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[challenge entry] Who doesn't have a swordfish as a pet?

From the Movie Pets challenge. See all 79 entries (open)

(I helped save b3ta! tinglto 3 sheets to the wind, Mon 21 Jul 2025, 19:50, archived)
# Can anyone help?
I am looking for the source of the following (might be Python or Two Ronnies). "Tonight's ploy was tipped on the tapwritter by Janet our new socrotary and so may have a few spilling mistakes but we can't sack her as she has dig knackers".
(I helped save b3ta! tinglto 3 sheets to the wind, Mon 21 Jul 2025, 20:10, archived)
# Looks like Ronnie Barker
could also be Roy Hudd or Barry Cryer, maybe for Eric & Ernie, they did plays, didn't theys.

Anyway here's a film of Keir Starmer working out with his Persian clubs.
(I helped save b3ta! brb Monkhouse Stampede, Mon 21 Jul 2025, 20:33, archived)
# Arthur Bostrom?
(sticklebrlcks that's Mr Bricks to you šŸŽ, Mon 21 Jul 2025, 20:45, archived)
# Thanks. It does sound like him but I don't think it was from 'Ello 'Ello.
(I helped save b3ta! tinglto 3 sheets to the wind, Mon 21 Jul 2025, 21:29, archived)
# Sounds very much like Ronnie Barker/Gerald Wiley written Two Ronnies sketch...
(I helped save b3ta! Happosai _,,,,_(O ; o)_,,,, Mon 21 Jul 2025, 22:39, archived)
# I don't think it was Ronnie B or the Pythons
but it could well be Rutland Weekend Television
(I helped save b3ta! JustHere4Coffee remembers when all o' this were car parks, Tue 22 Jul 2025, 3:05, archived)
# Ronnie B and the Pythons sounds like a shit rock band
(sticklebrlcks that's Mr Bricks to you šŸŽ, Tue 22 Jul 2025, 7:44, archived)
# I was going to add the possibility of it coming from radio's Round the Horne.
The only thing is that it refers to 'tonight' which makes sense with the Two Ronnies but I suspect RTH may have been a lunchtime show (not sure).
(Mehitabel_Itrang, Tue 22 Jul 2025, 8:20, archived)
# I think even knackers
would have been a bit beyond the pale for that era of The Light Program.
(I helped save b3ta! JustHere4Coffee remembers when all o' this were car parks, Wed 23 Jul 2025, 0:41, archived)
# Fair point, it does sound like Nows at Ton meets Pismonuncers Unanimous
(Mehitabel_Itrang, Wed 23 Jul 2025, 6:42, archived)
# that was Russell Brand m8
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Tue 22 Jul 2025, 8:29, archived)
# Helpful answers.. wtf.. this place HAS changed..
In my day "What are we your IMDB cunts?" Would have been the standard response, and we turned out alright didn't we?
(I helped save b3ta! R2Dtard LIFT the Epstein FUCKS Immediately!, Tue 22 Jul 2025, 8:30, archived)
# I googled it for him
Looks like the source is b3ta.com/board
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Tue 22 Jul 2025, 8:34, archived)
# Oh No!
We're trapped in a loop in the space-time continuum!
(davyclam, Tue 22 Jul 2025, 12:01, archived)
# The cheap innuendo screams Ronnie Barker.
But the part about the play makes me think Morecambe and Wise.
(I helped save b3ta! jonbob loves you, Tue 22 Jul 2025, 10:15, archived)
# Adding Les Dawson as a wildcard
Do I win a prize?
(I helped save b3ta! Dick Wonder ā‚ wā‚’ā‚™ā‚–y, wā‚įµ„y wā‚’ā‚™dā‚‘įµ£, Tue 22 Jul 2025, 11:42, archived)
# Happy to provide a prize to whoever gets it subject to Ts and Cs.
(I helped save b3ta! tinglto 3 sheets to the wind, Tue 22 Jul 2025, 13:24, archived)
# twats and cunts?
(I helped save b3ta! Dick Wonder ā‚ wā‚’ā‚™ā‚–y, wā‚įµ„y wā‚’ā‚™dā‚‘įµ£, Tue 22 Jul 2025, 13:30, archived)
[challenge entry]
9C1
(I helped save b3ta! Jabberwoc misses D.R. and Quinch, Mon 21 Jul 2025, 23:45, archived)
# Hahaha!
(I helped save b3ta! spazzcaptain Misses Valin @, Tue 22 Jul 2025, 11:14, archived)
# Alright, Spazz!
(I helped save b3ta! Jabberwoc misses D.R. and Quinch, Tue 22 Jul 2025, 16:54, archived)