A few years ago I worked in a sales office in London, and we got a new guy in.
He was okay, but quite annoying, and wouldn't listen to anything he was told.

Since I was "training" him it fell to me to have a word with him one day about his severe body odour problem which was grossing us all out considerably. I took him to one side and gently explained; he was (predictably) mortified and promised to do better in future.

Two days later he was being his usual annoying self AND was stinking the place out again, so I took a can of Lynx out of my desk and slammed it on his desk in front of him.

He never stunk after that. It was a pretty mean thing to do though.
(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 16:57, 8 replies)

My boss sits
at his desk behind me, noisily farting without a care in the world.

I have a can of deodarant that I spray in his direction when he does it. He take no notice, just carries on.

Utter twat he is.
(username failed moderation, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 17:00, closed)

mean? I'm not so sure
you tried the tactful route - he had his chance
( finnbar has officially retired, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 17:12, closed)

Damn right that was mean!
Lynx ?
Could at least have got him something that smells better than rancid armpits.
( DukeEuphoria Comes highly reccomended, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 17:34, closed)

Hahaha, well I wasn't going to share my Pitrock with him :D

(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Sun 6 Nov 2011, 14:24, closed)

Ah well, needs must when the devil farts in your porrige.
Blindfold the lad, push him bodily into the nearest branch of LUSH, and when he emerges, eyes streaming, and nostrils scoured out with the overwhelming stench of chemical approximations to flower smells, tell him that that's exactly how he makes the rest of the office feel when he doesn't bloody well shower.

Sez I.
( DukeEuphoria Comes highly reccomended, Mon 7 Nov 2011, 11:23, closed)

Bollocks to him
He had ample opportunity to not be a smelly cunt.
(thefuckestuppest cheapened this, on, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 18:24, closed)

Not mean,
Sometimes you just have to, it's an invasive smell.
(Sir Clitherington Smythe offers him yourself., Sat 5 Nov 2011, 2:28, closed)

if someone can't be bothered to take care of themselves
shaming them into it is sometimes the only way
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 5 Nov 2011, 14:41, closed)