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NOT HAVING THIS. People are turning on me over this.
Enough insinuations.
Here is what happened:

My family and I went to Two Hats' for dinner on Tuesday night with him and his family.
During the course of the evening Two Hats kept swearing in front of my children. I didn't like it. I asked him to stop.
When he didn't I lost my temper.
There was an argument. We left.
Despite repeated accusations by text, gaz and phone, I DID NOT STEAL ANYTHING FROM HIS HOUSE.
Moreover, if anyone is a sexpest, it's him, according to my wife. I'm willing to overlook this though. He was a bit drunk.
(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:03, archived)
haha, you mad thieving cunt

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:05, archived)
oh man, this is just like Lennon and McCartney

(arseboon dilbaro arseboon dilbaro, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:05, archived)
HUH! It was you that swore in front of MY kids you prick!

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:05, archived)
And I wasn't drunk, you idiot

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:06, archived)
You were shit faced.
Even your wife was apologising for you.
(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:12, archived)
THAT IS BULLSHIT
I had like 4 glasses of fucking wine.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:12, archived)
oh man, best thread ever, so glad i signed up now
might donate cos o this
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:06, archived)
TICK

(arseboon dilbaro arseboon dilbaro, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:07, archived)
don't think i need to flounce now, this is the biznez

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:08, archived)
I'm compelled to believe you as you're not a flood posting needy autism.

(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:08, archived)
did you set anything on fire?

(arseboon dilbaro arseboon dilbaro, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:05, archived)
I believe Two Hats.

(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:06, archived)
but you guys were fine on wednesday werent you?

(I helped save b3ta! sleepybinky, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:06, archived)
Tried to be. Tried to not let it matter.
But a certain CUNT won't let it lie.
(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:08, archived)
I sent you a message saying it didn't matter
It was you that kept it going.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:10, archived)
You know you both look tremendously pathetic right now though don't you?

(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:19, archived)
did you repair the hole in the wall?

(arseboon dilbaro arseboon dilbaro, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:11, archived)
I can come round and torch the whole fucking room if he likes.

(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:13, archived)
Oh. more threats of violence, really classy

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:19, archived)
You say that as if, at one point, baldmonkey made you think he had class.

(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:20, archived)
Well he's always going on about burning shit, it gets tiresome

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:22, archived)
I imagine being friends with a spastic can be difficult at times.

(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:23, archived)
I think I speak for everyone when I ask this question
What did you have for dinner?
(PsychoChomp, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:07, archived)
oh god yes

(I helped save b3ta! sleepybinky, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:10, archived)
It was sweet and sour chicken
my own recipe. It's actually very nice.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:11, archived)
Cool, with rice?

(PsychoChomp, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:12, archived)
Yeah
Cooked in turmeric to make it yellow, then put each portion into an egg ring to make it look a bit more interesting than usual. Then some thinly sliced green pepper on top for garnish. Looked really nice.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:14, archived)
You should invite me round for dinner, I'm a bit sweary but I don't punch walls.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:15, archived)
You'd probably do some wife groping though.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:17, archived)
You're more than welcome
Just don't swear and punch...oh, you already said you wouldn't. Yeah, cool.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:18, archived)
Have you got anything left to steal?

(PsychoChomp, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:19, archived)
Ha, barely

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:20, archived)
Just post on offtopic instead
bm can't go there and people can pop in and say hello etc.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:22, archived)
yeah its where the cool kids hang out

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:25, archived)
his wife

(arseboon dilbaro arseboon dilbaro, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:20, archived)
His dignity until he started arguing with baldmonkey online.

(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:22, archived)
did balders eat it all?

(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:15, archived)
Ha...yeah, and the rest
He eats like a fucking pig
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:16, archived)
Perfect response

(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:21, archived)
where did he touch your wife balders?

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:07, archived)
show us on this doll

(arseboon dilbaro arseboon dilbaro, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:08, archived)
This is a fucking lie
And I'm not saying anything more about this. BM knows the truth.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:08, archived)
was it flange or boob?
I reckon baldmonkey's mrs has sandpaper flaps
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:09, archived)
god i wish i could tell if this was all for real real and not just for play play
but i just cant tell i just cant :(
(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:11, archived)
I think you need to mediate

(arseboon dilbaro arseboon dilbaro, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:13, archived)
i think we all need to get on some chat room where we can do it live

(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:14, archived)
You should get Fouricci to do it.

(I helped save b3ta! WormuIus, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:25, archived)
yeh totally gonna believe you're the good guy in this, well believable

(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:11, archived)
this is clearly one big jape

(likeajackhammer, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:13, archived)
I WANT IT TO BE REAL

(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:13, archived)
This is how Personality Horse will storm the charts
With DRAMA
(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Fri 4 Nov 2011, 14:15, archived)