Bacon, Bacon and more Bacon.
Bacon is the most brilliant, fantastic, amazing thing ever invented.

It's damn tasty. It goes with just about everything. Got a Chicken you intend to roast? Put some bacon on it. Want a bacon dessert? Put it in Ice cream.

It works at any time of the day. Breakfast? Bacon + toast. Lunch? Bacon works here, too. Dinner? Fuck it - more bacon! Hungover? Bacon makes it all better.

It takes seconds to cook, be it frying or grilling. It's versatile in that you can have it crispy or not - it doesn't matter, it's bacon!

It can be stored in vacuum-sealed packets that preserve it for months at a time without ruining flavour or texture.

Wife/girlfriend pissed off with you? Make her a bacon sandwich and she'll forgive you and suck your cock mere seconds after eating it.

Bacon really does make the world go 'round.

Of course, not everyone enjoys bacon. There are some people who don't really eat it. Think, for a moment, the kinds of places where bacon isn't likely to be popular - the middle east, for example. Do you think this is a coincidence? I sure as hell don't.

My solution to fix the world, or at least the middle-east, is to make everyone eat bacon. Sure, some people will get pissed off that it's against their religion but fuck it, once that sweet, greasy goodness touches their tongues, they'll realise that bacon is better than 70 virgins and that the whole suicide bombing thing was probably all a big con. If Palestine starts farming pigs, Israel will stop fucking them up, become their friends and buy a shit-load of bacon from them.

Everyone will be happy - all thanks to bacon.
(Kushan just wants to fit in..to your mum, Fri 23 Sep 2011, 16:54, 4 replies)

Hello
welcome to the Internet.

We did Bacon in 2007. It was fun.
(username failed moderation, Fri 23 Sep 2011, 16:55, closed)

Just tell them
all the virgins they've been promised look like Susan Boyle. I do believe the Indians would have conquered the world on a cultural level had they developed a bacon curry.
(ThatNiceMan thought he was being funny, Fri 23 Sep 2011, 17:01, closed)

Like Tim Minchin's Peace Song for Palestine,
but in reverse.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 23 Sep 2011, 19:01, closed)

You don't eat pigs and we don't eat pigs
Why not not eat pigs together
(wehttamman via B3ta for microwave, Sat 24 Sep 2011, 4:15, closed)