I'm fighting
off depression at the mo'. Death in the family and work bollocks. Depression is a sneaky bugger; deals out sucker punches, pisses off and then comes back. Any tips how to floor it anyone?
(roysin, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 19:16, 88 replies)

Kill all your family.
That way their deaths can't come as an unpleasant surprise.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 19:17, closed)

Basically, you need to cheer up, it probably won't happen.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 19:21, closed)

No badgey, it already HAS happened.
So he needs to cheer up because it's too late to do anything for them now.
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Tue 19 Mar 2013, 19:23, closed)

But I think we can all at least agree that this is an appropriate and supportive venue to discuss clinical depression.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 21:41, closed)

Well yeah.
Of course it is. What with it being a comedy forum and all.
Nothing's funnier than other people's tragedies.
:D
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Tue 19 Mar 2013, 21:56, closed)

haha

( browser still relating boring anecdotes into a void on, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 14:42, closed)

Man the fuck up and get drunk.
Then punch out all your cow-orkers, your boss, and anyone that looks at you funny.
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Tue 19 Mar 2013, 19:22, closed)

Bloody hell
Cup of tea it is then.
(roysin, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 19:43, closed)

Exercise, get those endorphins going.

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 20:01, closed)

Agreed, taken on board

(roysin, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 21:02, closed)

Good
advice from drimble - take heed, it does make a difference.
( social hand grenade I was a lurker before you were a lurker, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 21:25, closed)

Suicide is considerably cheaper than gym membership.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 21:44, closed)

Agreed
but rather selfish.
(roysin, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 22:04, closed)

And there's less preening cunts around as well.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 22:09, closed)

less fewer


EDIT: or do you mean the cunts are doing less preening? In which case I'm terribly sorry old bean
(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 22:20, closed)

Basically Kenners..
...gyms are full of cunts. Get a dog or a pushbike, they get you out and about and actively encourage socialising. You cant' take an exercise bike into a pub.
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Thu 21 Mar 2013, 0:13, closed)

definitely this.
I finally started getting some regular exercise, and have found that the positive feeling from it can last day, I really look forward to getting down the gym and has had the knock on effect of meaning I've cut down drinking and started eating better.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 20 Mar 2013, 8:39, closed)

I find excersize drives me to drink.
I can go a few days without a drink and not feel too bad but if I get out on my bike or go for a long walk I suddenly feel invigorated and in need lf a few drinks to get rid of the boredom.
(Me, I'm not... in any way intoxicated, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 11:45, closed)

Steer clear of the drugs (pharmaceuticals of course)
Anything that takes 6 weeks to work and then you need weaning off ain't gonna help and to add to the fun it fucks with your libido - cause not being able to get it up is gonna help you feel a whole lot better about everything!

Also, what drimble said.
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Tue 19 Mar 2013, 20:58, closed)

I don't think he WANTS to fuck your wife for you though.

( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Tue 19 Mar 2013, 21:14, closed)

I'll fuck you
for a fee.
(roysin, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 21:16, closed)

I'm not cheap you know.
I'll have you know I charge 11p a go.
( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Tue 19 Mar 2013, 21:32, closed)

I have a healthy aversion towards meds
and I also agree with drimble. I have no plans to let my health deteriorate, just want to get out of this funk! Seeing a therapist; some good things there too. Most of all I have to be patient, which is good in itself. Funnily enough, it's the small things that seem to niggle most. Getting out of the front door is an achievement some days! Time to spring clean - never felt this dread before. Thanks for the input ringo - there's nothing better than good advice!
(roysin, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 21:14, closed)

I got quite deep into anything I could drink or put in a line and get up my nose after Jess died...
...and I can confirm that it's not a good route to take :/
(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 21:27, closed)

Not like you to mention Jess after all this time.
Oh, actually, hang on...
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 21:29, closed)

Nicely

(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 21:29, closed)

It's amazing how you get away with it, given how you murdered her.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 21:35, closed)

What. The. Fuck?

( Ghoti Fingers, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 22:20, closed)

I think you need to tell mummy
that you've been told to get off the computer.
NOW!
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Tue 19 Mar 2013, 22:28, closed)

Impotent twat.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 22:30, closed)

b3ta.com/questions/ihurtmyrudebits2/post1892353
( Ghoti Fingers, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 22:33, closed)

b3ta.com/questions/lolbigots/post1872240
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 22:42, closed)

How come you deleted your post down below.
Did mummy tell you off for being rude on the computer again?
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Tue 19 Mar 2013, 22:52, closed)

I don't think your
meds are working so well.
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Tue 19 Mar 2013, 22:33, closed)

I think someone needs to do something seriously bad to get the attention of the mods here.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 9:56, closed)

Oooh, I know.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 9:56, closed)

Oh man, see you in a week then?

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 22:52, closed)

'sOK ... no Chegwin.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 22:56, closed)

For what it's worth... *
...I personally don't think that's worth a stepping. It's a shit thing to say, but it hasn't ruined my life. I am going to mention Jess again now though, and say that I don't think think she'd have thought it stepworthy either.


*not much, I suspect
(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 11:29, closed)

It IS rather bizarre though innit? Post jokes, get stepped, massively insensitive twattery concerning a traumatic life event - nowt.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 15:43, closed)

Grew out of that a while back
It's like the gearbox in the head is bolloxed up.
(roysin, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 21:38, closed)

b3ta.com/questions/fightclub/post1905062
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 21:40, closed)

I did a similar thing, but not because of a similar thing, but a different thing that meant I got out of my face a lot.
And you're right, it causes all sorts of bad.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 20 Mar 2013, 8:36, closed)

Ha ha Ringo is a drug addled impotent.
Hardly a surprise.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 21:24, closed)

Drop me a GAZ if you want buddy
I haven't got much advice, but I can offer moral support & inspirational stories about how it *is* possible to come out the other side...
(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 21:20, closed)

Ditto.

(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Tue 19 Mar 2013, 22:29, closed)

Kill yourself.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 21:24, closed)

The idea
is entertaining. Though not as much as you. Keep it up!
(roysin, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 21:40, closed)

Would be a bit of a waste, given I'm not the one with the terrible (weeps) depression wah wah wah.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 21:43, closed)

Righty ho
Edit: I find listening to other people's problems a good distraction. Do go on.
(roysin, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 21:57, closed)

what worked for me...
Get over the aversion to meds. They can be a temporary relief, and they work. Stop drinking. Get out of the house, just go for a walk. Eat well. Sleep well (meds). Furious masturbation, smoke 30 a day.

Easy.
( Ken Oath, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 22:05, closed)

Trancs and wanks?
Thanks.
(roysin, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 22:12, closed)

Pretty much. But seriously, a psychiatrist will monitor meds, blood tests and all that stuff. I avoided it for years, and NoW i'M nOrMaZl agIaN.
( Ken Oath, Tue 19 Mar 2013, 22:26, closed)

Be careful, some psychiatrists are better than others
and some are a fucking disaster.
(the other guy not the one that gave you coochie warts, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 0:22, closed)

True. Shop around. Mine is good - not too much chat, more medically orientated. Trying meds is worth it, if only to establish whether they work for you, or not.

I also cut down massively on drinking, it's an eye opener how much it affects you. Grog, recreational drugs and ciggies are all forms of self medication, might as well go one step further and give the meds a go.
( Ken Oath, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 6:14, closed)

I found a good one
who is not med trigger-happy, which for me underlines his belief in his own abilities.
(roysin, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 10:33, closed)

Have sex with a post-op "lady".
Have a tranny with a fanny for the double whammy!
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Tue 19 Mar 2013, 22:36, closed)

a lot of the above is good advice.
Careful who you spend time with, assess your relationships with people. Some people can be a really negative influence and you don't always realise.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 20 Mar 2013, 8:40, closed)

True
After I returned to work after the funeral I saw much clearer who was who. One female colleague started to come on to me, turned out she was just an emotional rubbernecker with low self-esteem. But true friends have been outstanding. Timeo Danaos et dona ferentes and all that.
(roysin, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 9:58, closed)

You do have a slight advantage already.
At least you can point to reasons for being depressed. The things you mention would get anybody down.

Time will help you deal with the first one, and all work is bollocks, so, er, maybe you're fucked on that one, but there's always weekends!

Anyway, point is, it'll get better.
(username failed moderation, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 8:41, closed)

Wise words
and very true. It will get better, and reading the responses from fellow b3tans has plucked me up immensely. The advice has been on the whole good and uplifting. There are many factors that can contribute to depression, or put you in it deeper, like bad weather or shitty workmates, piles of washing, unpaid bills, shiftlessness, self-pitying, that sort of stuff.

I can only say that this general response has lifted me quite a lot and would like to thank who replied, even the less earnest ones, who provided some comic relief.

It's a humbling thing when people you have never met, and perhaps never will, extend pure good will into cyberspace.

Many, many thanks for your time and kindness, I will prove that your gestures were worthwhile. You guys are inspirational.

Edit: time for gym!
(roysin, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 10:26, closed)

Just don't underestimate the benefits of masturbation, ok?
( Ken Oath, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 10:37, closed)

Although perhaps not in the gym, the staff might get upset

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 10:44, closed)

Don't rule out meds.
If it doesn't lift in a month or so, consider going on medication. There are a wide variety of them, some with side effects and some without. Effexor did bad things to me, Wellbutrin did nothing,and there was a third one in there that made it impossible to orgasm- though I could perform, and perform for hours until we both got sore. Did not like.

Talk to the doc about them. If it's going to have bad effects it will happen within the first few days, so then you try another. Just make sure you get a young doctor who's familiar with the newer meds.

Good luck.
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Wed 20 Mar 2013, 13:01, closed)

Let me write that down
Wellbutrin. Like "weld it in", I can remember that.
( browser still relating boring anecdotes into a void on, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 14:47, closed)

Dont take any MAOI or pharmaceutical SSRI antidepressants, they dont fix the problem, just cover it up.

If your motivation level is enough to maintain going to the gym, try
5-HTP (Hydroxytrytophan) an essential amino acid not produced by the body and woefully lacking in processed food, usually available at natural health shops. The body metabolises it to seratonin, much better than taking something that blocks body chemistry from its natural absorption of seratonin. Doesnt have any recorded incidences of increased suicidal ideation when coming off it unlike the usual heavily prescribed meds like sertraline, seroxat, fluoxetine, or the huge weight gain from taking mirtazapine.
Worked for me, not a miracle cure but it can smooth the corners off a hard day and give you the space to be able to step out of the self pity cycle and takecontrol back.
25 mG an hour after you wake up, another 25mG no more than 5 hours later as it can excacerbate the insomnia your probably still putting up with.

If you want to go the SSRI route, go for Hypericin extract, (St Johns Wort) a non pharmaceutical substance that mimics the action of SSRI but a more natural and less synthetic approach, available in health shops,
important to stay off the alcohol, dont mix taking it with the 5-HTP and stay off the sunbed, it can cause some skin irritation.
(Finster Ate a cat biscuit for a bet, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 16:05, closed)

Alternatively, don't listen to this fucking idiot, listen to someone who is qualified to deal in this sort of thing.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 17:53, closed)

So having several episodes of unipolar depression, trained to diploma level in mental health care, spending a few years as a therapy session assistant for the onsite Occupational Therapist at a day unit for people with affective mental health conditions plus the opinions and advice from my GP regarding taking natural remedies outside of the standard drug therapy framework makes my advice null and void then?
Its a good job I know your an immense twat who cant help himself otherwise I might be irritated slightly.
(Finster Ate a cat biscuit for a bet, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 21:17, closed)

To answer your question; yes, those qualifications make you in no way qualified to recommend drug therapies or lack of them.

Had you a degree in pharmacy or perhaps in medicine then perhaps your recommendations to stay away from prescription drugs might carry some weight. But you don't so I suspect your recommendations might actually cause more harm than good.
( Ghoti Fingers, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 21:38, closed)

Essentially, what he said^^^^

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Thu 21 Mar 2013, 0:04, closed)

So, no actual qualls, some vague insight.
They're the worst kind of fucking idiots. The fucking idiots who epitomise the old 'a little knowledge' saying.
Steer well clear kids, this berk is the equivalent of all the people who argue that your relatives shouldn't be looked after by educated people but by those with 'common sense'.
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Thu 21 Mar 2013, 0:03, closed)

Crikey, I'm agreeing with AB
What is this? b3ta, sponsored by Holland & Barrett?
( Ghoti Fingers, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 18:51, closed)

Never go there, Its way overpriced and full of the bizzarre products that steroid monkeys have to take to prevent the comical appearance of bitch tits when they hit 40 and stop going to the gym due to back pain and early onset osteoathritis.
(Finster Ate a cat biscuit for a bet, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 21:32, closed)

nothing funny about
bitch tits
( browser still relating boring anecdotes into a void on, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 22:35, closed)

Especially if they itch and are small and have an irritating auto-nervous condition
Itchy bitchy twitchy titchy tits
( Ghoti Fingers, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 22:59, closed)

Reminds me of an ex-girlfriend who had eczema
Cracking tits.
( Ghoti Fingers, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 23:00, closed)

 
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 21 Mar 2013, 12:02, closed)

Fuck off to Tibet, you new age hippy dickwad.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 19:36, closed)

and your medical qualifications are?

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 20:16, closed)

Based on your lack of proffered helpful advice for the OP and your ignorance of my past and present, I would say somewhat more than yours.
(Finster Ate a cat biscuit for a bet, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 21:21, closed)

Mine trump both of you fucking idiots.
and I'm saying here, with my big cock of real qualifications, that you're a fucking idiot.
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Thu 21 Mar 2013, 0:05, closed)

All perspectives taken on here
I'll ask around, thanks Finster. Any doors that can lead to a better place are worth considering, at least.

Just like to say today went well, I'm back on track. I know what's to be done and have a clearer idea of how to do it. I think my priorities got messed up. A step at a time. There will be problems ahead but If the foundations are solid there is less chance of falling back.

Many, many thanks fellow b3tans, I have my oars back. I've never really laid out my doubts and fears before, but it is a good thing to do; I'm simply amazed at the positive response, and it's about bloody time I did something about getting a symbol doodah beside my name.
(roysin, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 20:24, closed)

tl;dr

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 20:32, closed)

I'd say you're halfway there already
by managing to find positives in the above :)
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 20 Mar 2013, 20:36, closed)

That's got to be the politest 'you're a fucking idiot' I ever read.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Thu 21 Mar 2013, 0:09, closed)

MEDS
If all your avenues besides medication dont help,ask your gp about citalopram ,works wonders for me.
I was on the verge of losing everything,took a fortnight off work and started taking them 10mg a day,they take the edge off the brooding and doubt and general " fuck it this life sucks " feeling.
Good luck and I hope you come out the other side like I did.
P.S like all these types of meds they have side-affects,mine was the inability to come sometimes with the misses,which is fun for her,never any problem getting it up though.
(andycrass loves two hats on, Thu 21 Mar 2013, 1:42, closed)

Thanks andycrass
I think the key here is staying positive, and in order to maintain that I'm discovering the importance of focusing on the small details - if your boat has a leak or two, left unattended the dampness can turn into something bigger. I've got some time off work so I can dock and repair.

As in everything, complacency is to be avoided; activity is a life-saver.

Hope your missus agrees :)
(roysin, Thu 21 Mar 2013, 9:18, closed)