I've hurt
my finger.
( DrPoppers Touched by his noodly appendage, Sun 3 Jul 2005, 19:44, archived)

Diddums.

( Comma, Sun 3 Jul 2005, 19:44, archived)

In fairness you cant stuff adult appendages into a Guinea pig that small

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Sun 3 Jul 2005, 19:45, archived)

take it out of yo' ass

( Hidden Mouse, Sleeping Kitten Gromada? Gromada!, Sun 3 Jul 2005, 19:45, archived)

Harrumph
I think I dislocated it again
( DrPoppers Touched by his noodly appendage, Sun 3 Jul 2005, 19:46, archived)

yo' ass?
trés difficile
( Hidden Mouse, Sleeping Kitten Gromada? Gromada!, Sun 3 Jul 2005, 19:47, archived)

le sange
et dans le arbour
( DrPoppers Touched by his noodly appendage, Sun 3 Jul 2005, 19:50, archived)

*ahem*
l'arbre
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Sun 3 Jul 2005, 19:51, archived)

meh
I've been drinking snakebite all afternoon.
( DrPoppers Touched by his noodly appendage, Sun 3 Jul 2005, 19:54, archived)

also
est that I missed before
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Sun 3 Jul 2005, 19:55, archived)

is it?
is it really? Well stick it up my ass & keep it warm for a bit
( Hidden Mouse, Sleeping Kitten Gromada? Gromada!, Sun 3 Jul 2005, 19:52, archived)

monkey cock
in a lady's arse, I'm sure I've seen that film.
( DrPoppers Touched by his noodly appendage, Sun 3 Jul 2005, 19:57, archived)

this does not surprise me

( Hidden Mouse, Sleeping Kitten Gromada? Gromada!, Sun 3 Jul 2005, 19:58, archived)

ma coeur saigne pour toi

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Sun 3 Jul 2005, 19:54, archived)

*sympathies*
my toes, hips, shoulders and jaw dislocate really easily and it's not nice
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Sun 3 Jul 2005, 19:48, archived)

So pop it back in you big poof.

(goat thinks you're shit, Sun 3 Jul 2005, 19:49, archived)

I did
and it stings like billio whatever the fuck that is.
( DrPoppers Touched by his noodly appendage, Sun 3 Jul 2005, 19:51, archived)

don't expect any sympathy here
for your carelessness
( Enigmatic ™                 Voice No More                  ©, Sun 3 Jul 2005, 19:45, archived)

Aww.
You can use another if you like, I'm not bothered.
( Druid, Sun 3 Jul 2005, 19:45, archived)

Ye've hurt yer finger?
Puir wee lamb.
Yer pinkie? Dearie me.
Noo jist ye hud it that way
till I get my specs and see.
Oh aye, and there's the skelf
Noo dinnae greet nae mare.
I've gone and gotten it oot,
see that wisnae sare
Noo there nah, run awa'

/poem learnt at primary school, a bit hazy on the last few lines
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Sun 3 Jul 2005, 19:46, archived)

did you go to school in france?

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Sun 3 Jul 2005, 19:48, archived)

( Jadeviper was still alive on, Sun 3 Jul 2005, 19:49, archived)

courtesy of google
The Sair Finger
by Walter Wingate

You've hurt your finger? Puir wee man!
Your pinkie? Deary me!
Noo, juist you haud it that wey till
I get my specs and see!

My, so it is - and there's the skelf!
Noo, dinna greet nae mair.
See there - my needle's gotten't out!
I'm sure that wasna sair?

And noo, to make it hale the morn,
Put on a wee bit saw,
And tie a Bonnie hankie roun't
Noo, there na - rin awa'!

Your finger sair ana'? Ye rogue,
You're only lettin' on.
Weel, weel, then - see noo, there ye are,
Row'd up the same as John!

one for the bairnies
(Mehitabel_Itrang, Sun 3 Jul 2005, 19:50, archived)

aye!
that's the one :) well, it was 20 years ago that I learnt it :P
( Jadeviper was still alive on, Sun 3 Jul 2005, 19:53, archived)

?
( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Sun 3 Jul 2005, 19:51, archived)

Those crasy Scotch.

( Comma, Sun 3 Jul 2005, 19:49, archived)

I've bent my wookie

(Mehitabel_Itrang, Sun 3 Jul 2005, 19:46, archived)

Well
I've hurt two. *And* they're now fat, and turning black.

Fear my fat fingers.
( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Sun 3 Jul 2005, 19:48, archived)

I'll try a different approach.
How?
( Shoosh up your lips Not state-funded, Sun 3 Jul 2005, 19:48, archived)

pissed barbecue
incident
( DrPoppers Touched by his noodly appendage, Sun 3 Jul 2005, 19:52, archived)

What did you do to piss the barbecue off?

( Shoosh up your lips Not state-funded, Sun 3 Jul 2005, 19:55, archived)