Late afternoon thread
I don't suppose anyone is doing anything of note this weekend. I'm going to get off my nut and play records tonight, tomorrow likely a writeoff as a result but we're going to have an Asian snacks fest at some point later in the day: gyozas, some little dim sum things, coconut panko prawns, that kind of shit.

Might teabag a toucan also.

In tribute to the lovely Doveston, who made a welcome return recently:

www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-55937157
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 16:26, archived)

2/7 tit-spanner

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 16:30, archived)

I will be working tomorrow carrying out a fan coil unit service across two floors with my team . Probably just go home then, get drunk and think of trannys

(Nicki Minaj, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 16:35, archived)

great new hobby you've picked up there
just think when all this is over you can whisk yourself off to Thailand and go nuts

literally
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 16:36, archived)

Will the thai trannys like me,? They seemed to in 2005, but the worlds changed

(Nicki Minaj, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 16:41, archived)

you can’t say tranny any more m8
The term is ‘ladyperson’
( Cheers Cheers, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 16:43, archived)

As my brother pointed out to me they are a SHE, and to remember that when I'm sucking their cock

(Nicki Minaj, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 16:53, archived)

Wise words

( Cheers Cheers, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 17:15, archived)

also
Probably just go home then, get drunk and think of trannys

- Jonty
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 16:37, archived)

Its certainly the vibe, my old man got his oxford jab today, bet he's gutted

(Nicki Minaj, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 16:44, archived)

Taking names, wasting fools
and maybe some scrabble

Edit: 7/7 what a result
( Cheers Cheers, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 16:41, archived)

Love a bit of scrabs

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 17:16, archived)

s
( Cheers Cheers, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 17:20, archived)

scrab? good work, monster munch!!!

(evening cheesy arse grease innit, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 17:30, archived)

Gone but never remembered

( Cheers Cheers, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 17:33, archived)

lemme at him, member

(dribble, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 17:49, archived)

doing beef green pepper later
after i get my hair cut

Edit:4/7
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 16:56, archived)

my favourite

Edit: how are you getting your haircut in lockdown?
( Boris Johnson's Press Secretary, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 18:55, archived)

More lies

(dribble, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 19:09, archived)

And no peppers are green

(dribble, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 19:10, archived)

where do the obvious lies end???

(evening cheesy arse grease innit, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 19:16, archived)

My niece is still living with me
And she's a hairdresser
( Smash Monkey 2 Cannot actually train spiders, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 19:41, archived)

Friday is here, yiss
I got 4/7 on that quiz thing
( Turing's Artificial Hand Sig Sauer, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 17:03, archived)

3
I really am not fucking feeling it today
( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 17:59, archived)

why? out of lube?

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 18:03, archived)

If you ever run out of lube
You REALLY feel it. I’d categorise “going in dry” as advanced practitioner only.
( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 18:31, archived)

as my old boss said once,
"dry, dry, make 'er cry"

he was a bit of a nutter
( Turing's Artificial Hand Sig Sauer, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 18:59, archived)

Lover of the Russian quy

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 19:58, archived)

heh

( Turing's Artificial Hand Sig Sauer, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 20:01, archived)

Isn't it just a case of relative diameters
you could have a slimline gentleman paired with a "well practiced" receiver, no danger of an interference fit there
(dribble, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 19:20, archived)

https://b3ta.com/talk/8292426
( Turing's Artificial Hand Sig Sauer, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 20:36, archived)

Insert shaft D into hole A then tighten nuts, grease may help with the insertion.

(dribble, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 21:45, archived)

Weed arrived today and I got a 4 day weekend, YES I
Looks like a HD transfer of Fatal Flying Guillotines is on Prime at the minute.
( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 18:20, archived)

Oh man that is a fucking CLASSIC, top 5, no quezzles
I've just picked up a few grams of 'gelato' along with my shoe. Guy is a pro level stoner and he reckons it's 10/10
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 19:05, archived)

I'm on Stawdawg but will get some hash in for my next lot as a treat I reckon

( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 19:24, archived)

I've got some Red Leb and some Royal Ketama and I am rationing the the shit out of it

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 19:57, archived)

All my weed seems to be the same, but as I canning the fuck out of it, who knows

(Nicki Minaj, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 19:27, archived)

2/7 worthless breathwaste, and one of the two was a guess ffs

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 19:12, archived)

Yeah not my best ever 2day either m8

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 20:14, archived)

Just sharted out about two tablespoons of whole peas into the bog
Note to self: chew your food
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 20:35, archived)

I've been doing some really loud farts of late.
I wouldn't be surprised if the downstairs neighbour hears them in the dead of night.
( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 22:11, archived)

Can relate
o a
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 5 Feb 2021, 23:32, archived)

whale peas

(dribble, Sat 6 Feb 2021, 0:05, archived)

I'm gonna spend the weekend on /board
/boarding the loft that is! Hahaha
(Agent Pr1ck llǝɯs ǝɥʇ sʇI ˙ǝɔɐld sᴉɥʇ ǝʇɐɥ l, Sat 6 Feb 2021, 1:47, archived)