DEAR MR BALDMONKEY
YOU WILL FACE INTERNET CRIMINAL CHARGES.

I NEED 12 PEOPLE TO VOLUNTEER FOR JURY SERVICE - APPLICATION VIA GAZ.
(INTERNETLAWYERMAN QC: Ace Attorney, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:33, archived)

guilty
of all crimes, ban him
( mongychops, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:39, archived)

I'm going to hire Police Dog as my defence law person.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:39, archived)

is he a bar(k)rister
or a solic(e)itor?

sorry :(
(King Baby Duck more than a ceiling, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:42, archived)

You mean a solisetter

( ArthurTheRat, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:44, archived)

Or a barristerrier

( Newington, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:46, archived)

or a labradawyer

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:47, archived)

I'd say this wins.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:49, archived)

Or a
district attornjak
( Newington, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 16:47, archived)

DEAR THE ACCUSED
SO BE IT.

I SHALL PIMPASS PROSECUTE YOU SO HARD THAT YOU WILL SPEND THE REST OF YOUR LIFE IN INTERNET PRISON FOR THE TERRIBLE CRIMES YOU HAVE COMMITED.

I am gathering loyal JURYMEN and JURYWOMEN to act as a panel to DELIVER AN INTERNET VERDICT.

I PROPOSE Lord Justice JAM MASTER GEORDIE AS JUSTICE OF THE PEACE.
(INTERNETLAWYERMAN QC: Ace Attorney, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 17:01, archived)

DEAL!

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 17:02, archived)

I WILL SEE YOU IN COURT

(INTERNETLAWYERMAN QC: Ace Attorney, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 17:06, archived)