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# BUT IT'S DOGS PLAYING POKER
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 20:26, archived)
# ok, who ordered the 5 fish pizzas?
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 20:29, archived)
# Happy candle day
I did say it down there but can't be bothered scrolling down
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 20:29, archived)
# ta!
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 20:31, archived)
# pretty much bindun this ^

(, Sat 7 May 2011, 22:52, archived)
# Flaming monkey!
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 20:36, archived)
# isn't that a cocktail?
if it isn't, it should be
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 20:40, archived)
# Here's a candle you can blow.
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 20:48, archived)
# arf!
that'd scorch the hairs right off!
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 20:53, archived)
# Have you got a moustache then...!!
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 20:57, archived)
# yes
but i'm blonde, nobody can see it
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:01, archived)
# I might start telling people that I'm not going bald then....
I'm hair's is just turning blond..!
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:06, archived)
# hahaha!
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:08, archived)
# .
hairs nipples
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 20:57, archived)
# hairy nipples
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 20:58, archived)
# Bearded tit
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:01, archived)
# what, rory mcgrath?
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:04, archived)
# I had a girlfriend with hairy nipples.... it didn't last....
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:02, archived)
# you can floss and suck
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:04, archived)
# Ahahahaha
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:15, archived)
# Eeek...The memory of it is making me cringe...!
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:23, archived)
# Sounds good to me!
www.idrink.com/v.html?id=33598
Edit: but I was actually referring to this: www.imdb.com/title/tt0514513/
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 20:55, archived)
# fuck, that sounds nice
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:02, archived)
# It sure is . . . bear with the advert . . .
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:05, archived)
# bloody hell, i'd collapse if i drank those!
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:09, archived)
# Have a smashing candle day.....
Sorry it's crap I just threw it together in seconds because I forgot to do you something decent....
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 20:52, archived)
# 0_0
my, that's a big one!
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 20:53, archived)
# a line i hear most often
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 20:54, archived)
# You too eh?
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 20:56, archived)
# we're total studs
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 20:58, archived)
# {:-)
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:01, archived)
# yo check it
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:20, archived)
# Heh heh
As a King Missile and Half-man Half-biscuit fan I approve.
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:33, archived)
# yeah, i'll bet
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:03, archived)
# Don't forget that all candles must be out befor twelve....!
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 20:56, archived)
# *blows*
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:04, archived)
# Well you don't want it dripping on the carpet....
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:09, archived)
# that happened once
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:10, archived)
# On a first night at a ladies house....
She had one of those enclosed oil insence things with a tealight inside....

It got so hot it boiled the wax over and the whole thing set on fire....

I knelt on the floor in front of it and blew as hard as I could....

Only to have my naked bady showered with burning wax and covering the carpet as well.... and the bloody thing was still in flames....

It destroyed the mood somewhat...
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:19, archived)
# Literally . . . too hot to handle !
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:24, archived)
# I'v never wanted another woman in my life for length of time I'd wanted her....
Years I'd pined for her

All ruined by a sodding candle....!!!
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:38, archived)
# hahahaha!
sharing a flat with my mate. she'd had a new carpet fitted 2 days before. she left for work, leaving me on the couch with the flu, delirious and hallucinating. she came home to find i'd spent the day making wax lollipops by dipping matches into melted candlewax. there was wax all over the new carpet. she says the worst thing was knowing i had no idea what i'd been doing and, as i was sick, she couldn't yell at me! :D
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:25, archived)
# It is difficult to get the wax off . . .
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:28, archived)
# kitchen roll and a warm iron
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:30, archived)
# You are truly a wealth of knowledge !
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:32, archived)
# i'm from a very practical family
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:41, archived)
# Hahaha class...!!
One of the funniest I ever saw was.....

Sat at a friends house, another friend turn up pissed out of his head...

He walked in, put his hand on top of the TV to steady himself, the TV fell of its stand, he fell on top of the TV, spilling an entire tray of peas and chips on top of it, he tried to get up, and then projectile vomited all over the top of it as well....

Amazingly it still worked after...
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:34, archived)
# eeeeewwww
green screen!
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:41, archived)
# That reminds me . . . you can have your cake and wear it too !
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 20:57, archived)
# hahaha
fantastic
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 20:58, archived)
# :D-PARTY!
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 20:59, archived)
# Pffft
Mnnnnnggh
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 20:59, archived)
# Eye see she's chewing nuts....!!
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:01, archived)
# arf!
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:03, archived)
# :D
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:08, archived)
# Here's a haiku for the occasion
Good at drawing fish,
Smash Monkey is quick-witted
Happy b3ta day
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 20:57, archived)
# ooo, ta!
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:04, archived)
# Happycakecatcandle day :D
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:05, archived)
# pattycattycake!
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:11, archived)
# What he liked to do on his night off....!!
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 20:55, archived)
# hold on hold on
jebus has 3 aces and so does that dog!

someone is cheating
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 20:57, archived)
# he is not the messiah
he's a very naughty boy
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 20:59, archived)
# SHENANIGANS!
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 21:02, archived)
# Dead Man's Hand
(, Sat 7 May 2011, 20:58, archived)