I have just received this email from '[email protected]', it couldn't have come at a better time tbh
Everybody farts but do you know if yours are normal? Is the smell of yours a sign of deadly disease?

One BIG myth about farts could put you at high risk of colon, prostate, and stomach cancer while adding 5 to 7 inches to your waistline.

In fact, a famous gastroenterologist (M.D. specializing in digestion, gut, poop etc) suggests that over 100 million Americans are spiking their risk and “smelling” far worse than they need to because they are deficient in this one “stinky” nutrient that fixes farts.

The trick is that this one “stinky” nutrient helps you poop out the toxins that cause unhealthy farts, weight gain, constipation, bloating, and even elevated cancer risk.

Medical doctors around the world are shocked by how quickly this one “stinky” nutrient fixes smelly farts, bathroom troubles, and belly bloating, and stubborn fat.

How can you increase your levels of the one “stinky” nutrient overnight? I’ll show you exactly how at the link below...

This 1 “stinky” nutrient is fixing farts, perfecting poops, and taking 5 to 7 inches off waists FAST all across America
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 13:04, archived)

But why do you care about american waistlines

(dribble, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 13:16, archived)

my dad lives there innit

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 13:17, archived)

Doesn't mean that his body shape has to synchronise

(dribble, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 13:28, archived)

When in rome, have super size fries with that

(dribble, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 13:44, archived)

then do a load of stinky farts

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 15:15, archived)

Flatulenta
Incontinentia's sister
(dribble, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 15:37, archived)

That was me m8

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 13:36, archived)

alright Normal Farts, how's it going?

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 13:57, archived)

Farting out the front isn't as much of a laugh as you'd think, I have to be honest

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 13:58, archived)

I am both surprised, and disappointed, to read this

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 15:13, archived)

The good thing is that when it happens, you can just say that you can't help it

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 16:09, archived)

thank you for cheering up McQueef

( Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 14:23, archived)

It's both my blessing and my curse

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 14:27, archived)

Farting out the front, I mean

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 14:27, archived)

I thought it was called burping

(dribble, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 15:51, archived)

You can think what you like

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 16:15, archived)

Americans do like a big smelly trump

( broadsword now that's fresh, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 13:58, archived)

Haha, like their president!!!

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Tue 12 Jan 2021, 20:15, archived)

i get it!

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 20:52, archived)

Haha, no I don't much!!

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 21:19, archived)

i.imgur.com/8lmKXs7.jpg
(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 21:36, archived)

targeted advertising for the win

( Turing's Artificial Hand Sig Sauer, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 14:02, archived)

Looks like someone needs to clear their cookies

(dribble, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 14:05, archived)

no wonder they call them air biscuits

( Turing's Artificial Hand Sig Sauer, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 14:09, archived)

b3ta.com/talk/8288962
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 15:15, archived)

i just bought some cookies
do i need to throw them away?
(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 20:53, archived)

alright

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Tue 12 Jan 2021, 14:07, archived)

y

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 15:15, archived)

Mark Keds?
MARK DEADS, MORE LIKE!!!!
(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Tue 12 Jan 2021, 16:03, archived)

Lifeless Things

(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 19:03, archived)

God I've not thought about them for years
They were shit
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 21:24, archived)

but if your farts don't stink, how can you deter muggers?
think it through, normal farts!
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 17:22, archived)

Always carry The Blade

(dribble, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 18:21, archived)

i don't have pockets
and i'm damned if i'm keeping a blade in my bra
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 18:26, archived)

It should be on your back, like leonardo

(dribble, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 18:30, archived)

you mean i should take my sword and wear it on my back?

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 18:35, archived)

Well I suppose you could wear it on your front but you'd probably puncture your femoral when sitting down for the first time

(dribble, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 19:32, archived)

m b
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Tue 12 Jan 2021, 20:17, archived)

Haha, norbal farts, good joke monster munch late of this parish!!

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 21:21, archived)

Can confirm, am shocked

(Agent Pr1ck llǝɯs ǝɥʇ sʇI ˙ǝɔɐld sᴉɥʇ ǝʇɐɥ l, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 18:31, archived)

Fart yourself thin

(dribble, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 18:44, archived)

Bet they didn't teach you THAT during 7 years at some fancy medical school eh

(dribble, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 18:59, archived)

What was that diet drug that was supposed to prevent your body absorbing fats but just gave everyone the chronic shits instead?

( Turing's Artificial Hand Sig Sauer, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 19:19, archived)

Cheaper to just stop eating fatty food

(dribble, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 19:33, archived)

what, and miss out on a whole evening of explosive, greasy shits?

( Turing's Artificial Hand Sig Sauer, Tue 12 Jan 2021, 20:01, archived)

Terrible bullying of Gonz. :(((

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Tue 12 Jan 2021, 20:14, archived)