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This is a question Where Did It All Go Wrong?

Woocfot asks: Tell us all about that turning point in your life when it started going downhill. Yeah, that drunken conversation with my dad when he suggested I become a civil servant. Dammit, I could have been an astronaut

(, Thu 28 Feb 2013, 11:32)
Pages: Popular, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1

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It all went wrong QUIZ
It all went wrong for who or what when...

Bernard Butler left
John Nathan-Turner took over as producer
they let Joel Schumacher direct
he went electric
they changed the name to Snickers
Jonathan Ross took over as host
they cast Pierce Brosnan
Phil Collins took over as lead singer
he let his Californian wife join the band
he called that woman a bigot
they answered that distress call (several possible answers)
Robin Bailey replaced Arthur Lowe in the title role
Stephen Greif wasn't available so they cast Brian Croucher
Briana Corrigan left
a bloke fucked a monkey
all their specially tuned guitars and shit was nicked
they decided to rebrand it and reduce the alcohol content to 4.8% in order to 'offer the customer clarity'
they privatised it (many possible answers)
he didn't get a second series
they decided to make a fourth movie almost 20 years after the previous one
they made Paddy McGuire a sympathetic character after two series of him being a terrifying psychopath
Terry Bickers left the band (he's since rejoined, hurrah!)
Fred Freiberger took over as director (two answers)

That'll do for now though I can probably think of loads more... as can you.

Answers on a postcard please.

[Awaiting inevitable November 1991 jibes. Oh you cards!]
(, Sat 2 Mar 2013, 21:06, 64 replies)
Hmmmm
"It all went wrong for me when I thought James Bond got shit with the casting of Pierce Brosnan, I clearly forgot how fucking abysmal Timothy Dalton was"
- Dr. Skagra
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 0:01, closed)
*slow golf clap*
Well played Sir.
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 5:06, closed)

He's forgetting George Lazenby
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 12:24, closed)
Best. Bond. EVER.
Apart from Peter Sellers that darkie kid out of The Double Deckers of course.
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 19:47, closed)
Thanks
for presuming to know my mind, but Dalton RULED. Bond in order from best to worst goes: Connery, Craig, Moore, Dalton, Lazenby, Brosnan.
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 12:51, closed)
Moore THIRD???
For fuck's sake
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 15:14, closed)
nigga be trollin yo

(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 15:16, closed)
No
just my opinion, you tit.
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 18:09, closed)
Sorry
but yeah, IMO.
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 18:09, closed)
Wrong.
Connery
Craig
Dalton
Moore
Lazenby
Brosnan
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 18:09, closed)
More or less the same as me
at least we agree on Brosnan.
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 18:10, closed)
Yep. Only difference is I think dalton was better than Moore.

(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 18:43, closed)
I'm gonna spoil it for some of you.
John Nathan-Turner took over as producer - Dr. Who.
they let Joel Schumacher direct - Batman?
he let his Californian wife join the band - Wings.
a bloke fucked a monkey - HIV
he didn't get a second series - Joss Whedon, Firefly.
they made Paddy McGuire a sympathetic character after two series of him being a terrifying psychopath - Shameless (the proper 1 not the sad Merkin shitfuck. William H. Macy what the fuck did you think you were doing?)
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 5:13, closed)
All correct
apart from the band - I was thinking of The Fall, but it applies to Wings as well.

Second series - Alan Partridge.
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 12:57, closed)
*coconut halves*

(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 9:23, closed)
He went electric
Bob Dylan?
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 12:25, closed)
Yes
new album is great though
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 12:58, closed)
I may know a few...
I think: The Snickers one is Marathon
The Jonathon Ross one is about some telly show
The Phil Collins one may be Genesis
Might have been Gordon Brown calling that woman a bigot
The distress call could be Red Dwarf or Alien or Star Wars or something
The alcohol content may be Stella, I recently discovered that they had nerfed it
With the fourth movie one all I can think of is Die Hard.

I could be wrong but I think I've got a few right.
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 12:42, closed)
All correct
J Ross indeed a telly show but which?
Distress call is one of those
4th movie could be Die Hard 4.0 but I was thinking of something far worse
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 13:00, closed)

Jonathon Ross took over from Barry Norman presenting the cinema review program "Film (insert year)"

Privatisation could be British Telecom, British Gas, bits of the NHS, bits of Royal Mail and British Rail, basically anything owned by the public that could be legally stolen from the public and control sold to companies run by ex politicians, friends of politicians and political investors with only a token gesture of public share allowance to the great unwashed to make it less obvious.
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 15:56, closed)
more guesses
Bernard butler- suede.
jonathon ross- that film review thing?
Blake's 7
Indiana jones and the shit alien
freiberger- shitrek
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 14:29, closed)
Yep
but Freiberger also ruined Space 1999
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 18:03, closed)
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(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 14:55, closed)
The stolen guitars one is Sonic Youth.

(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 17:08, closed)

Sonic Youth Star Wars
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 17:39, closed)
Dr Shambolic
You are a twat and a bore. Note: a twat. Not a cunt, you don't deserve that, you are merely a twat, a tit, a twirling spunkledite, fluff, foam, detritus, leavings, spillings, to be swept away and forgotten. Your ridiculous, unfunny username peppers this site like Kaposi's sarcoma sores on the ass of an AIDS patient. Are you trying to 'win' the internet? If so can't we just say 'well done Dr Shambles! You've won!' so you'd just fuck off? I doubt that would work, because you incontinently crave attention like a mewling shit-nappied new-born baby. Therefore, I really should ignore you, because indifference is the wisest option with self-obsessed knobshiners such as yourself. I, however, am not particularly wise, hence this ill-advised diatribe. But hey, what else is the internet for, if not ill-advised diatribes?

That said, I do not wish death on you, or wish to see your nearest and dearest perish in a house fire as you look on sobbing. Or have them look on sobbing as you die writhing and screaming of cancer. That shit is for amateurs! It's too easy, on the internet, to go over the top, to go for the most shocking insult. That's not my style! I wish you and yours a long and happy life!

There's just one thing I'd like you to do. One simple thing.

Turn your computer off (if you can) and go outside (again, if you can). Go to your nearest supermarket, if they will let a dribbler like you in, and purchase a big jar of pickled onions. The biggest jar you can find. If you can locate a catering-sized jar, that's great! If you can only find small jars, purchase three or four. Don't worry about the brand - it's quantity we're after. Whilst in the supermarket, feel free to make any sundry purchases you might require. Why not? Go nuts! Even have a cup of tea and a slice of cake in their 'restaurant.' In fact, I insist you do this, and enjoy it too. Tea and cake! What's not to love?

When you get back home with your purchases, please put them all away except for the jar(s) of pickled onions. These, I want you to open. Then, I want you to undo your belt (or braces, I can see you as a braces man, fat and sweaty) and take off your trousers. Then remove your underwear (somehow, I visualise off-white boxer shorts adorned with faded skidmarks). You may wish to kick off your shoes and socks as well. Or go totally naked! Hey, it's your house (or bedsit, I reckon), so what you get up to is your own business! No-one will see! Knock yourself out.

Then I want you to go to the jar(s) of pickled onions, take out a single pickled onion, and insert it up your ass. Right up, as far as it can go. Then, take another, and do the same. Right up. As far as it can go. Then, take another, and another, and do the same, until the jar(s) is(are) empty.

Will you do this one small thing for me?

Thanks in advance for your co-operation.
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 18:06, closed)

whatever you just said

star wars
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 18:35, closed)
Pickled
onions.
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 18:40, closed)
An almost perfect post...
but the wrong target. Shambolic occasionally posts something vaguely interesting. BraynDead, on the other hand, truly is utterly fucking useless.
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 21:50, closed)
It upsets me when Doctors fight.

(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 18:45, closed)
Sorry
but he started it
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 19:17, closed)
Well you shouldn't have put everybody on 2.0 then.

(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 19:32, closed)
I don't even know
what 2.0 even is, nor do I care. I don't block people or delete posts either.

Though I have been tempted to do the latter...
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 20:41, closed)
tl;dr
summary please
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 19:19, closed)
Darth Vader is Luke's father.
Shit happens.
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 19:20, closed)
Twat is twat
I want him to shove many pickled onions up his ass.
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 21:29, closed)
Onions can make you cry

(, Mon 4 Mar 2013, 12:28, closed)
HA HA HA upset at the internet

(, Mon 4 Mar 2013, 11:27, closed)
i am now imagining
him shooting a cat with anally-propelled pickled onions.
it's making me giggle quite a bit.
(, Mon 4 Mar 2013, 14:40, closed)
Yep
Wondered if anyone would get that.
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 18:03, closed)
Alien
4th fillum was Alien Resurrection
Although I like it better than the shite that was Alien 2
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 19:22, closed)
Nope
I hope you mean Alien 3!

(Which I prefer)
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 19:54, closed)
Aliens.
"Game over, man."
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 22:53, closed)
Brianna Corrigan...
left The Beautiful South and was replaced by Joanne Abbott.
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 20:03, closed)
Bing!
Correct. Except 'twas Jacqui Abbott.
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 20:35, closed)
And they're still going
www.thesouth.co.uk/
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 20:42, closed)
Strictly Speaking......
.they're not quite. I saw Paul Heaton supporting Squeeze as a solo act in November. The South sounded pretty damn' good when I saw them too, though, but not quite the same without the laconic Mr H on vocals.
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 21:35, closed)
4th Movie?
No idea, but you're right about Dr Shamb0ll0cks.
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 21:26, closed)
Think
fear of serpents
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 21:27, closed)
Everything alright......
.....in The House of Love, Mr Bickers?
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 21:30, closed)
And.....
Robin Bailey replaced Arthur Lowe in Potter.
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 21:33, closed)
Y
es
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 22:35, closed)
Yes
indeedy
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 22:35, closed)
I was thinking Levitation rather than House of Love.

(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 21:58, closed)
Levitation sucked
after Bickers.

Listen to Bedlam... fucking amazing
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 22:36, closed)
"Meanwhile Gardens" *with* Bickers
is a great listen, mind.
(, Wed 6 Mar 2013, 11:23, closed)
Correct
They have a new album out soon, She Paints Words In Red
(, Sun 3 Mar 2013, 22:34, closed)
Good-uh post-uh....
I know the post Brix stuff was not as good as that released prior to her joining, but at the time he really did need a kick in the arse and a bit of a change in direction which she clearly inspired.

As for Bernard Butler I think he is overly credited for Suede being at the forefront of the early 90s zeitgeist for an English guitar band; the Oakes era was worse due to fame, familiarity and drugs rather than the guitarist's inspiration. I think Butler left at the right time for him.

Bickers though - spot on.
(, Mon 4 Mar 2013, 9:45, closed)
Stephen Greif / Brian Croucher is Blake's 7, of course.
Bad, but personally I hold to the more traditional view that it all went wrong when Blake left.

I read a great interview with Jacqueline Pearce (Servelan) - she said that when she turned up for series 4, and her character was now called Sleer, she thought it was part of the breakdown she'd been having over the summer and didn't say anything about it!
(, Mon 4 Mar 2013, 12:44, closed)
That's brilliant
Jacqueline is one of my fave people ever.
(, Mon 4 Mar 2013, 13:12, closed)
It all went wrong for Suede when they formed, wrote some songs, recorded then released them.
Whiny shitcunt gaylords for student bedwetters.
(, Tue 5 Mar 2013, 17:47, closed)
Answers if anyone still cares
Bernard Butler left - SUEDE
John Nathan-Turner took over as producer - DR WHO
they let Joel Schumacher direct - BATMAN
he went electric - DYLAN
they changed the name to Snickers - MARATHON
Jonathan Ross took over as host - FILM (INSERT YEAR)
they cast Pierce Brosnan - BOND
Phil Collins took over as lead singer - GENESIS
he let his Californian wife join the band - THE FALL
he called that woman a bigot - GORDON BROWN
they answered that distress call (several possible answers) - ALIENS
Robin Bailey replaced Arthur Lowe in the title role - POTTER
Stephen Greif wasn't available so they cast Brian Croucher - BLAKES 7
Briana Corrigan left - THE BEAUTIFUL SOUTH
a bloke fucked a monkey - THE AIDS
all their specially tuned guitars and shit was nicked - SONIC YOUTH
they decided to rebrand it and reduce the alcohol content to 4.8% in order to 'offer the customer clarity' - STELLA ARTOIS
they privatised it (many possible answers) - RAIL, ETC
he didn't get a second series - ALAN PARTRIDGE
they decided to make a fourth movie almost 20 years after the previous one - INDIANA JONES AND THE KINGDOM OF THE CRYSTAL SKULL
they made Paddy McGuire a sympathetic character after two series of him being a terrifying psychopath - SHAMELESS
Terry Bickers left the band (he's since rejoined, hurrah!) - HOUSE OF LOVE
Fred Freiberger took over as director (two answers) - STAR TREK / SPACE 1999
(, Wed 6 Mar 2013, 15:56, closed)

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