
Sandettie Light Vessel Automatic tells us: "Until I pointed it out, my other half use to hang out the washing making sure that both pegs were the same colour. Now she goes out of her way to make sure they never match." Tell us about bizarre rituals, habits and OCD-like behaviour.
( , Thu 1 Jul 2010, 12:33)
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My girlfriend and I once went out for a cup of coffe. She knows I'm obsessed with my new iPad I got a few months ago. She says to me, "I know you like that but I'm here so you have someone to talk to." I looked up and said, "It's either I play with my iPad or I masturbate on you at home. You pick." There was a soft silence and she said, "Play with your iPad." WIN!!
( , Mon 5 Jul 2010, 6:43, 23 replies)

And some people wonder why I take the piss out of you lot.
( , Mon 5 Jul 2010, 11:57, closed)

when his girlfriend is off fucking someone - anyone - else who isn't a hideously maladjusted social cripple. As he'll have even more time with his shiny emperor's new iPod touch.
But, for the record, I think this is a spoof account. No-one could actually BE this much of cockjockey.
( , Mon 5 Jul 2010, 12:01, closed)

Was this just a lying post to tell the internet you have an iPad? I think it was, wasn't it?
( , Mon 5 Jul 2010, 12:10, closed)

At diner I talk to her..at home I wrestle her and masturbate on her whenever...but she says, "You keep missing!"
( , Tue 6 Jul 2010, 0:55, closed)

Still, not everyone has the way with words that I do..
( , Mon 5 Jul 2010, 12:37, closed)

"I'LL SPUNK ON YOUR TITS"
( , Mon 5 Jul 2010, 12:39, closed)

'Masturbate on you' implies some sort of sweaty, clumsy frottage.
( , Mon 5 Jul 2010, 13:20, closed)

You show that BITCH who's boss right? If some HO was all up ins going at me like 'playa u gotta put down that ipad yo and be givin' me some ATTENSHUN' I'd be all 'YO WOMAN U DU KNOTT SPPEEK 2 ME LIEK DAT I AM THE LASH AND LAW WOMAN' and then I'd be all five fingered slap in her FAYSE yo no bitch be givin' dat 2 me amirite? YAH
( , Mon 5 Jul 2010, 12:24, closed)

Abusive relationships are fucking HILARIOUS. Lying wanker.
( , Mon 5 Jul 2010, 12:29, closed)

I told her "If you want sperm, get it from a sperm bank.
( , Tue 6 Jul 2010, 0:52, closed)

Then wank away to your hearts content. You can even take a shit on her if you want.
( , Mon 5 Jul 2010, 17:54, closed)

The Apple guys dont allow me near their stores again.
( , Tue 6 Jul 2010, 0:51, closed)
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