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# Good news, everyone!
everyone!

I've invented a device which causes you to read this in your head in my voice!
(I helped save b3ta! ivystopia Last seen on, Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:17, archived)
# Stop stealing jokes from 4chan
(I helped save b3ta! Lightguy hail satan, Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:19, archived)
# Well
I never said it was my joke. Everyone's probably seen it on Digg anyway.
(I helped save b3ta! ivystopia Last seen on, Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:20, archived)
# so why post it here too
in a new thread?
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:24, archived)
#
(I helped save b3ta! thiswasmyclone, Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:28, archived)
# A man seeking to join an East Texas Sheriff's Department is being interviewed.
The Deputy doing the interview says: "Your qualifications all look good, but there is "an attitude suitability test" that you must take before you can be accepted."

Then, sliding a service pistol across the desk, he says:

"Take this pistol and go out and shoot six illegal aliens, six meth dealers, six Arab extremists, and a rabbit. "

"Why the rabbit?"

"Great attitude," says the Sergeant. "When can you start?"
(I helped save b3ta! M3Essential and The Essentials. LIVE!, Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:21, archived)
# haha
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:25, archived)
# :D
(I helped save b3ta! Shada, Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:19, archived)
# Good Lord!!
It's true!!
(Seance Trumpet has got no beef with a man enjoying a croissant, Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:19, archived)
# It works!
Can you hear me thinking "What did you shop?"
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs ๐Ÿฆ‡ ↓ dn สŽษส sแด‰ษฅส‡ ↓๐Ÿฆ‡, Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:19, archived)
# I think
he made his tongue redder.
(Seance Trumpet has got no beef with a man enjoying a croissant, Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:20, archived)
# I misread that
as "I think he made it with his head dobber"
(I helped save b3ta! Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:28, archived)
# We used to have one of those
but the handle fell off.
(Seance Trumpet has got no beef with a man enjoying a croissant, Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:29, archived)
# Don't post unshopped stuff
And stuff that's been on Digg and 4chan is, by definition, shit
(I helped save b3ta! The Coast Of Yemen, Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:21, archived)
# Doesn't work
I said it outloud.

That's what you get when you use the pirate version.
(I helped save b3ta! NinjaBadger hides in the bushes and gives you TB., Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:22, archived)
# yes
and fuck off
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:24, archived)
# good news everybody
as well as being able to post massive images above the recommended file size, steal images from the net and have them front-paged you can also tell tedious jokes garnered from elsewhere and accompany them with a picture you took from google.
b3ta is moving with the times.
(I helped save b3ta! Pasanonic 's been known to cause insanity in laboratory mice, Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:25, archived)
# HUZZAH!!
what a sad fucking state of affairs
(I helped save b3ta! M3Essential and The Essentials. LIVE!, Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:28, archived)
# In fairness
given the sheer number and diversiy of people who post here, it all goes surprisingly well I think. If things go badly wrong they usually get fixed.
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha โ”( ห˜_ห˜)โ”Œ ส…(ฬโ—กโ—)สƒ, Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:52, archived)
# This!
(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:54, archived)
# Front paged?
(__, Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:28, archived)
# I haven't been privvy to all the drama
but I gather that something was frontpaged at some point that some people didn't like. That's my understanding of the situation.
(Seance Trumpet has got no beef with a man enjoying a croissant, Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:34, archived)
# I posted an animation in repsonse to something in the small hours.
It got clicked a lot, and a failmod FP'd it, despite it clearly being on "randome.es".

Then, people got upset, and then invented things that never happened.

Apparently, I posted a small version, and then when it was FP'd I swapped it for a huge version. What a cunt I am eh?
(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:37, archived)
# Damn I missed this.
Is it ok if I get angry about it now? Or should I wait for another opportunity to foam at the mouth?
(I helped save b3ta! mofaha โ”( ห˜_ห˜)โ”Œ ส…(ฬโ—กโ—)สƒ, Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:41, archived)
# Wait until it appears in Thursday's Daily Mail
then write to your MP about it.
(Seance Trumpet has got no beef with a man enjoying a croissant, Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:42, archived)
# Perhaps wait until Pasanonic invents another tale of woe?
Or, you could get upset at something I *actually* did involving a 7mb 1x1 pixel image that went completely un-noticed.
(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:43, archived)
# failmod
hahahaha
(I helped save b3ta! M3Essential and The Essentials. LIVE!, Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:43, archived)
# It was probably cr3. He's been slacking off lately, making radio controlled CCTV landrovers.
(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:44, archived)
# To be fair
that's a noble endeavour.
(Seance Trumpet has got no beef with a man enjoying a croissant, Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:46, archived)
# He also won't let me have a dynamic sig line :-(
He's so mean to me.
(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:48, archived)
# The delusion gets worse!
I wonder if he's autistic maybe?
(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:35, archived)
# You know what I think is great?
The way that people are complaining that this whole thread is pointless and shit, and in doing so are making the thread longer and more attention-grabbing.
(Seance Trumpet has got no beef with a man enjoying a croissant, Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:26, archived)
# good for you.
You'll fit right in with the new b3ta /4chan
(I helped save b3ta! Pasanonic 's been known to cause insanity in laboratory mice, Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:28, archived)
# wut

(Seance Trumpet has got no beef with a man enjoying a croissant, Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:29, archived)
# ah - you've noticed that
good.
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:28, archived)
# hahaha

and fuck off
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Mon 26 Jan 2009, 18:45, archived)