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# Beautious New Year
My car has made a decision to die of clutch death....last night on the duel carrage way about 30 min from home.
I then phoned the RAC but they are shite and took three hours to get me home..so no bed till 2 am and then couldnt sleep due to fucking cold and lack of heating....am now at work but feeling shite
oh and I still have to speak to the guy from upstairs at work whose car I mashed last year
....things can only get better....(thanks D:Ream)

2003 Resoulutions.....

...take the bus to work.



that is all for now
(Squishie, Mon 6 Jan 2003, 10:19, archived)
# I suffered a washing-up injury on saturday
perhaps I should resolve not to do any more washing up.
(I helped save b3ta! Craymen, Mon 6 Jan 2003, 10:21, archived)
# paper plates
they are the future.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Drink, Mon 6 Jan 2003, 10:22, archived)
# Still dangerous
have you never heard of paper cuts man?

Morning and huzzah! for Saturday mate.
(I helped save b3ta! Ijon Tichy, Mon 6 Jan 2003, 10:29, archived)
# plastic plates then
safety first.
(martian, Mon 6 Jan 2003, 10:30, archived)
# they
can shatter
(Squishie, Mon 6 Jan 2003, 10:32, archived)
# ...and plastic cups.
I was washing a pint glass, it broke underwater while I had my hand inside I got cut about 5 times.

It took bloody ages to stop bleeding.
(I helped save b3ta! Craymen, Mon 6 Jan 2003, 10:33, archived)
# ouch!
nasty.
(martian, Mon 6 Jan 2003, 10:38, archived)
# from now on
I shall eat with my fingers directly off the dining room table, and drink from the tap.

That way I won't have do do any washing up again.
(I helped save b3ta! Craymen, Mon 6 Jan 2003, 10:46, archived)
# why not put everything in a blender
and drink it through a straw?
(martian, Mon 6 Jan 2003, 10:49, archived)
# as long as you don't cook anything
(I helped save b3ta! new_matt, Mon 6 Jan 2003, 10:49, archived)
# Shirley
after the first cut, you might've thought it was a good idea to take your hands out of the bowl..?
(I helped save b3ta! Ijon Tichy, Mon 6 Jan 2003, 10:46, archived)
# sorry to borrow this
but the woman who sits behind me is fucking wittering on and on and on and on and it's doing my head in.

right, you can have it back now...
(I helped save b3ta! new_matt, Mon 6 Jan 2003, 10:22, archived)
# Just
hit her....hard
(Squishie, Mon 6 Jan 2003, 10:25, archived)
# nutting her in the nose
is always an option
(I helped save b3ta! M@rkoni, Mon 6 Jan 2003, 10:29, archived)
# and
it is bound to make you smile...


..violence - the way forward
(Squishie, Mon 6 Jan 2003, 10:31, archived)
# but it has to be educated violence
i.e. you cause the person pain whist making it look like an accident
(I helped save b3ta! M@rkoni, Mon 6 Jan 2003, 10:32, archived)
# clever
very very clever
(Squishie, Mon 6 Jan 2003, 10:33, archived)
# ha ha
other people's misery makes me laugh.

(I helped save b3ta! Monkeyboy, Mon 6 Jan 2003, 10:22, archived)
# Yes...
..but my own does not....
(Squishie, Mon 6 Jan 2003, 10:24, archived)
# But think about the happiness....
...you are giving others.
(I helped save b3ta! Mystery_Bob, Mon 6 Jan 2003, 10:25, archived)
# err
...thought....
...but no, still feel shite

happiness is a mild cigar...especially when you dont smoke
(Squishie, Mon 6 Jan 2003, 10:26, archived)