Nov 2011, 13:18, closed)

Then again,
"shaking out the last few drops" for the ladies would probably involve advanced samba skills.
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 11 Nov 2011, 13:38, closed)

I don't think
that it's just about 'twice the wiping'. A few drips from the front can hardly justify using quarter of a bog roll at a time. I don't know why they use so much. Maybe they just don't like to feel their warms bits, so insulate their hands from the onerous task by using half a rain forest at a sitting? Whatever the reason, I have to bulk buy from Costco and my GF only stays 4 nights a week.
(ianisme, Mon 14 Nov 2011, 3:28, closed)

You could recycle.
Instead of flushing it down the bog after you've used it, put it in a box, then use it to blow your nose, clean glasses etc.
(username failed moderation, Fri 11 Nov 2011, 13:49, closed)

remember,
always use both sides of a piece of paper.
( Batsgirl, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 21:50, closed)

"Doing a boxer"
Wrapping a hand with bog roll like a boxer's bandages for each wipe.
(ThatNiceMan thought he was being funny, Fri 11 Nov 2011, 16:22, closed)

The missus...
Does this! The BOXER! Haw!
(Chickenwire social lubricator extraordinaire, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 13:23, closed)

/plays violin constructed from toilet paper.

must be hard having *real* problems.
(Gritty, yet fluffy. kipperpillock is obsessed with me =), Sat 12 Nov 2011, 14:13, closed)