you're right mate, slashtalk doesn't get any better than train ticket advance booking chat!

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 28 Jul 2021, 12:46, archived)

maybe you can steer the conversation towards tax and pensions to really get things rocking
also: not your mate
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 28 Jul 2021, 12:50, archived)

Have you had any customers with funny names this week?

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 28 Jul 2021, 12:58, archived)

I'm afraid not, 'Arseboon Dilbaro'

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 28 Jul 2021, 13:15, archived)

thanks, 'Queef Richard's'
Might start self-harming now.
(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 28 Jul 2021, 13:22, archived)

whatever you do, don't accidentally cut too deep and hit an artery
or do, I'm not the police.
(sticklebrlcks link in bio ❤️🌟❤️, Wed 28 Jul 2021, 18:40, archived)

It's spelled "archery" m8
Bit embarrassing
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 28 Jul 2021, 19:35, archived)

I'm sure everyone is dying to get an update on the status of my mortgage application.

(Agent Pr1ck llǝɯs ǝɥʇ sʇI ˙ǝɔɐld sᴉɥʇ ǝʇɐɥ l, Wed 28 Jul 2021, 14:16, archived)

what lender is it in with?
Property super expensive but right now but it's never been easier to obtain a mortgage, how crazy is that???????????
(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 28 Jul 2021, 14:18, archived)

Santander I think. Not really sure, my wife sorts all of that stuff out.

(Agent Pr1ck llǝɯs ǝɥʇ sʇI ˙ǝɔɐld sᴉɥʇ ǝʇɐɥ l, Wed 28 Jul 2021, 14:37, archived)

I don't really know what their service is like, I hold mortgage advice qualifications but haven't worked in that area for nearly 10 years!!!!!!

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 28 Jul 2021, 14:45, archived)

what l I am a complete b
is it in with? Property super expensive but right now but it's never been easier to obtain a mortgage
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 28 Jul 2021, 18:02, archived)

did you bottle it with that fucked house?

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 28 Jul 2021, 14:29, archived)

Not yet, stringing them along whilst we wait to see if the mother in law is going to give us money to buy a better one.
I don't think she likes the idea of having to live with us while the house is being fixed any more than we do.
(Agent Pr1ck llǝɯs ǝɥʇ sʇI ˙ǝɔɐld sᴉɥʇ ǝʇɐɥ l, Wed 28 Jul 2021, 14:37, archived)

hahah make sure you are *extra* annoying for a while to really put the wind up her
I'm sure you can manage that
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 28 Jul 2021, 15:19, archived)

Yes that is the plan.
Plus frequently reminding her that she can't take it with her and we'll be the ones choosing her nursing home.
(Agent Pr1ck llǝɯs ǝɥʇ sʇI ˙ǝɔɐld sᴉɥʇ ǝʇɐɥ l, Wed 28 Jul 2021, 20:00, archived)

Strikey fuck a horse

( broadsword now that's fresh, Wed 28 Jul 2021, 14:59, archived)

old skool classix vol.1

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 28 Jul 2021, 15:22, archived)

Dammit, I totally forgot to update slashtalk about the trials and tribulations of our mortgage renewal six months ago.
I guess that ship has sailed now.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Wed 28 Jul 2021, 18:51, archived)