Victor picks up the phone. A happy American voice barks into his ear "YOUNG MAN!!" "YOUNG?!?!" yells Victor. "YOUNG?? HOW DARE Y-" Victor looks at the phone. It is a puppy
( vladimir, Wed 13 May 2026, 11:55, archived)

+ A happy American puppy, who can talk.

(The Porcupine From Purgatory Ningles, mateyplops! How are the kids? *smoosh*, Wed 13 May 2026, 11:56, archived)

"WOOF WOOF WOOF" says the puppy
"What do you mean, woof woof woof," barks Victor. "you're supposed to be a phone"
"I mean," says the puppy, landing neatly on the floor and shaking itself from nose to tail in one tidy movement, "I mean, WOOF WOOF WOOF. And I note you're the one who's currently barking"
Victor turns puce
( vladimir, Wed 13 May 2026, 11:59, archived)

FOUR TWO NINE ONE!

(morning cheesy arse grease innit, Wed 13 May 2026, 12:01, archived)

Top YouTube comment on that clip:
Back when we had a sense of humour. Probably wouldn't be allowed these days, because of the woke community.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory Ningles, mateyplops! How are the kids? *smoosh*, Wed 13 May 2026, 12:05, archived)

I just burst out laughing aha oh god
( vladimir, Wed 13 May 2026, 12:10, archived)

I'm angry, and here's my shoehorn

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 13 May 2026, 13:17, archived)