Travelling on an escalator
A few years ago I was travelling on a long long up escalator at some random tube station. I was chatting to some friends when the lady about 10 steps ahead of me started to wobble. Seeing her tumble backwards head over heels I braced myself to catch her. She hit me harder than I thought but I managed to hold on with her on top of me legs akimbo. She was going commando and her lady garden was bald. I got a good view until we reached the top.

She hurried into an upright position, pulled her skirt down and swore at me for looking at her minge before rapidly making her getaway. Considering she was lying with her minge about 3 inches from my face and I was holding on for dear life there was much I could do apart from look, sniff and wish for a 4 inch tongue.
(vikingaero Deilvered To Your Door in 30 mins, Sat 11 May 2013, 18:42, 16 replies)

I love the sound of virgins in the evening.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sat 11 May 2013, 18:52, closed)

You should have spat at her fanny. It's sexy.

( 4Q just lurking, Sat 11 May 2013, 19:13, closed)

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Sat 11 May 2013, 19:15, closed)

Well I definitely believe this happened.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sat 11 May 2013, 19:32, closed)

I dunno, the OP seems like a particularly tragic sex offender type so...

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Sat 11 May 2013, 19:34, closed)

you sniffed a strangers fanny and this is not creepy?

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Sat 11 May 2013, 20:27, closed)

Ahem.

Your correction was incorrect.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Sat 11 May 2013, 21:41, closed)

I saw a minge once.

( Ring Of Fire A petty, drooling belming butthurt retard., Sat 11 May 2013, 20:28, closed)

Shit. No way.
What's it like?
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sat 11 May 2013, 20:38, closed)

Like a small angry pug
fighting a bumblebee.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Sun 12 May 2013, 8:22, closed)

Not really, It was my uncle's minge.

( Ring Of Fire A petty, drooling belming butthurt retard., Sun 12 May 2013, 11:00, closed)

alright Vinegar Strokes

( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sat 11 May 2013, 20:53, closed)

You have no idea how amusing I find the fact that you thought it was a good idea to post this.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Sat 11 May 2013, 22:34, closed)

I've clicked this in the hope it remains forever on his profile.

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 14 May 2013, 14:13, closed)

How the fuck
did her legs get their hands on her hips?
(An Alien sneezed on Bill Oddies binoculars, Wed 15 May 2013, 22:13, closed)

I've spent far too much time on working out what position this woman ended up in.
I think I've got it now. Benny Hill would be proud.

My resolution: ALWAYS wear knickers on escalators.
(Juan Quar is clinging to her front teeth on, Thu 16 May 2013, 9:31, closed)