roasting this too (though slightly rewritten)
Some years ago, Mrs Sandettie worked for Asda. It was ok, she worked away from the rst of the rabble on the clothing bit and the pay wasn't bad because she worked Sundays and Mondays. Which meant double time on the Sunday and double time on bank holidays plus a day in lieu.

Then Wal-Mart took over and it all went very shit. The entire ethos changed. Making sure the store was customer friendly was approached with an almost fanatical mindset. They introduced a scheme where you could return a product, no questions asked. A bit like Argos with their 30-day policy. Except this was 100 days and you didn't need a receipt. So, those savvy customers who were happy to take the piss were effectively using the place like a clothes hire shop. Buy a shirt, wear it for 3 months, take it back and get something else.

CCTV cameras were removed as they are not customer friendly, same goes for having a security presence on the shop floor. Eventually, someone saw sense and repealed those ideas. I imagine it was a change of management who probably saw the shrinkage figures.

However, they still introduced policies with a knee-jerk reaction methodology. For example, a customer complained that whilst she was getting served, the girl serving her spoke to the girl on the next till. So a policy was introduced that people serving on till must not chat with each other and must stand waiting, 'looking eager' and once serving someone, are to engage in small talk with the customer.

By which time, Mrs Sandettie was getting very disillusioned and decided enough was enough and jacked it in.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Mon 14 Jun 2010, 16:01, 16 replies)

It does work, though
I feel terrible, but it does make the whole thing more bearable just by the way the till staff do say "Hello" vaguely enthusiastically, and make a bit of small talk/have a bit of a laugh.

At our local, however, they're replaced all till staff with the DIY machines. These invariably fall over, so there's actually an army of former till staff there to direct, authorise, fix problems and help pack. It's bloody awful.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Mon 14 Jun 2010, 16:17, closed)

I fucking hate those things with a passion
Unless you're buying fewer items than will fit comfortably in one bag, stay well clear. They don't like you moving a bag. If you take more than a few seconds to put it in the bag. They constantly error on the weight as you scan it in. Stuff that you don't need to weigh like toothpaste.

And a shit-load of other faults that only serve to piss me off.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Mon 14 Jun 2010, 16:23, closed)

I find them ok
ones at B&Q are particularly useful. I don't want to stand in a queue with a million cunts each buying stuff to recreate the rabbit-proof fence when all I'm buying is a packet of nails and some sandpaper.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Jun 2010, 16:24, closed)

B&Qs a bit different, because you don't necessarily have to put stuff in the bagging area.
Mrs Vagabond and me have a shopping trolley (yes), and it means that we have to pack twice now - once into the shopping area, and then when finished (and when finished only) from the shopping area into the trolley.

This is because it won't accept trolleys, and despite being told that we should cut down on disposable plastic bags, it still expects us to use disposable plastic bags.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Mon 14 Jun 2010, 16:27, closed)

that is true
I never use on in the supermarket if I have a trolley

and you are right about the bag thing too. that is the biggest thing that pisses me off. I get my own back by telling it I've used 20 of my own bags each time.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 14 Jun 2010, 16:31, closed)

Yes, this.
Rolled out the technology waaaaay too early.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Mon 14 Jun 2010, 16:25, closed)

DIY Self Service
Sounds like a wank in theory and is a load of wank in practice. Loads of stores around here now have them, and surprisingly enough most people avoid those checkout points like the plague. I certainly do unless its for one single item, even then its 50/50 to wether I'd want to queue instead. Hateful idea, and whoever thought of it ought to be shot..... 3 times a day before meals, then hit with hammers on Sundays
(Sir Tainley Barking Ezekiel 23:20, Mon 14 Jun 2010, 17:39, closed)

I, for one, don't need service with a smile.
If I did I'd go tip some stripper or hire a call girl.
I want to buy things as quickly as possible with as little fuss as possible -- the person on the till could be talking to thier colleague about the best way to kill me and eat me for all I care as long as I get to buy what I want without any pissing around.
(Me, I'm not... in any way intoxicated, Mon 14 Jun 2010, 17:59, closed)

When I worked at a Petrol Station
This was my policy to customers, despite managemant wanting me to chat with each person. You come into buy petrol, you're not here to browse or anything, and most of the customers need to be off in a hurry.
(Buftoon posted this on, Mon 14 Jun 2010, 18:10, closed)

^
when staff approach me in the shop to ask if there's anything I want, it creeps me out, tbh. I'd rather look for it myself and if there's something specific I want I'll ask
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 8:58, closed)

Agreed.
Every time I use those automated bastards, they never work properly. I've had staff try and persuade me to use them despite my protests, and on the rare occasions where I do give in (just to get them to shut up), the machines have some kind of error. Maybe it's just me...
(Draco Rattus ate all the pies on, Mon 14 Jun 2010, 18:00, closed)

I normally use the self service tills at Asda because they're normally quicker, but they can be a collosal pain in the arse. There's one at Asda that come up with an error for almost every item that you place in the bagging area and you have to pick it up and put it back down again a couple of times before it's happy with the weight of it. Most of the staff who look after them are completely incompetent too, half the time if you're buying booze they'll be standing there doing nothing while you scan the rest of the shopping and by the time you've finished and really need them to authorise it they're helping someone else - only once have I ever had someone there come over to authorise my booze before I was ready to pay. These days I go to a normal check out if I'm buying booze. The self check outs down give you sweets either (the guy at the til earlier gave me a sweet).
(mmm....beer, Mon 14 Jun 2010, 21:51, closed)

I'll wager
that if it even happened; what the compensation-voucher-seeking customer will have "forgotten" to mention was that it would have been checking a PLU code, borrowing a till roll, or any one of a dozen bits of brief bits of peer-to-peer chat that keep the place actually functioning smoothly.

Our place introduced a similar policy on similar grounds, which resulted in complaints about how creepy the place was if it was quiet, with staff just stood looking silently at each other; and complaints about how slow service was when it was busy, with delays and supervisor calls soaring as we had ask them to check PLU codes or get sundries (rather than ask the person stood next to you who either knew the relevant section, or had a pile of what you needed).

It became a policy where you got crap from managers if you ignored it, and crap from the supervisors if you followed it.
(The Incredible Sulk Finally remembered his password on, Mon 14 Jun 2010, 16:36, closed)

Some relevant training might be useful too
In one of the multitude of supermarkets in Cambridge (you can guess the brand).
I wanted an item to go with a console so I picked up the box and went to customer services to see if they had it in stock.
The lady on the desk seemed quite upset to be asked a question and said "you need to go to the till and, look; it doesn't even have a barcode I can scan". Not surprisingly at the till I get a look of disdain and she says "no you need to go to customer services" I protested I had just been there so she said try the cigarette counter. Finally the women on the cigarette counter actually appeared to have a clue and found someone to go fetch the item from stores and they generously allowed me to pay at customer services.
All of this took around 25 minutes.
It's common sense isn't it? Make sure that staff have all the information and training to do their jobs properly. Really what is the point of putting someone completely clueless on customer service?
(cmouse is pondering about life in other jobs, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 9:12, closed)

And the always present 'do you need a hand to pack', no, I pretty much mastered putting small objects in a bag some forty years ago - thanks!
(Benzyl, Tue 15 Jun 2010, 17:35, closed)

^This^
And all the other scripted bollocks...
"Do you have a reward/nectar/give-us-valuable-and-intrusive-personal-data-for-next-to-fuck-all card?"
"Are you collecting the school vouchers?"
"Would you like a VAT receipt?" (on the forecourts).

I noticed most of them don't ask "would you like cashback" on smaller transactions any more. Presumably some time and motion tosser noticed that it was taking morons twice as long to take out their wallet/purse to see how much cash they've got, um and ah for just a bit too long, remember their pin, punch it in, wait for the transaction to go through, wait for the cashier to open the till and give them the cash, put it away in their wallet/purse, put their debit card back in their wallet/purse, put their wallet(s)/purse(s) back in their pocket/handbag, etc. compared to just paying for their stuff and queueing up at the cash machine on the wall outside.

And why is it that the friendliest till staff always seem to be the screamingly camp ones with the fascinating skin conditions, Marty Feldman squint, paint-stripper halitosis, waterbed obesity ripples, those strange flesh-coloured plastic arthritic hand support things, etc.? They seem to be exactly the sort of people you'd cross the road to avoid in any other context. The teenagers and the pretty but dim GCSE failures can barely muster a "hello".
( shinyshinyscalp less a man, more a way of life, Thu 17 Jun 2010, 13:34, closed)