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This is a question Your first cigarette

To be honest, inhaling the fumes from some burning leaves isn't the most natural thing in the world.
Tell us about the first time. Where, when, and who were you trying to show off to?

Or, if you've never tried a cigarette, tell us something interesting on the subject of smoking.

Personally, I've never ever smoked a cigarette. Lung damage from pneumonia put me off.

(I helped save b3ta! chthonic, Wed 19 Mar 2008, 18:49)
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Let's get it over with
What a crap QOTW. Can we just cut to next Wednesday?

I got soaked to the skin going to church parade with the Scouts when I was 11. That was my first soggy rite.

I saw a french policeman hold up a train in Germany when I was 12. That was my first Zug arrete.

I was accosted by an amiable Liverpudlian drunk when I was 13. That was my first sick "a'reet?".

I iced a cake to look like my face when I was 14. That was my first sugarhead.

I broke the spine of a paperback when I was 15. Saggy read.

Given a parsnip by David Bowie. 16. Ziggy root.

Coach tour of pensioners on the A1. 17. Saga road.

Shot by the ex-king of Albania in an archery competition. 18. Zog arrowed.

SOMEBODY HELP ME! STOP THIS MADNESS NOW!
(ubergeekian, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 10:04, 8 replies)
*faints*
but bloody well done!
(I helped save b3ta! crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 10:07, closed)
WINNER!
Genuine belly laughs here...
(I helped save b3ta! Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 10:13, closed)
CLICK
It's the world-weary tone that really makes it.

Fantastic stuff.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 10:18, closed)
clicky.
Brilliant.
(Half of Stephen Fry's right buttock pissed on your dog on, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 10:19, closed)
Choked..
On my bacon sarnie.

Nicely done, Sir!
(I helped save b3ta! Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 10:30, closed)
*clicks*
Purely for the image of Bowie and a parsnip.
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 10:35, closed)
winner
Now change the topic
(frankspencer, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 10:54, closed)
^ Echoes frankspencer's sentiment
Although we'll probably get 'my first Question of the Week' as punishment.

Christ, this is scraping the barrel. Over 100 pages of suggestions and this gets selected? So far, 5 pages of answers, very few replies to answers - what does that tell you?
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 20 Mar 2008, 11:05, closed)

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