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This is a question Crap Gadgets

We wanted a monkey butler and bought one off eBay. Imagine our surprise when we found it was just an ordinary monkey with rabies. Worse: It had no butler training at all. Tell us about your duff technology purchases.

Thanks to Moonbadger for the suggestion

(, Thu 29 Sep 2011, 12:51)
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A cautionary tale - sorry for length
It's not that I am accident prone, it's that accidents seem to occur near to where I happen to be. Take DIY, for instance.
Went out to paint the fence one day, having purchased one of those spray pumps and paint for the garden fencing. I personally recommend, particularly if you are easily swayed by television advertisements, you put all notions of technology in the garden to one side and use a brush to paint the fences!
I assembled the pump and filled it with chestnut coloured fence paint, duly primed the pump and pressurized the tank, all well there. After spraying the first panel I was not suitably impressed, but it did work. Anyway, moved to panel 2, just off the patio area and re-pumped to pressurize when, BANG! The pipe came off the pump.
There was fence paint on the roof of the house extension, the conservatory, me, patio doors, patio and a huge radius of garden extending to some 15 feet! I couldn't see, because my glasses were covered (good job I had them on), then it was a toss-up, do I go for the hose to clean up the garden or have a shower first? Well the hose won, and I even had to get the ladders out to get chestnut paint off the roof of the extension and conservatory. Finally, after a couple of hours cleaning I went and had a shower and had to virtually use a brillo pad to get the stuff off, which was well and truly dried. I was still glowing red following all the abrasion, good job I didn't get any down the front of my pants! Jean arrived home and said, have you been in the garden, you look like you've caught the sun. I don't know what stopped me thumping her one! On top of that my eldest daughter remarked as I slumped at the dining table, "Dad, there's still paint on the conservatory roof".
Anyway, that morning there was, what appeared to be, a chestnut hue to a large circle just off the patio, this included plants, grass and various wildlife, like chestnut coloured blackbirds and blue tits, frogs and newts! Oh! Also noticed brown splashes on the guttering and the bedroom windows of the upper floor too.
I was thinking of taking the pump back for a refund, but I doubt whether I could have stood the embarrassment of having to explain. The last straw would have been that the next door neighbour had videoed the event and I would appear on "You've Been Framed", which I suppose would have been OK for a cut of the £250 transmission fee.
Two days later my neighbour, Phyllis, asked if I had been painting with red paint. It transpires she had splashes of fence paint across her windows. She refused my offer of reparation, saying, "No thank you, I'll do it myself". Obviously not impressed with me.
(, Wed 5 Oct 2011, 15:40, 5 replies)
Poor fellow.
I thought at first that this was going to be about the electric fence sprayers - which in my experience are absolute shit. I bought a pump sprayer this year and was pleased with it - but I might put a sheet over it next time, just in case!
(, Wed 5 Oct 2011, 16:00, closed)

My brother's neighbour had one of those and had to pay him a tidy sum for the ruined washing on the line and cleaning of brickwork and patio.
(, Wed 5 Oct 2011, 16:46, closed)
Does your home-life often threaten to descend into domestic abuse?

(, Wed 5 Oct 2011, 17:42, closed)
I bought (and used) a can of spray paint
for the radiators.
Never again. It ended up all over the walls, the floor and my shoes - and it smells vile. It's paintbrushes from now on.
(, Wed 5 Oct 2011, 19:34, closed)
This had me giggling
especially at the idea of chestnut coloured blue tits!

(, Wed 5 Oct 2011, 20:57, closed)

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