"I'm sure you'll agree it's been a very emotional day for everyone concerned, and as you can see, even the cake is in tiers"
(,
Wed 25 Feb 2009, 16:40,
archived)
"Picture if you will tomorrow morning, the morning after this wonderful day.
XXXXX will wake up next to Mrs. XXXXXX and ring up to order breakfast.
For himself he'll order the full english breakfast: Bacon, Sausage, Fried Bread, Eggs, Tomatos, Mushrooms, Hash Browns, served with a huge mug of Tea.
Looking down at his newlywed wife, he'll just ask for a single Carrot for her.
When asked on the other end of the phone why just a single carrot for his wife, he'll answer ' I want to see if she eats like a rabbit as well'..."
(,
Wed 25 Feb 2009, 16:45,
archived)
XXXXX will wake up next to Mrs. XXXXXX and ring up to order breakfast.
For himself he'll order the full english breakfast: Bacon, Sausage, Fried Bread, Eggs, Tomatos, Mushrooms, Hash Browns, served with a huge mug of Tea.
Looking down at his newlywed wife, he'll just ask for a single Carrot for her.
When asked on the other end of the phone why just a single carrot for his wife, he'll answer ' I want to see if she eats like a rabbit as well'..."
Except wishing it would be brief
(,
Wed 25 Feb 2009, 16:48,
archived)
there were 130 guests. Using that gag above took balls of steel. Was quite a good experience though, I've since written a few more
for mates etc, as it is a nerve racking thing!
(,
Wed 25 Feb 2009, 16:49,
archived)
for mates etc, as it is a nerve racking thing!
too many air-pockets, and anyway, it's off"
(,
Wed 25 Feb 2009, 16:55,
archived)
or do you want to sig my forehead?
(,
Wed 25 Feb 2009, 16:43,
archived)
from then on, it's easy. They'll all go away and use that gag then
(,
Wed 25 Feb 2009, 16:47,
archived)
*best man gets out cue-cards*
I'm giving this speech on this wonderful day at the request of a very good friend of mine and yours. A close, reliable friend, a wonderful example to us all, a morally upstanding, highly intellectual, and thoroughly nice chap. To top it all off he's 3 times world motor racing champion..."
*look of confusion*
*drops cards, takes out smaller pile*
"sorry about the mix up, this is a rented tux."
"Steve's a bastard, but he's my mate. Let's drink".
(,
Wed 25 Feb 2009, 16:53,
archived)
I'm giving this speech on this wonderful day at the request of a very good friend of mine and yours. A close, reliable friend, a wonderful example to us all, a morally upstanding, highly intellectual, and thoroughly nice chap. To top it all off he's 3 times world motor racing champion..."
*look of confusion*
*drops cards, takes out smaller pile*
"sorry about the mix up, this is a rented tux."
"Steve's a bastard, but he's my mate. Let's drink".
