Ahh, Memories.
When I was in me final year of an all male secondary school, I didn't really run with one group, being the "off-kilter" (ie. unhinged)one in the year group. Now I thought an unnamed person was a total Twunt, however he was more popular than me so picking a fight wasn't an option.

Then in the space of a week my chance to unleash a hate-filled yet funny as fuck attack on him that made his mates piss themselves. Twunt broke out in a horrible dose of plukes giving his face a white pebbled texture, Snogged a first cousin of his and knowing of their familial connections and to finish either broke or sprained, can't remember sorry, his ankle leaving him on crutches. Seeing him move around for one day, by the end of our after school study period i was forced to go on, came up with a name combining mushrooms, a passing Hamlet reference (Play not cigar), cowboys and kangaroos including Liberal use of his McXXXXX suffixed name.

I christened him Fengis McClaudius McHopalongSkip.
His mates collapsed and as he was on crutches retaliation would have been easily dealt with. His mates adopted it for the last 6-7 months of school breaking it up as needed or strung together to piss him off. Donal the legend rang up a message line left by DJ with a wicked sense of humour on 2fm singing Fengis McClaudius McHopalongSkip to a tune he made up himself. DJ liked that so much played it all that week.
The memory always makes me smile.
Length/Girth/Whatever.
( Spider Fucking Riviera got stiches for a knife wound for the first time, Fri 19 May 2006, 15:11, Reply)