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Well well.
I have a hot date tonight. I can't remember the last time I went on an actual date. Any advice? Is there anything new in the world of dating?
(I helped save b3ta! Jobe, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 10:01, archived)
rohypnol
it's not new, but it is a classic.
(I helped save b3ta! DrPoppers Touched by his noodly appendage, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 10:02, archived)
Rohypnol.
/pre-fucking-dictable
(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Tue 5 Jul 2005, 10:02, archived)
Its now considered good manners
to shove your cock into your dates ear whilst eating dessert.
(I helped save b3ta! comrade yannovski and then, of course, there was the schnapps monkey, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 10:02, archived)
what if
you choose a dessert without dates?
(I helped save b3ta! Jadeviper was still alive on, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 10:04, archived)
I dont know
Im just pleased I didnt spell desert instead of dessert.
(I helped save b3ta! comrade yannovski and then, of course, there was the schnapps monkey, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 10:15, archived)
Don't ask me...
I went on a date at the end of April. It wasn't what you would call a success.

/single
(I helped save b3ta! The Teviot Moose major 5th., Tue 5 Jul 2005, 10:02, archived)
Have a wank beforehand
during, and after.

Try not to cry when she asks you simple questions.

make sure your shirt is tucked into your underpants, and your trousers into your socks.
(I helped save b3ta! Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 10:03, archived)
If it goes tits up, try this instead:
www.greenlighter.org/viewtopic.php?t=94
(I helped save b3ta! Nimble Colin camera-wrangling, globe-trotting whisky enthusiast, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 10:03, archived)
That explains all the
shit I got in the pub a few weeks back.
(I helped save b3ta! DrPoppers Touched by his noodly appendage, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 10:04, archived)
blimey.
never new that.
(I helped save b3ta! Jobe, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 10:07, archived)


(I helped save b3ta! Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 10:12, archived)
Eat lots of garlic
and don't forget the rohypnol
(tacpprm has a mmrpcat, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 10:03, archived)
Or the mindpiss...

(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Tue 5 Jul 2005, 10:05, archived)
I haven't been on a date
in eleven days short of ten years. haven't a clue
(I helped save b3ta! Jadeviper was still alive on, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 10:03, archived)
Buy her a glass of Unicum
'Its the foul sex lotion of the jolly green giant'
(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 10:03, archived)
Just play nice

(I helped save b3ta! Giant bunny jumping out like a large happy tourettes rabbit, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 10:04, archived)
Spit out the stone.

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 10:04, archived)
Stay less drunk than your date.

/never been on a date with anyone I wasn't already going out with
(I helped save b3ta! Newington, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 10:06, archived)
how can you be going out with someone
you haven't yet had a date with?
(I helped save b3ta! Jadeviper was still alive on, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 10:07, archived)

www.Thaibrides.com
(I helped save b3ta! Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 10:08, archived)
I ordered one of those, but she came in the wrong size and colour,
so I sent her back for a refund.
(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Tue 5 Jul 2005, 10:17, archived)
By being friends first
Then if you wake up next to each other three weekends in a row, you're going out.
(I helped save b3ta! Newington, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 10:09, archived)
If you each drug the other,
how do you wind up in bed?
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 10:13, archived)
Haha!
You wake up on the carpet mentally kicking yourselves.
(I helped save b3ta! Newington, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 10:21, archived)
I think these are the rules I play by.

(I helped save b3ta! Nimble Colin camera-wrangling, globe-trotting whisky enthusiast, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 10:13, archived)
It's like an extract from "The Rules"
What about if you're travelling and sharing a tent with your best friend?
(I helped save b3ta! Johnny Catfish - Yowsa!, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 10:13, archived)
I think it depends
whether you share a sleeping bag too
(I helped save b3ta! Jadeviper was still alive on, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 10:17, archived)
How do you think he got his last boyfriend?

(I helped save b3ta! The Teviot Moose major 5th., Tue 5 Jul 2005, 10:17, archived)
Serious answer:
I imagine by the time you're best friends, you know whether you want to have sex with each other, or whether it'd be worth trying.

I speak only roughly, I will never read "The Rules" in my life and find quite offensive the fact that it's even been written.

Frivolous answer: I heard someone talk about "the rules" relating to your friend staying in your bed once (I guess the same thing applies to tents.) Something like, the owner of the bed is the one that's allowed to make an attempt without fear of embarrassment. I never knew it was that complicated either.
(I helped save b3ta! Newington, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 10:19, archived)
I agree - before setting off, something may have to be said, though:
"By the way, Dave. If we wake up together three weekends in a row then we are officially a couple. Do you want me to ring Julie now?"

"The Rules": I've been married for three years now, but I can't imagine that I'd ever have gone out with anyone who took "The Rules" seriously.
(I helped save b3ta! Johnny Catfish - Yowsa!, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 10:25, archived)
I am the
same as this. I've already known anyone I have been out with. It's quite exciting, but I'm rather nervous. Theodds are pretty good on me doing something really embarassing!
(I helped save b3ta! Jobe, Tue 5 Jul 2005, 10:17, archived)