Future faking
I’m not a religious person by any means. I don’t have a problem with people who are, as long as they respect my non-belief in the same way that I would never presume to ram my atheism down their throats. But…

As some people know, me and the sweary one are getting betrothed next year (nicely co-inciding with the Edinburgh B3ta bash). We’re not having a huge ceremony, she would prefer something small and intimate, and since I’ve been there before, I’m happy to do what she wants. As long as we’re both there, I don’t really mind. I’m happy with a small do, followed by a huge party the week after. Couple of bands playing, family and friends around us, and a lifetime of happy ever after. Sorted.

Now, I’m not a stingy chap by any stretch of the imagination, but I do keep a close eye on my finances. I like to know exactly what is coming in and going out each month. I get palpitations if I think I’m going to go overdrawn. I hate being in debt, even if it’s just owing a few quid to a mate if they’ve bought gig tickets for us. The last few months have been a bit tight as Tourette’s has been out of work, but now she’s gainfully employed things are turning around. Saving any money over the last year has been an impossibility; and we’ve only just cleared the credit card from last Christmas. Hence another reason for a small ceremony – what’s the point in getting into abject hock by spending thousands of pounds on one day?

However, to have a civil ceremony is actually more expensive than if you have a religious service. So do we fake being true believers for the sake of a few quid, or do we remain true to our (lack of) principles?

They do say that Jesus saves… about £100 in this instance.

*Rubs chin*
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 15 Jul 2008, 11:18, 19 replies)

My other half
wants to get married in a church. Neither of us are religious. I'm actually quite disparaging about religion in general whenever I get the chance. But, that's what she wants, so I'll suck it up and say the right words when the time comes. Does that make me a bad person? More importantly, can I get into any sort of trouble for this kind of thing?
(Bazongaloid, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 11:22, closed)

Lack of principles?
Sounds like you do have principles, otherwise you wouldn't be agonizing over it.

I'm not in a tight spot, money-wise, so it's easy for me to say "stick to your guns"... but that's what I'd do.

In fact, it's what we did when me and the wife got married.
( Amish Information Systems hates misplaced, commas, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 11:26, closed)

Might as well fake it to save some money.
Thousands of people already do it by going to church just for the sake of appearances.
( girlinthehole, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 11:39, closed)

I'd save the money and do it in church
That way, at least the church can benefit from any donations from the congregation, and put it towards roof repairs etc. A lot of churches are falling into disrepair because weddings are no longer held in them as often; this means that they cannot afford to carry out essential repairs, and are allowed to fall derelict, or are deconsecrated and turned into a luxury flat development. Where does money from a civil service go to, out of interest?
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 11:45, closed)

Well in this case
Those profiting would be tha facility in Gretna Green - no church involved. We can have a minister if we wish, and pay him / her a fee - no idea if it goes to the minister, or to the church.

I do find it hard to reconcile individual churches abject poverty with the highly offensive wealth of the Church of England (not to mention the Catholics) in general though.

I got married in a Catholic church the last time round, more because that was what the missus wanted. She was no more a practsing Catholic than I was, even though she was baptised as one. Why we did it I don't know.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:12, closed)

Love and marriage....
First of all DG, I'd like to offer my congratulations to you and the sweary one. Combining it with a b3ta bash is inspired ;-)

For my own wedding, ex-Mrs PJM and I boarded a plane and fucked off to the Caribbean to tie the know under a palm tree. Even though things didn't work out for us, looking back I wouldn't have done it any other way.

I offer you a challenge - find a b3tan registrar who can do a b3ta themed wedding complete with Quo cutouts, kittens and magenta cocks.

I'm sure we have a man of the cloth who frequents these pages, I recall reading one of his posts a while back... Can anyone help?
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:20, closed)

I'd say it doesn't much matter, really.
As has already been said, there are plenty of people faking faith for the sake of convenience. Why shouldn't you as well?

Fortunately for me, if I should ever decide to ruin my life again remarry, I have a good friend who's an ordained minister with a very open mind who happens to share most of my views on spirituality. She's already made the offer to me to perform the ceremony wherever and however I'd like, and it'll be perfectly legal and legit. I'll most likely not take her up on it anytime soon, but it's still a very nice thought...
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:45, closed)

Yay!
Magenta Cock and Quo confetti!
( Fireflier La la la la, not listening on, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 12:45, closed)

b3ta wedding!
That almost beats my idea of a naked wedding!


You could dress your bridesmaids (were you to have any) as Teh Blessed. Genius. Or get a Blessed impersonator to marry you to each other. "I NOW PRONOUNCE YOU...MAN AND WIIIIIIFE!!"
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 13:24, closed)

^ That's
not a bad idea at all, Bob.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 15 Jul 2008, 14:00, closed)

@Bob
Naked weddings have been done. I once saw something on the telly about people getting married in the buff on a nude beach in Hawaii or something.

But a b3ta wedding - now that's a great idea.

You could always combine the two ideas too...
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 14:02, closed)

Or a naked b3ta wedding...
With a variation of the image challenge where entrants compete to shop a substitute for the fig leaf/leaves.

Perhaps I should ease back on the coffee this afternoon?
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Tue 15 Jul 2008, 14:52, closed)

PJM
I think you should...
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 15 Jul 2008, 15:09, closed)

ah, but
my naked wedding idea isn't meant to take place in Hawaii or someplace comfortably warm. Nope, it's UK-based. English summer. Country church. Congregation retiring to pub for one last pint before the service. Except everyone's naked (women may keep their hats if desired, and men their buttonholes [although I'm buggered if I know where you'd attach the damn things]). Singing 'Jerusalem', having scones and pimms at the reception venue, and then a gentle disco. A very English wedding. But naked.


Hmmm. Perhaps I should also cut down on the coffee.
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 15:22, closed)

Praise Jebus!
He won't mind.

Unconditional love and all that jazz....
(Scrumpy does not negotiate with terrorists,, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 15:48, closed)

If anyone can be bothered
there is something that you can do to be able to marry people. I don't know the exact details but a friend of mine did it so that he could marry two of his friends, and he wasn't religious in the slightest. Might be worth looking into...

EDIT: It's this, seems a bit long winded but might be fun.
( Madam Marlboro wonders if you've found her yet, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 15:52, closed)

I JUST BOOKED IT :o)
JESUS SAVES!

but Keegan scores ;o)


Big yes to magenta cock confetti!
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Tue 15 Jul 2008, 17:33, closed)

Don't you have to be a 'regular' to get married in church?

( idonthaveafunnynickname Drink-Aware? Sure. I'm aware I want another drink., Wed 16 Jul 2008, 0:23, closed)

Ah, but
We're not getting married in a church, we're getting married in an old mill forge.

Having said that, I did get married in a church the last time. The only prerequisite was that I attended a minimum of three masses on a Sunday, and agreed to bring up our children as catholics (my ex was baptised a Catholic).

We didn't have any children, she fucked around and now we're divorced. That's Catholicism for you...
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 16 Jul 2008, 9:49, closed)