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This is a question Starting something you couldn't finish

Finnbar says: I used to know a guy who tattooed LOVE across his left knuckles, but didn't tattoo HATE on the other knuckles because he was right-handed and realised he couldn't finish. Ever run out of skills or inspiration halfway through a job?

(, Thu 24 Jun 2010, 13:32)
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Not me, Mrs SLVA has this new habit
She'll go to bed to read for a bit. I usually go to bed about 10 mins later, mainly because I'm the one that locks up and so on; that sort of pre-bedtime pottering about that seems to take far longer than it ought to.

So, I get upstairs and get in bed. I'm not one for reading, so I usually stick the headphones into my phone and listen to podcasts I've downloaded earlier that day.

She will then reach down and start fondling me. Less than 20 seconds later, I'm at full tumescence and I'm getting what is essentially a free handjob. This lasts for a few minutes and it's beginning to feel good, leg-tensingly good. Then she'll just stop and will not continue.
"What did you stop for?" I ask.
"Well, I didn't want a shag or anything, I was just having a fiddle"

This happens regularly. If I end up not getting a shag for a few days (such as when she's up on bricks), all of these false starts are going to result in a huge build up in pressure and I'll be set with a hair trigger. She'll start 'having a fiddle' and I'll go off with such force, it'll wash her off the bed, she'll be hopelessly gummed to the bedroom wall and the only way I'll free her is by steaming her off with the kettle.
(, Fri 25 Jun 2010, 15:32, closed)
You mean like this?
(, Fri 25 Jun 2010, 15:36, closed)
This offends me on so many levels. (Well, jealousy really.)
(, Fri 25 Jun 2010, 15:37, closed)

(, Fri 25 Jun 2010, 15:37, closed)
that's just wrong

(, Fri 25 Jun 2010, 15:43, closed)
I just got the weirdest mental picture ever.
Gee, thanks.
(, Fri 25 Jun 2010, 15:44, closed)

Excellent stuff!

(The post, not your predicament)
(, Fri 25 Jun 2010, 15:46, closed)
I thought you were dead?!
(, Fri 25 Jun 2010, 15:47, closed)
I am, I think...

At least that would explain the smell :(

How are you, you trolloping lump of man-tastic-ness?
(, Fri 25 Jun 2010, 15:49, closed)
Lol wut moment.

(, Fri 25 Jun 2010, 15:51, closed)
My girlfriend does something similar
She wakes up in the middle of the night and asks me to take my fingers for a stroll in her lady garden. When she's done she goes to sleep and leaves me hanging.

And she wonders why her pillow smells of jizz, she does have nice skin though
(, Fri 25 Jun 2010, 16:00, closed)
So after she falls asleep you stand over her and ejaculate on her pillow?

(, Fri 25 Jun 2010, 16:01, closed)
No, he lets me do that
In exchange for sucking him off.
(, Fri 25 Jun 2010, 17:06, closed)
He is correct
but you only do it because I'm ginger
(, Tue 29 Jun 2010, 13:06, closed)
Ah ha ha!
A click for the last sentence.
(, Fri 25 Jun 2010, 16:01, closed)
Take up reading in bed.
Then start dipping your fingers in the scented folds and have a wiggle.
Stop, rinse repeat. When she is shivering like a shitting dog, stop.
Tell her you just wanted your finger wet to turn the page.
(, Fri 25 Jun 2010, 16:30, closed)
I'd 'like' this
but I love it instead, that last sentence in OP is da winnahz.

The whole thread as well as the reply above.
(, Mon 28 Jun 2010, 0:37, closed)

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