Young People, eh?
It has come to my attention that young ladies these days seem to be a lot more forward than they were in my day. They wear less, they drink more. They're sexually promiscuous and [pause to wipe palms of hands on trousers] they appear to have a distinct lack of inhibition.

Young guys that I know tell stories of threesomes, foursomes and moresomes. Of one-night-stands and drunken debauchery. Of nightly conquests and guilt-free, multi-position, athletic boning.

So here's my question.

Why in the name of FUCK was I born in 1977?

*sigh*
(MrC. Having the most boring username on b3ta since 2004, Thu 8 Dec 2011, 23:06, 15 replies)

It was AIDS in the nineties that stoped us having fun.

(Me, I'm not... in any way intoxicated, Thu 8 Dec 2011, 23:11, closed)

Yeah, AIDS, that was it
Well that and the fact that I looked like the spotty offspring of Jo Brand and Robert Smith. But yeah, AIDS.
(MrC. Having the most boring username on b3ta since 2004, Thu 8 Dec 2011, 23:26, closed)

You and me both.
Even the most drunk and easy girls gave me a wide berth.
(Me, I'm not... in any way intoxicated, Thu 8 Dec 2011, 23:37, closed)

From my understanding of the 70s
you were born in 1977 because your parents met at a cocaine-fuelled orgy in a disco at the Playboy Mansion.
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Fri 9 Dec 2011, 2:27, closed)

You're thirty-fucking-four!
Geez, you're carrying on like you're a withered old prune of a man!
That guilt-free, multi-positioned, athletic boning is out there for you my man, you just need to go look for it.
Just saying is all.
(technocore, Fri 9 Dec 2011, 5:15, closed)

Yeah,
nothing at all creepy about mid-30s men, hanging about nightclubs and looking for casual sex.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 9 Dec 2011, 8:58, closed)

That's right.
It only gets creepy when you're in your mid forties.
(sabre-tooth monkey, Fri 9 Dec 2011, 9:13, closed)

Does it?
Oh bugger.
(username failed moderation, Fri 9 Dec 2011, 9:38, closed)

Plus la change
It has come to my attention that young ladies these days seem to be a lot more forward than they were in my day. They wear less, they drink more. They're sexually promiscuous and [pause to wipe palms of hands on trousers] they appear to have a distinct lack of inhibition.

Young guys that I know tell stories of threesomes, foursomes and moresomes. Of one-night-stands and drunken debauchery. Of nightly conquests and guilt-free, multi-position, athletic boning.

So here's my question.

Why in the name of FUCK was I born in 1967?

It has come to my attention that young ladies these days seem to be a lot more forward than they were in my day. They wear less, they drink more. They're sexually promiscuous and [pause to wipe palms of hands on trousers] they appear to have a distinct lack of inhibition.

Young guys that I know tell stories of threesomes, foursomes and moresomes. Of one-night-stands and drunken debauchery. Of nightly conquests and guilt-free, multi-position, athletic boning.

So here's my question.

Why in the name of FUCK was I born in 1957?

It has come to my attention that young ladies these days seem to be a lot more forward than they were in my day. They wear less, they drink more. They're sexually promiscuous and [pause to wipe palms of hands on trousers] they appear to have a distinct lack of inhibition.

Young guys that I know tell stories of threesomes, foursomes and moresomes. Of one-night-stands and drunken debauchery. Of nightly conquests and guilt-free, multi-position, athletic boning.

So here's my question.

Why in the name of FUCK was I born in 1947?

Etc
(theremin put the lotion in the basket on, Fri 9 Dec 2011, 7:48, closed)

God, Eve must have been a frigid bitch.

( MatJ LOOK, Fri 9 Dec 2011, 9:20, closed)

You've been born three times?

( shinyshinyscalp less a man, more a way of life, Fri 9 Dec 2011, 13:06, closed)

Look on the bright side
...at least we were born at a time when the internet was around. Imagine being that inept with women and also not having internet pr0n to assauge the urges...

Mind you, it's probably a good thing it hadn't been invented when I was 14, or I probably wouldn't have met any real women yet at all.
(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Fri 9 Dec 2011, 10:38, closed)

Back when finding porn meant looking in hedgerows on the walk home.

( number5 has been fighting tramps and losing., Fri 9 Dec 2011, 17:17, closed)

I was born in 1971 and there was plenty of debauchery in my youth.
Perhaps your real problem is that you're ugly, stupid and charmless?
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 9 Dec 2011, 10:59, closed)

Yay,
My first abuse from Dr Sham!
(MrC. Having the most boring username on b3ta since 2004, Sun 11 Dec 2011, 21:49, closed)