afternoon

(morning Hairy biscuit!, Mon 17 Aug 2026, 12:49, archived)

FUCK YOU

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Mon 17 Aug 2026, 13:53, archived)

FUCK ME

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Mon 17 Aug 2026, 14:03, archived)

You could buy us a drink first, at least.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Mon 17 Aug 2026, 14:32, archived)

Fair enough. Cup of Tea, Mr. Tea?

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Mon 17 Aug 2026, 14:39, archived)

I'm on the beer already, ta.
*buuuuurp*
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Mon 17 Aug 2026, 15:00, archived)

Mr. Beer, that's my name, that name again is Mr. Beer.

( fross Read your email on, Mon 17 Aug 2026, 15:41, archived)

They call me Doctor Beer. Good morning, how are you? I'm Doctor Beer.

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 17 Aug 2026, 16:02, archived)

OH FUCK ME
They've put a load of freeze pops in the freezer so staff don't complain about the heat so much and a raspberry one has just exploded all over my white shirt and now my patients are gonna think some birds blobbed all over me or something
( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 17 Aug 2026, 16:06, archived)

lol, gutted

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Mon 17 Aug 2026, 16:11, archived)

“I’m afraid I’ve been shot but for reasons of national security I am required to still see patients.”

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 17 Aug 2026, 16:32, archived)

Are you interested in things?

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Mon 17 Aug 2026, 17:09, archived)

Well I'm certainly not interested in people

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 17 Aug 2026, 17:32, archived)

Are you a real doctor or are you a real beer, an actual beer?

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Mon 17 Aug 2026, 18:26, archived)

I live like a beer

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 17 Aug 2026, 18:49, archived)

Do you like to play the drums?

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Mon 17 Aug 2026, 18:51, archived)

You sure ask a lot of questions. You're not wearing a wire are you?

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 17 Aug 2026, 19:24, archived)

I don't believe he's wearing a single thread!
*monocle pops out*
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Mon 17 Aug 2026, 20:38, archived)

*helicopters*

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Mon 17 Aug 2026, 22:04, archived)

BRATISLAVA BEER TASTING MOFOS

( Cheers Cheers, Mon 17 Aug 2026, 16:58, archived)

Billy Gonnolly

(morning Hairy biscuit!, Mon 17 Aug 2026, 14:29, archived)

Gawn French
Jasper Carrotten
Grave Rhys-Jones
Craig Ch-Aaargh!-les
Harry Ain'tfield
Paul Whitehearse
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Mon 17 Aug 2026, 15:57, archived)

Adrian Deadmondson

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 17 Aug 2026, 17:33, archived)

Hale & Passed

( broadsword, Mon 17 Aug 2026, 17:38, archived)

Lack Dee

( Cheers Cheers, Mon 17 Aug 2026, 17:55, archived)

Ben Eltoff

( Cheers Cheers, Mon 17 Aug 2026, 17:55, archived)

alrite
still in canada for a few weeks, it's morning here, but ning all the same
( fross Read your email on, Mon 17 Aug 2026, 15:07, archived)

He died poor years later and was first buried in an unmarked grave.
How many is a poor? First burial is always the hardest.
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 17 Aug 2026, 16:04, archived)

In advanced number theory competitions, a "poor number" is a mathematical concept. A number n is defined as poor if there is no positive integer m where the factorial m! ends in exactly n trailing zeros. For example, 5 is the very first poor number because 24! has 4 trailing zeros, but 25! jumps straight to 6 trailing zeros (leaving 5 skipped).
( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Mon 17 Aug 2026, 18:49, archived)

punchy, low-brow quip

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Mon 17 Aug 2026, 18:51, archived)