I don't care that I missed the cut off, your having it.
In my school we would occasionally be asked to put on little presentation based on something we were learning at the time.

In History we’d reached world war two and decided to go with the whole Nazi / Jew kerfuffle.

It was very tastefully done. We got the skinny kid with a big nose to dress in his pyjamas and hired an SS costume for the handsome athletic kid. I supplied the blank firing Luger, a must have possession for all school children...The whole thing was just a convoluted excuse to play with a replica gun at school. I don’t really remember the details of the one act production, but it ended with the ‘Nazi’ repeatedly screaming “Juden” whilst manically firing blanks at the kid in pyjamas.

We managed to put just enough effort into it for it to be possible to be judged as an ill-conceived, terribly executed, attempt at drama ( which it wasn’t) rather than a piss take (which it was).
(Brigadier an old boot sitting on a man's face - forever, Thu 20 Jun 2013, 16:05, 85 replies)

Did you try to recreate this scene?

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 20 Jun 2013, 16:19, closed)

That is cold dude.

(Shamelesspendant Better dead then smeg., Thu 20 Jun 2013, 16:24, closed)

Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.
George Santayana
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 20 Jun 2013, 16:36, closed)

Is it inappropriate quotes time?
Outside of a dog a book is a man's best friend, inside of a dog it's too dark to read.

Groucho Marx
(Shamelesspendant Better dead then smeg., Thu 20 Jun 2013, 16:40, closed)

Time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like a banana

Groucho Marx
(sittingduck Attention seeking, bullshitting fuck-knuckle, Thu 20 Jun 2013, 16:41, closed)

Mass executions are well lol, and are woefully underrepresented on comedy websites.

You prick.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Thu 20 Jun 2013, 16:33, closed)

Maybe you should write a poem about my mum
That would teach me
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 20 Jun 2013, 16:43, closed)

I agree with the Phantom here.
That's the first post on b3ta I've seen that's made me feel physically ill. There's definitely something wrong with you.
(searlichek, Thu 20 Jun 2013, 16:48, closed)

Have you not been here very long, then?

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 20 Jun 2013, 17:05, closed)

Lurking on and mostly off for five years
................ and you? Come here often? A/S/L?
(searlichek, Thu 20 Jun 2013, 17:18, closed)

Far too often.
There's a famous picture of a man having his brains blown out, that has seen regular usage over on /board, so there's really no sense in getting upset by the above picture.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 10:06, closed)

Now that you've mentioned it
That does sound oddly fascinating.
(searlichek, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 20:05, closed)

I take it you're not moved by the "napalm girl" photo that's
posted on b3ta regularly.
My take on h.h's reply was that he's pointing out how inappropriate the behaviour was in the lead story. As neither of us has asked him we won't know what he really meant by it.
( edjogs Collared doves are shit., Thu 20 Jun 2013, 19:24, closed)

^ THIS GUY GETS IT ^

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 20 Jun 2013, 19:26, closed)

Get you, with your fancy "common sense" and "ability to recognise sarcasm".

( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Thu 20 Jun 2013, 19:47, closed)

Yeah, what a wanker, eh?

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 20 Jun 2013, 19:58, closed)

First Hartley understood what I'd written, now GVP's understanding Hartley.

It's lovely.
(Brigadier an old boot sitting on a man's face - forever, Thu 20 Jun 2013, 19:59, closed)

I'm so happy that people understand you, I'm crying too
It also helps that this doesn’t make Happy Phantom look like a complete and utter prick
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 20 Jun 2013, 20:06, closed)

When you cry it makes me hard.

(Brigadier an old boot sitting on a man's face - forever, Thu 20 Jun 2013, 21:27, closed)

the harder the better
*cries harder*
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 20 Jun 2013, 22:42, closed)

Or...
He could've just posted an inappropriate pic on a txt based forum. Would've had more kudos with a cdc tbh.
Comedy website lolz and all that.
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Thu 20 Jun 2013, 21:19, closed)

Yeah
Why not lift the tone with one of your dead children stories
(Brigadier an old boot sitting on a man's face - forever, Thu 20 Jun 2013, 21:25, closed)

RINGO.......
we are so glad you can shed light on this...............



So what do you REALLY think?
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 20 Jun 2013, 22:40, closed)

This is a picture of the last few moments of some poor sod's life, just before he's publicly executed with a shot to the head and dumped into a mass grave, for no better reason than his race. It's horrific. I imagine there are contexts in which its inclusion is necessary in order to make a point, but this isn't one of them.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Thu 20 Jun 2013, 22:40, closed)

Are you really that dim?
you should have included a "Except your mum" bit


You are looking good in this one
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 20 Jun 2013, 22:48, closed)

I suppose it's possible. I've reread the thread a couple of times, and have yet to fathom why it was necessary to post a very sombre picture on a fairly lighthearted messageboard, but I may well be missing something. Perhaps you could talk me through it?
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Thu 20 Jun 2013, 22:58, closed)

You know what's the worst thing about this whole affair?
It's not even the REAL picture.


( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 15:24, closed)

Who needs Photoshop when you have scissors and glue?
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 15:43, closed)

This in my top ten photos ever.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:10, closed)

Having just waded through the indecipherable load of bollocks that is your "best story", I agree that someone should teach you something, at some point. Won't be me though - I don't do remedials.

Except your mum.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Thu 20 Jun 2013, 18:14, closed)

pssssstttttttt.
A little to the left the moral ground has a sharper incline
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 20 Jun 2013, 19:27, closed)

Re: that story.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 15:45, closed)

Oh you silly sausage.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Thu 20 Jun 2013, 20:00, closed)

Some people Ehhhhh?

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 20 Jun 2013, 20:07, closed)

sausage autist

HTH
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Thu 20 Jun 2013, 22:14, closed)

Your sparkling repartee is, as ever, fresh as a daisy.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Thu 20 Jun 2013, 23:14, closed)

alright Dr. Freud
do your employers know you're moonlighting as an internet psychiatrist when you should be working?
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Thu 20 Jun 2013, 23:50, closed)

That's quite an odd accusation, given that you've diagnosed me with autism just a couple of posts above, and with Asperger Syndrome, further up the thread you've linked.

I'm not sure why it's relevant, but yes - my employer is fully aware of my internet usage. Thank you for your interest.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 0:09, closed)

So they don't care if you skive off?

( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 0:30, closed)

Although I thanked you for your interest, it's getting a little bit intense and creepy now.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 0:38, closed)

hahaha, classic HP

( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 0:44, closed)

Was it difficult to choose between that and "comedy gold", or do you just flip a coin?
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 0:46, closed)

go on lad, make another John Major pic
or link to something dickish I posted 7 years ago, that always gets a laugh
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 0:52, closed)

Why would I bother linking to that, when there's a live feed?
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 0:56, closed)

hahaha, classic HP

( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 1:03, closed)

Exactly.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 1:08, closed)

Brilliant work from HP.
Posts on a website where people post dodgy soft child porn on the main page, gets upset when someone posts an image that's within the context of the thread.
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:39, closed)

is this OK?

( Ring Of Fire A petty, drooling belming butthurt retard., Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:17, closed)

Predictable and poorly executed*, but otherwise fine, I guess. Why?

*the picture, not Nguyen Van Lem. His execution was, by all accounts, very effective indeed.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:31, closed)

So what you're saying is execution pictures are acceptable if it's a vietnamese being killed coz they're barely human yellow monkeys
You fucking disgust me, you racist prick.
(Brigadier an old boot sitting on a man's face - forever, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:38, closed)

These liberal types are all the same.
Always happy to preach their livelihoods to others but never willing to follow their own advice.
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sat 22 Jun 2013, 0:18, closed)

I'm not sure what you thought this would mean, but it's come across as gibberish.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Sat 22 Jun 2013, 0:32, closed)

it is comes across?
it is come across?

really, with grammar like that you're in no position to call anyone "functionally illiterate"
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sat 22 Jun 2013, 0:33, closed)

Try expanding it to "it has".

You know, if you'd not wasted your school career making enthusiastic drum noises in assembly, you could have worked that out for yourself.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Sat 22 Jun 2013, 1:10, closed)

I think we can close b3ta now - this interesting, pithy, perfectly-punctuated retort has rendered all further postings pointless.
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sat 22 Jun 2013, 1:19, closed)

Sorry, I nodded off for a few hours there. I guess you score a TKO by dint of being unbearably dull.

How are your peas?
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Sat 22 Jun 2013, 9:57, closed)

yeah, this subthread's getting a bit stale now
UNNNNNNNNNG UNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNG oh god UNNNNNNGAAAAAAAAAAAAHPARPSPLOSH that's the noise you make when you're trying to do a toilet and it won't come out
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sat 22 Jun 2013, 17:56, closed)

Watch out GVP
he may make up a poem about your mum

Just saying, do you really want to upset someone that has that kind of power?
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sat 22 Jun 2013, 19:27, closed)

if he spends time drafting dour snide poetry, he'll have less time to go out and murder prostitutes
it's worth the risk
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sat 22 Jun 2013, 20:16, closed)

Aww, bless - you two have formed a retarded little mutual support group. You'll be singing upbeat motivational songs (just wait for gzzprfdffl's ad-libbed drum noises!) and plaiting each other's hair before sundown.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Sat 22 Jun 2013, 21:19, closed)

must... post... another... smartarse... comment...
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sat 22 Jun 2013, 21:28, closed)

smartarse...
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Sun 23 Jun 2013, 16:15, closed)

Did you post this story to provoke an online breakdown from Happy Phantom?

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:38, closed)

I'm not sure calling someone a prick for posting a picture of a racially motivated execution on a comedy website really qualifies as a "breakdown". I don't imagine it would take too much searching to find examples of people being called worse, for less. Still, if you feel that strongly about it, you could always put it in your list - that would certainly show me the error of my ways, given that I hold your opinion in such high regard.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:51, closed)

Keep digging HP you will get out of that hole

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 15:01, closed)

Shouldn't you be over on Reddit's gore* section, researching source material for your next killer post?

*NSFW, obviously.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 15:21, closed)

Why would you be on sites like that, if the image I posted is so offensive?

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 15:44, closed)

Reddit isn't exactly a closely guarded secret.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 15:48, closed)

So, let me get this straight, you don't want to see horrid things, but are happy to search the internet for them?

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 15:53, closed)

Nope. It was linked here before.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 16:29, closed)

Well seeing as you really want to know where I got the image from, here you go
www.independent.co.uk/life-style/history/nazi-war-criminals-got-away-with-atrocities-because-of-evidence-hidden-in-uk-and-us-archives-8640776.html


keep digging son
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 15:53, closed)

However if you were smart enough to click on the images properties
you would have known that, stick to kicking your shoe into the sea.
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 15:55, closed)

I don't really need IT lessons from a functionally illiterate prick, thanks. I'm not sure why you're crowing about the original source - it was handled with some dignity there, and with plenty of context. You posted it in a shit attempt to be edgy and shocking. Different sort of a thing.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 16:24, closed)

Hahaha so resorting to name calling
You really are a gift that keeps giving
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 16:43, closed)

I called you a prick with my first post in this thread. I'm very happy to stand by that. Pointing out your illiteracy is more of an observation than an insult.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 16:46, closed)

You do realise with each "I must have the last word" comment
you are looking more and more foolish?

Take a hint you have embarrassed yourself enough already
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:07, closed)

Press 'ignore' then, you halfwit. It's more effective than whining about "last words" like a particularly petulant five year old.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:26, closed)

You sound a bit upset are you OK?

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:42, closed)

Fine thanks - wrapping up and going to the pub now, so help yourself to that last word you were bleating about.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:26, closed)

I hope it's not me that has upset you or made you angry,
I mean if we couldn't be friends I don't know how I would be able to live with that.
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:48, closed)

enjoy your unpaid overtime, sucker

( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sat 22 Jun 2013, 0:00, closed)

This is, hands down, the lamest diss I've ever received. And I've had a few.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Sat 22 Jun 2013, 0:12, closed)

you do realise your slavish unpaid overtime won't be worth a continental damn when your job gets outsourced to India, don't you?

( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sat 22 Jun 2013, 0:25, closed)

Yeah, down with Indians, or whatever.

*fistbumps*
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Sat 22 Jun 2013, 0:36, closed)

There's no need for such blatant xenophobia.

( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sat 22 Jun 2013, 0:38, closed)