Pushing all the pricks down the board
I've added support for a more efficient PHP backend to the site.
It's been deployed as a canary deployment, which means when you load a page there's 50/50 chance that you will get the old site or the new one.

If you see any new issues, especially any that look random then let my representative on the mortal plane know.
( God - smiting mortals since 4004 BC, Wed 9 Oct 2024, 13:50, archived)

I deployed my PHPænus up your nan’s backend last night

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 9 Oct 2024, 13:55, archived)

in b4 the b&

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 9 Oct 2024, 13:56, archived)

She told me about it
You should get checked for gingivitis
( Sn0tters 🇯🇴🇧🇧🇮🇪, Wed 9 Oct 2024, 13:57, archived)

Poor Rob

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 9 Oct 2024, 13:57, archived)

ack ell
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 9 Oct 2024, 13:57, archived)

LOL backend

(evening 'My stage name is DJ Teargas', Wed 9 Oct 2024, 13:59, archived)

sure, no worries Lord, blessed be your name

( Queef Richard's U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 9 Oct 2024, 13:59, archived)

suckup

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 9 Oct 2024, 14:04, archived)

I've booked your place in heaven laddo

( Sn0tters 🇯🇴🇧🇧🇮🇪, Wed 9 Oct 2024, 14:13, archived)

Thanks for explaining the term 'canary deployment' but given that you had to define it, then why include it? Just the definition itself is enough. Can you explain your reasoning?

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 9 Oct 2024, 14:01, archived)

I also can't see why you'd need an earthly intermediary given your omnipotent all-knowing nature, it just makes no sense.

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 9 Oct 2024, 14:03, archived)

He's fucking useless is why

( Sn0tters 🇯🇴🇧🇧🇮🇪, Wed 9 Oct 2024, 14:14, archived)

I’m still welcome in heaven right?

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 9 Oct 2024, 14:21, archived)

Heaven is a half pipe

( mongychops, Wed 9 Oct 2024, 14:23, archived)

-half +full

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 9 Oct 2024, 15:29, archived)

Depends if he was watching you this morning or not

( Sn0tters 🇯🇴🇧🇧🇮🇪, Wed 9 Oct 2024, 14:27, archived)

I reloaded the page but it’s still full of pricks

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 9 Oct 2024, 14:02, archived)

Mine is full of canaries

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 9 Oct 2024, 14:03, archived)

You sure that's not Twitter?

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 9 Oct 2024, 14:22, archived)

no m8 that's full of cunts

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 9 Oct 2024, 15:29, archived)

You created man in your own image
Surely this means that you're the biggest prick of all?
( Smash Monkey 2 The damp spastic, Wed 9 Oct 2024, 14:04, archived)

Half the time nothing loads at all, I guess that would be the new site.

( brb Learn Ukrainian and prepare for a referendum, Wed 9 Oct 2024, 16:52, archived)

It took 3 goes to post that^

( brb Learn Ukrainian and prepare for a referendum, Wed 9 Oct 2024, 16:53, archived)

Only 1 to post that^

( brb Learn Ukrainian and prepare for a referendum, Wed 9 Oct 2024, 16:53, archived)

The adverts in the top right have the text duplicated twice.
(HeyManPutEmOldThingsBack has just drove his car into a quarry, Wed 9 Oct 2024, 18:44, archived)

NEW PERSON ALERT
Hello new person, show us your tits. Or your fanny. We don’t mind, we’re inclusive here.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 9 Oct 2024, 18:50, archived)

duplicated twice? so there's three?

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 9 Oct 2024, 20:52, archived)