Animal Farm!
I'll skip the "crumpled page of Razzle found on wasteground age 9" story and go straight for the 1 that remains burned into my memory. Forever.

Late 80's, age 12, rumours go around school of this tape. It's spoken of in hushed tones, no-ones ever seen it but it's said "people do it with animals". Everyone instantly wants to see it. As most things do, it was a mates older brother who got a copy. It's set, lunchtime and 7 of us leg it out of school grounds and over to his house. Mum and Dad at work so we can have the house to ourselves. Out comes the tape and it's stuck into the Ferguson. It seems to be a compilation of scenes, filmed at different times so it's all over the shop but we don't care, plot seems flimsy at best.

1st Scene = A small kitchen, pan of live eels. Yes, frying pan is out, they're making tea. she's finding it hard to hold on to it, no she's........... the room FREAKS and goes into hysterics! "You can see it's tail sticking out!!" Fast Forward.

2nd Scene = Woman/Man. Next to a fence. Hmm, yes, she's playing his trumpet. Oh look, a chicken's walking past, she's picked it up, she's ........ 1 of us laughs so hard he farts, the rest kind of sit quietly. Not as funny anymore. Chicken doesn't look overly pleased either. Fast forward.

3rd Scene... Now. It goes hazy here as we all started to think it wasn't the best idea, the bravado was gone. I remember 1 woman under a horse, she just looked desperate. Fast forward Then 2 women and a great dane. He didn't look too fussed either althought he did look like Scooby doo. Fast forward. A woman, going into a barn. Farmers wife, yes, she's feeding the pigs. No, she's not, she's getting one to ... fucking 'ell! it's a big pig too!

We were all massively let down by the experience, didn't live up to the hype. Lunchtime was nearly over *SLAM* back door goes, Lee's dad's home and it's FUCKING ANARCHY as we all try leave at once like burgulars, 1 out of the window, 4 thru the patio door, the rest get caught trying to take the tape out.

Back to school, out of breath, in a daze. We've now all shared that experience and head our seperate ways...
(TheManofScience, Wed 17 Aug 2011, 17:57, 30 replies)

I remember it well!
'Its impact on viewers was compared to that of hearing for the first time about the Kennedy assassination.'

That quote works for me. Saw it once and once only. Yet the images are seared into my brain forever. Unfortunately.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Animal_Farm_%28video%29
( Albert Marshmallow is a completely irredeemable cunt, Wed 17 Aug 2011, 18:02, closed)

Starring Bodil Joensen
Bodil Joensen or Bodil Jørgensen (25 September 1944 – 3 January 1985) was a Danish pornographic actress born in the village Hundige, near Copenhagen. An animal lover, she ran a small entrepreneurial farm and animal husbandry business, and enjoyed celebrity status from her many pornographic films in which she engaged in sex acts with animals.

An icon and celebrity for a time, with her own successful business, she failed to make the transition to movies when market sentiment changed and became impoverished, dependent on alcohol, stopped being able to care for her animals, and died some few years later. The love of her life was her dog, but friends comment she was very close to all animals, and before her decline cared deeply and affectionately for every type, from rabbits to pigs.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bodil_Joensen

Fucking hell
( enoughblueskyforsailorstrousers, Wed 17 Aug 2011, 20:49, closed)

^^This with brass knobs on^

( The Mock Turtle ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Thu 18 Aug 2011, 10:37, closed)

^^This with Labrador knobs on^
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Thu 18 Aug 2011, 10:58, closed)

I probably shouldn't admit this.
I would like to see that film. Anyone know where it can be found and where it's legal?
I'd explain my interest but I know nobody would beleive me anyhow.
(Me, I'm not... in any way intoxicated, Wed 17 Aug 2011, 18:14, closed)

Is it that you like fucking animals?

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Wed 17 Aug 2011, 18:21, closed)

Only badgers...

(Me, I'm not... in any way intoxicated, Wed 17 Aug 2011, 18:24, closed)

Haaahahaha haa haa ha ha ha!
No, really, go on, do. Explain this nebulous and unspecified - nay, seemingly unspecifiable - interest that you have in such a film, that is very hard to articulate to other people but is most certainly NOT to do with wanting to whack off to it!
(Falstaff's Spiritual Successor, Wed 17 Aug 2011, 19:10, closed)

It's a cultural icon.
I almost puked myself at "Two Girls One Cup" and "Faces Of Death" was pretty horrific. However, I am interested in the extremes of culture and things which are taboo.
I didn't bother to explain earlier because people jump to conclusions anyhow and I don't care whether my reasons are believed or not.
(Me, I'm not... in any way intoxicated, Wed 17 Aug 2011, 20:58, closed)

Huh. I was expecting more hedging
about your 'unspecified interest'.

Do you not think it's enough to see just a few of these things? I mean for e.g., I got bored with rotten.com pretty quickly in the end, despite the taboo thrill.
(Falstaff's Spiritual Successor, Wed 17 Aug 2011, 21:07, closed)

As far as I can tell it's a film where none of the performers are under duress, but it's demonised.
I'd like to see what it's illegal to even draw a picture of in my country of residence. Heck, I may even become an advocate for internet censorship, who knows?
(Me, I'm not... in any way intoxicated, Wed 17 Aug 2011, 21:25, closed)

I think you'll find it's illegal pretty much everywhere (except Denmark).
Bloody deviant. Still, as they say, if you build it, they will come... (and I'm sure you could google it up without too much trouble).
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 17 Aug 2011, 21:13, closed)

I'm aware that, for some reason, it's illegal most places.
Hence my question. Coincidentaly I may be in Denmark later this year, so if that's true it's worth remembering.
(Me, I'm not... in any way intoxicated, Wed 17 Aug 2011, 21:21, closed)

When you go through passport control, and they ask the purpose of your visit,
please make sure and answer honestly: "I'm here for the animal porn".
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 17 Aug 2011, 22:28, closed)

If/when I go I won't to through this "Passport Control" you speak of.
I'd probably state that on entering The Netherlands though.
(Me, I'm not... in any way intoxicated, Wed 17 Aug 2011, 22:35, closed)

Sneaking over the border, eh?
Illegal alien, and a sexual deviant. Anything else you want to own up to?
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 18 Aug 2011, 9:28, closed)

don't admit to having any Marmite though
('tin'tintin, Thu 18 Aug 2011, 14:40, closed)

saw the bit with the chicken
that was more than enough to put me off ever watching the rest of it.
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Wed 17 Aug 2011, 18:19, closed)

I, too, heard about this mythical film when I was a lad.
But I never got to see it. Having read your description, I'm rather glad. In what is, frankly, an unusual reaction for me, I don't want to see it. It sounds rather unpleasant and not arousing in the least.
( flake has nothing against your right leg, Wed 17 Aug 2011, 19:36, closed)

I'd always assumed it to be an urban legend,
as it was one of those things that everyone had heard of and no one had seen. Having read the wiki articles above, it's all rather sad, really.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 17 Aug 2011, 21:08, closed)

ahaha

(benito vaselini no not that one, Wed 17 Aug 2011, 20:25, closed)

We should have a QOTW about the weirdest deviant porn you've ever seen or heard of. I'm thinking "Me, I'm not..." will get front paged and/or arrested.

For me the weirdest porn I've ever heard of was a woman sticking a lobster in her fanny and holding a lighter to its head so it wiggled its tail about and gave her an orgasm. Bonus was they could presumably cook it and eat it after filming.

Some stories relate the lobster babies being laid in her womb at the time and her "giving birth" to some lobsters at a later date. Schoolboy stuff indeed.

If someone held a lighter to my head I'm pretty sure my reaction wouldn't be to give birth.

Christ I'm drunk.
( AWPS, Wed 17 Aug 2011, 21:29, closed)

as a teen i watched this film with deep regret with some friends
i left the room after about 10 mins and never talked about it to them again, i did find out later about 20 years later that one of my friends at the time had got in to animal porn in a big way and was regularly down loading the shit. how did i find out? i fixed his pc for him and did what every respectable fixer does, i looked for mp3's pic and porn and found his stash dirty filthy basterd had gigs of the stuff even stuff with pregnant women and animals .
told him it needed formating and wiped the everything
( fluffybunnykiller Is feasting on the clitoris of life, Wed 17 Aug 2011, 21:48, closed)

Peer Censorship ftw!
I bet he was gutted like a fish...
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Thu 18 Aug 2011, 9:10, closed)

That explains
a clip someone sent me years ago. It showed a woman with curly brown hair giving a blowjob to a horse, and then vomiting up the horse jizz. Made me feel ill for a few days.

Then a few days later another friend sent me a pic titled "Lunchtime" which showed a woman shitting into a man's mouth. Again, it made me feel queasy for days.

So I did the only logical thing- I sent them both the one that the other had sent.
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Wed 17 Aug 2011, 21:56, closed)

Way back in the mists of time
Having a stop over at my best friends house, her hubby announced he had brought a copy of this from work.
After us both declining to watch we went up to our beds, leaving him to 'just have a quick look' to see if it was as bad as he'd heard.
The next morning we asked if it was and he replied that yes it was the most disgusting and stomach churning thing he'd ever seen.
When asked how much he had managed to watch, he replied with a cheery air 'oh all of it'
I didnt ask the obvious question but could never look at him in the same way afterwards
(insomniac-surfer oh go on then, just this once, Thu 18 Aug 2011, 1:22, closed)

It wasn't a very enjoyable experience watching this
A friend watched it one evening and brought it back to its owner at work the next day.
"Pretty gross, eh?" we asked.
"Yeah. It wasn't too bad, but when it got to the bit with one bloke giving another bloke one up the arse, I had to fast forward to the scene with the mice and the tube up the woman's fanny...".

Because that would have been so much more bearable?
(Kliper Filllets Getting noticed by twats on the internet since, Thu 18 Aug 2011, 7:51, closed)

Bearable? I don't remember bears

(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Thu 18 Aug 2011, 14:56, closed)

Assuming it's the same film I was shown by a squaddy friend ...
... you forgot to mention the fact that the woman takes a SHIT in the pan of eels after she's, ahem, 'done with them,' and the whole lot gets cooked up.

Aaaah, Bisto.
( Wet-chinned bag shanker Cannot parse Wogan, Thu 18 Aug 2011, 11:08, closed)

saw this
Once at a toga party i went to in my teens. Grim doesn't begin to describe it and the experience wasn't helped by someone hooking up a microphone to the video and doing his own commentary
(andythepieman Is surfing the waves of indifference on, Thu 18 Aug 2011, 15:20, closed)