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This is a question Oblique Strategies for Work

We want you to share solutions that solved work problems - but don't explain the problem it solved.

The idea is that someone else, when they have a problem can read this and see if your solution jolts them out of their problem.

(This is obviously a tribute to Brian Eno's Oblique Strategies cards which were filled with stuff like "add backing vocals")

(I helped save b3ta! rob, Tue 15 May 2018, 10:45)
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This question is now closed.

Press F5. Press F9. Select 'Refresh'. Update links. Enable macros. Close and reopen.
Spin on your chair clockwise once, then back anti-clockwise once.

One of these things will work, but sometimes you need to do them all - and maybe in different orders.
(Chunder, Wed 16 May 2018, 18:07, Reply)
Make sure nobody saw you. Put it back where you found it, and leave it for someone else to deal with.
Who, me? No sorry, I had no idea that was there/like that...
(Chunder, Wed 16 May 2018, 18:03, Reply)
Sigh heavily, then make a cup of tea for everyone.
Repeat as required until solved.
(Chunder, Wed 16 May 2018, 17:57, Reply)
A 1-person excuse generator
Set an alarm with the same sound as your ringtone to give you options.
(Ogginblog, Wed 16 May 2018, 17:31, Reply)
A two step strategy, applicable to most situations:
Step 1) Cover it in jam
Step 2) Spunk in its eye
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 16 May 2018, 16:49, Reply)
If you stand still long enough
The world comes back round to you
(LetsGetDownToIt, Wed 16 May 2018, 16:32, Reply)
Make it up as you go along...
everybody else does.
(I helped save b3ta! Araucaria is such a tit, Wed 16 May 2018, 16:18, Reply)
If shape-shifting into a panther isn't getting the job done,
try shape-shifting into a hawk.
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 16 May 2018, 14:56, Reply)
Avoid running on the job
try to arrive at the problem calm and collected
(I helped save b3ta! horace wimp needs more than 49 characters to fully express hi, Wed 16 May 2018, 14:32, 1 reply)
A well timed press of the "Turbo Boost" button
has gotten me out of more scrapes than I care to count!
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 16 May 2018, 14:14, Reply)
Set an alarm on your phone
when attending a boring meeting. When it goes off..."sorry I've got to take this" leave meeting comeback after a bit of loafing about giving you a much needed break
(sittingduck Attention seeking, bullshitting fuck-knuckle, Wed 16 May 2018, 13:05, Reply)
Plot it on an X/Y graph
and arbitrarily mark some of it as red (for bad)
(lordfredatron lordfredatron, Wed 16 May 2018, 12:34, Reply)
Accept bad debt as soon as possible and let it go
For much better sleep
(I helped save b3ta! willmod, Wed 16 May 2018, 11:50, Reply)
Make a royal song and dance (at the time that it occurs) when giving anything for free or accepting project creep
At invoice time, you have a few things to throw back if there are quibbles about other things
(I helped save b3ta! willmod, Wed 16 May 2018, 11:47, Reply)
Use the open source dev tools, even if you don't know how they work
*Especially* if you don't know how they work.
(I helped save b3ta! notmoro and mrnotmoro : formerly Ishamael and his Missus, Wed 16 May 2018, 11:24, Reply)
Go for a jog and think about the problem whilst your stress levels are down.
Or, get pissed and think about the problem whilst your stress levels are down.
(I helped save b3ta! monkeon schmonkeon, Wed 16 May 2018, 11:19, Reply)
Change the recipient of your email to the companywide mailing list and send without review

(Bhison is tripping over the shoelaces of life, Wed 16 May 2018, 11:10, Reply)
Switch the multiply to a divide, even if it doesn't make sense
Might take a bit of effort to apply this to a non-programming setting but I imagine you could do so with a bit of imagination
(Bhison is tripping over the shoelaces of life, Wed 16 May 2018, 11:08, Reply)
Hide in a cardboard box until they stop looking for you.

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 16 May 2018, 9:59, 3 replies)
True
Invent a fake resource in the Offshore Development Factory ("Anil Punisha") as a stool pigeon
(I helped save b3ta! Piper Alpha is being a grumpy northerm bastard on:, Wed 16 May 2018, 9:45, Reply)
Money up front
Always money up front.
(I helped save b3ta! moonbadger Doesn't judge a fish by its ability to climb trees, Wed 16 May 2018, 6:06, Reply)
Buzzword bingo is mandatory
Loser makes the coffee
(I helped save b3ta! moonbadger Doesn't judge a fish by its ability to climb trees, Wed 16 May 2018, 6:05, Reply)
Fire the graduates.
Employ only the time served.
(I helped save b3ta! moonbadger Doesn't judge a fish by its ability to climb trees, Wed 16 May 2018, 6:04, Reply)
“I’ve never been in a hole I couldn’t get out of ...”
“... using all caps and an exclamation mark at the end of each line.”
(dandelionburdock, Wed 16 May 2018, 1:35, Reply)
“Let’s make a poster and help raise awareness”
This, how I managed to get Photoshop installed on my work machine BITD, which I didn’t need and only wanted for b3ta image challenges.
I knocked up said poster quickly in Quark while waiting for IT to get their shit together. Then scored half a day of fannying around time to make something that already existed.
That was the day I got my first ever b3ta FP.
(dandelionburdock, Wed 16 May 2018, 1:26, Reply)
Decided it might be better to remove the swastikas from the branding

(I helped save b3ta! The_cold_stare Coming here only when very, very bored, Wed 16 May 2018, 0:29, Reply)
Create new admin account in boss's name
Email link to oneself, wait 18 months, log in and lock everyone's accounts, conveniently pop in for coffee.
(POG_Thief, Tue 15 May 2018, 23:35, Reply)
Always bear in mind that not everyone’s an idiot, but there are an awful lot of them out there

(I helped save b3ta! cumquat may will not be commenting further on the allegations, Tue 15 May 2018, 23:25, 1 reply)
Put fake meetings in your shared outlook calendar

(I helped save b3ta! cumquat may will not be commenting further on the allegations, Tue 15 May 2018, 23:14, 2 replies)

This question is now closed.

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