Last night…

I found somebody ploughing into the side of my car as I drove round a roundabout.

It was 100% their fault. They were in the wrong lane and just drove into me. But unfortunately, there wasn’t a lot I could do about it as I was a bit over the limit, so I just drove home.

Fuck knows how much the repairs are going to cost me.

Bloody poetic justice eh?

EDIT: after re-reading the post , I feel I should clarify that the other driver was in a car, not a plough. However, it felt at the time as if they were driving a goddam combine harvester.
( Pooflake braces for an onslaught..., Thu 13 Nov 2008, 13:17, 38 replies)

So....
You knew you were over the limit?

and you still drove?
( IHaveABadFeelingAboutThis most likely working from home on, Thu 13 Nov 2008, 13:32, closed)

*folds arms, taps foot, shakes head and tuts*
I've nearly been killed by someone who was 'a bit over the limit'.

Not impressed, old boy, not impressed.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 13 Nov 2008, 13:40, closed)

You silly sod
What you should have done was taken their insurance details and reported it when you got home, even in the unlikely event that the police HAD got involved, they wouldn't have checked you out til much later.

Oh, and don't drink and drive, unless you go really fast so they can't catch you.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 13 Nov 2008, 14:05, closed)

And if they did
and you were at home / had bussed to the police station you could say you'd had a few "to calm your nerves" at home.

Don't drink and drive. OR if you do, keep it under the limit.
( uberdeity Wondered why Owen Lars knew of the term "hell" on, Thu 13 Nov 2008, 15:32, closed)

Would the other party
not think that it was a bit odd when you just left?
What if they were twatted too...?
(tweebianmonkey Should be known as Widget, Thu 13 Nov 2008, 14:05, closed)

Very bad..
There is never an excuse for drink driving.

Are you not slightly worried that the person got your license plate, and you could get done for leaving the scene of an accident?
(The Kwyjibo A big, dumb, balding North American ape., Thu 13 Nov 2008, 14:07, closed)

Naughty Boy
Defo not the best idea in the world, hope it was the first (and last) time?

EDIT
*Reads KAOL's post*

*Gets off the high horse he rode in on*
(Fuckarma was masturbating into your handbag, Thu 13 Nov 2008, 14:10, closed)

Me?
The voice of reason?
Fuck... Something's wrong with this place.
( Cawl, Thu 13 Nov 2008, 16:10, closed)

*Does a sad kyttum face*
But...but...Mr. Pooflake...tell me you woz drinkin fizzy popz..?

*Weeps*
(GONEism, Thu 13 Nov 2008, 14:16, closed)

My old boss nearly killed himself drink-driving.
But ploughing?

Bwahahahahahaha!

/voice of reason
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 13 Nov 2008, 14:19, closed)

Its all well and good chastising Mr Pooflake for being over the limit
but what about all those people that have accidents when not under the influence of alcohol! They haven't even got an excuse for their driving to be impaired.
( Peej, Thu 13 Nov 2008, 14:20, closed)

@
Was it Lee Mack who joked about that?
'Drink-driving only takes up a very small percentage of the total number of accidents every year, so you're less likely to crash if you're drunk than if you're sober.'
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 13 Nov 2008, 14:24, closed)

So should I take up drinking while driving?
I'm worried that the champagne bubbles will get up my nose while I'm negotiating T-junctions.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Thu 13 Nov 2008, 14:29, closed)

I think he even said
that there are even fewer cases of juggling-while-driving accidents. So if possible, try to drink, juggle and drive, just to reduce the risk.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 13 Nov 2008, 14:33, closed)

Okay
*buys pink champagne and juggling balls*

*goes to car*
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Thu 13 Nov 2008, 16:22, closed)

*shrugs*
We all make mistakes.
I'm a bit surprised by this response, to be honest.

Anyway, the "ploughing" reference instantly made me think "your bean-field"...
( Cawl, Thu 13 Nov 2008, 14:30, closed)

not 'just a mistake'
I'd suggest that the tone of this implies pooflake thinks it's not a big deal, therefore has probably done it quite a few times rather than it being just a boyish mistake like forgetting to record a tv program for the wife.
Drink driving is unnecessary, not cool, and definitely not something to be taken lightly. It's irresponsible and dangerous and really fucking immature to be honest. If you want to get drunk, don't drive. If you dont' want to get drunk, for god's sake be sensible enough to stay under the limit- why on earth do you ened the extra half that'll push you 'safely' over the limit? You don't. If you want to get proper smashed, go for it and take a cab/sleep in the mud/call your mum at 5am. If you want the convenience of driving, take some responsibility and act like a grown-up and stick within the limit. Our limit is higher than every other country in Europe apart from Lichtenstein (they're the same as us) so it cna't reasonably be argued that it's sissily low. Scientists made it, and scientists rock.
Listen to science and stop being a silly little boy. Silyl little boys can kill people too, even if they can write funny stories.
(octopuspie, Thu 13 Nov 2008, 15:27, closed)

^This,
or words to this effect.
( IHaveABadFeelingAboutThis most likely working from home on, Thu 13 Nov 2008, 15:28, closed)

^
Exactly!
( SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Thu 13 Nov 2008, 15:30, closed)

*sighs*
I just read the "top story" in your profile.
I really don't think that you're in any position to preach.
( Cawl, Thu 13 Nov 2008, 15:50, closed)

*handbags*

( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 13 Nov 2008, 16:14, closed)

*kisses Burt*

( Cawl, Thu 13 Nov 2008, 16:15, closed)

Kaol
and at what point did I potentially put someone in danger in that post???

Oh yeah, that bit - fair point I suppose but it was ONE beer and perhaps 2 spliffs but thats not a justification. Besides, I was passenger not driver (if that makes a difference)
( SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Thu 13 Nov 2008, 16:28, closed)

I've gazzed you
:)
( Cawl, Thu 13 Nov 2008, 16:52, closed)

and confused me
all in one go!

Edit: oh yeah, get it now. Thats fuckingharsh (so harsh it doesn't get a space)
( SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Thu 13 Nov 2008, 16:57, closed)

*Comes back from lunch*

(and not a liquid lunch, before anybody starts)

Eek, I had a feeling this would happen…

Yep – I had 2 pints of cider, and I drove. Not the cleverest thing I’ve ever done, and I don’t want to start a debate on tolerance…

But 'those who are without sin cast the first stone' and all that. If somebody has never done anything with a potential element of risk than they can feel free to call me what they like.

To quote the song, ‘I’m only Human, of flesh & Blood I’m made’. I live in the real world and I’m not going to pretend I’ve never done anything wrong.

If I had been stopped by the police, They would have arrested me, and quite rightly. I broke the law. But I wasn't, and apart from somebody twatting into my car it would have been a pretty uneventful drive.

Besides…what about the person who hit me? Were they drunk? If so, they’re lucky that I drove away. And what if they weren’t drunk?, then they drove into me sober? What does that prove? I don’t know.

I am NOT saying what I did I was right – I am NOT saying that it was acceptable – like many things I’ve done in the past…The thing is that I have admitted it, I wasn’t bragging about it and I’ll take whatever flaming is thrown at me. I don’t mind – but perhaps some people should take off their bandwagon-jumping, ‘holier than thou’ hats – particularly when their own profiles are full of wrongdoings.

So say what you want, but if you do, I expect you all to dish out equal amounts of grief to any future posts with drug / theft / infidelity / any-sort-of-illegal reference…

Because anything else would be double standards…

On your marks…
( Pooflake braces for an onslaught..., Thu 13 Nov 2008, 15:37, closed)

2 hour lunch?
Now that's fucking criminal!

I'm just jealous
(Fuckarma was masturbating into your handbag, Thu 13 Nov 2008, 15:45, closed)

to pooflake:
I prescribe AA.
To everyone else, Take an anger management class!
(Roopy all is not what it seams, Thu 13 Nov 2008, 15:47, closed)

No need, thanks...

I'm with the RAC...

too early for jokes?
( Pooflake braces for an onslaught..., Thu 13 Nov 2008, 15:51, closed)

hahahahaha
you got me there!
(Roopy all is not what it seams, Thu 13 Nov 2008, 16:00, closed)

Pretty much what I expected.
I know that you've got enough sense to not drive when pissed.

Like you said, t'was a silly thing to do, but oh well.
If we were all sensible and law-abiding all of the time, b3ta would be a fucking boring place.
( Cawl, Thu 13 Nov 2008, 15:48, closed)

So true
Theres never any excuse to drink and drive, but at least he was honest about it, and shows regrets.

A funny story:

My dad was once driving home drunk, he didn't want to especially but an emergancy meant he had to be somewhere and decided the risk was worth it if he drove very slowly. It was about 3 am in the Birmingham area.
While driving round a roundabout on completely empty roads, he missed his turning off, and in his drunkenness, he decided maybe it'd be OK to reverse back and take the turning rather than continue round the big roundabout.

Unfortunately however, no sooner had he started reversing, a car came out of nowhere and bumped into the back of the car. Not a big crash, just a fender bender. He was going to do a pooflake and just drive off, when a police car followed the crashee round the corner.

My dad sat there sweating and knowing the worst was about to happen while the policeman talked to the driver in the car behind. Then he approached my dads car.

Shaking, he opened the window, and waited for the breathalyser. The policeman arrived, grinned, and said "No worries mate, your cars hardly scratched. But the guy who hit you is so fucked he can hardly stand, over twice the limit. He said he thought you were driving BACKWARDS round the roundabout! It's amazing he found the ignition in the first place! You'd better get on home. Have a nice night".

That was a bit of a wake up call, a lesson to be learned indeed!
(Roopy all is not what it seams, Thu 13 Nov 2008, 15:58, closed)

Oooh...

Until now, to 'do a Pooflake' meant 'to disastrously papper your pants or an unsuspecting area in some comedic fashion'...and to be honest I'd rather still rather it be known for that than drink driving thanks.
( Pooflake braces for an onslaught..., Thu 13 Nov 2008, 16:07, closed)

I still love "pulling an Enzyme"
That is, to stay in a brothel, thinking it's a cheap and cheerful hotel.
( Cawl, Thu 13 Nov 2008, 16:12, closed)

Apologies to pooflake
Somethings illegal can be fun but not when you put, or there is the potential to put, other people at risk.

Sorry if I went off one a bit mate, I doubt you are a cunt - you're probably a really decent bloke but drink-driving is one of the few things that hits a nerve with me.
( SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Thu 13 Nov 2008, 15:53, closed)

No apologies necessary...

My life is strewn with mistakes (ones that I have been responsible for and ones that I have been victim of) that could have been prevented if people like yourself and some people replying above had been around to prevent them happening in the first place.

I was going to say 'There is always a place for morals and ethics', but then I remembered what site I was on.

But you're wrong about one thing...I am a cunt.
( Pooflake braces for an onslaught..., Thu 13 Nov 2008, 16:03, closed)

manhug for pooflake
I deleted my 'off-topic' post and some of my replies here. Like you so rightly pointed out, this isn't the sort of place where morals and ethics have much meaning.

I take a big hooter of charlie at the weekend just for you xoxox
( SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Thu 13 Nov 2008, 16:05, closed)

B3ta...
Ain't no paddock for high horses.
(GONEism, Thu 13 Nov 2008, 16:22, closed)