So my 15 year old son has started a punk band...
Me:Oh cool, what are you called?

Son:Rape Kit(!)

Me:With an exclamation mark?
(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) (○¥○) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Fri 13 Jun 2025, 17:13, archived)

I got an email from Nextdoor earlier
With the subject line "Broomrape on Portsdown Hill". Before I found out it's the name of a plant, I had never seen such a jaw dropping headline.
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 13 Jun 2025, 17:18, archived)

"Broomrape seedlings put out a root-like growth, which attaches to the roots of nearby hosts. Once attached to a host, the broomrape robs its host of water and nutrients"
( theniwokeup has been awake since, Fri 13 Jun 2025, 21:42, archived)

ob ape
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Fri 13 Jun 2025, 21:54, archived)

oh fuck well worth the effort
to work out i mean, it doesn't look very difficult to type
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 14 Jun 2025, 0:58, archived)

Also, your son should rethink the band name

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 13 Jun 2025, 17:19, archived)

Yeah, they should drop the exclamation mark.

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Fri 13 Jun 2025, 17:28, archived)

Or go with something less contentious, like Jewish Hitler And The Spastic Fuckers.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Fri 13 Jun 2025, 17:30, archived)

Oh fucking well done Mr Tea
It's gonna take a lot of convincing to change his mind from this now😡
(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) (○¥○) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Fri 13 Jun 2025, 17:34, archived)

*doffs hat*

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Fri 13 Jun 2025, 18:48, archived)

alright John Peel

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 13 Jun 2025, 17:43, archived)

or "the Israeli government" as they're also known
LITTLEBITOFSATIRETHERE
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Fri 13 Jun 2025, 19:31, archived)

Just forget about Benjamin Netanyahu, you're never going to meet him.

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Fri 13 Jun 2025, 20:15, archived)

Benjamin Notanyahu

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Fri 13 Jun 2025, 20:50, archived)

Benjamin Notgonymeetu

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 13 Jun 2025, 21:58, archived)

Alright, Frankie Boyle.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Fri 13 Jun 2025, 20:30, archived)

SATIRETHERE HANNUKAHINMYLIFE
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Fri 13 Jun 2025, 20:35, archived)

Oh man, it's been an age since I've played Street Fighter II.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Fri 13 Jun 2025, 20:48, archived)

double dragon was where it was at

( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Fri 13 Jun 2025, 22:32, archived)

+ headed Bad

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Sat 14 Jun 2025, 9:04, archived)

that is a rubbish name for a band
it makes them sound like edgelord pricks
(inflation vore mpreg yaoi yuri bara, Fri 13 Jun 2025, 17:21, archived)

Edgelord Pricks!?
I'll suggest it
(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) (○¥○) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Fri 13 Jun 2025, 17:22, archived)

Heartburn and the Shits

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 13 Jun 2025, 17:23, archived)

I'm suffering heartburn, ooh ooh, and don't it feel shit!

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 13 Jun 2025, 17:53, archived)

they'd get more people coming to their gig if they called themselves 'Cancelled'

( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Fri 13 Jun 2025, 17:34, archived)

Culture?

(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) (○¥○) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Fri 13 Jun 2025, 17:37, archived)

I blame the parents

( Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Fri 13 Jun 2025, 17:36, archived)

b3ta.com/talk/8449885
(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) (○¥○) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Fri 13 Jun 2025, 17:45, archived)

Paedo and the Klaxons

( Cheers Cheers, Fri 13 Jun 2025, 17:37, archived)

Be right back
With a witty retort
(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) (○¥○) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Fri 13 Jun 2025, 17:38, archived)

gary glitter and the underage shitters

( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Fri 13 Jun 2025, 17:40, archived)

Turtle power!

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Fri 13 Jun 2025, 19:45, archived)

i nearly forgot that i think i saw them at wembley arena

( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Fri 13 Jun 2025, 18:01, archived)

Wembley arena Infest
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 13 Jun 2025, 18:03, archived)

oh yeah. i forgot that.

( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Fri 13 Jun 2025, 18:21, archived)

rock hyraxes do cube-shaped shits, that can't be comfy can it
also entire colonies piss and shit in one specific designated burrow for many generations
then the whole mess dries out over a long period of time
then people find it and dig it all up, it's kind of like rock at this point, and they sell it
and then the people who buy it grind it to powder and tincture it for maybe a year
and then it's used in expensive artisan perfumery
and then wealthy people put it on their skin
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 13 Jun 2025, 18:12, archived)

something else does cube shaped shits as well
recently read about it wasn't a rock hyrax so at least two animals do this
( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Fri 13 Jun 2025, 18:22, archived)

Wombat.

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Fri 13 Jun 2025, 18:25, archived)

my mortal enemy

( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Fri 13 Jun 2025, 18:25, archived)

build a wall to protect yourself, and use....

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 14 Jun 2025, 0:54, archived)

LOL
Period
(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) (○¥○) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Fri 13 Jun 2025, 18:25, archived)

Having an offensive name is so conformist when it comes to punk.
They should call themselves The Polite Gentlemen.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Fri 13 Jun 2025, 18:14, archived)

Yes! I like this idea
The Paper Doilies
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 13 Jun 2025, 18:27, archived)

After a lengthy discussion... the idiot child has agreed to
Charlie Chaplin did it first
(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) (○¥○) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Fri 13 Jun 2025, 18:26, archived)

Michael Knight might have something to say about that

(2 Can Chunder - Work account arbeit macht frei!, Fri 13 Jun 2025, 18:33, archived)

You bitch
Reverse cider snort
(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) (○¥○) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Fri 13 Jun 2025, 18:35, archived)

tarted a ed on his h b
( broadsword, Fri 13 Jun 2025, 21:21, archived)