what's a really big horse

(Icky the bare bum firebobby oggglebogglehnnngagagawurrrr, Wed 14 Aug 2013, 14:31, 95 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

I'll just leave this here for when we've finished mocking Monty's real estate aspirations
www.theguardian.com/politics/shortcuts/quiz/2013/aug/13/quiz-ukip-fruitcake-test

I am apparently far too lefty for UKIP.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 14 Aug 2013, 14:15, 130 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Big Tings A'gwan.
I have estate agents coming round to value the old Chateau Boyce tomorrow, it's ON, muthafuckas. Mixture of great disappointment and the beginnings of rather looking forward to moving on.

What are you disappointed in?

Alt: what are you looking forward to?

Altalt: Why you no rissen?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 14 Aug 2013, 12:37, 221 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

this needs a new thread
i don't get yoga. it doesn't feel as if you are working out (even sweaty bikram). but look at the bodies of people who practice it, and you MUST be. what science don't you understand/think must be magic?

alt: just got an email from a lady who spells "susan" as "soosanne". what was the last piece of pretension/stupidity that you saw?

altalt: who's your hero?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 14 Aug 2013, 10:30, 210 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

pearoast:
Morning. For that is its name.

Today work is going to be a pain in the arse. One chap is on holiday and someone else has been off sick with that Jimmy Hill disease, you know like Battered has got?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 14 Aug 2013, 7:29, 325 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Oh *sigh*, where did it all go wrong?

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 13 Aug 2013, 20:18, 179 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

hahahahaha yeah hahahahaha
what's on telly or something probably
(Icky the bare bum firebobby oggglebogglehnnngagagawurrrr, Tue 13 Aug 2013, 19:04, Reply)

alright

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 13 Aug 2013, 17:39, 72 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Coincidence or dental suicide
I had arranged to take this morning off work in order for me to visit the dentist for my yearly check up. So after a bit of a lie-in, I wake up and start making myself presentable. One of my back molars totally shattters in half when I start flossing- leaving the tooth broken at the gum line except for 1 massive shard of enamel with an edge like a razor.

It was quite painful, the nerve was exposed and quite a lot of blood was flooding the bathroom but I think myself quite lucky- I already had a dental appointment booked and it was a mere 30 minutes away.

As I sit at my desk now, with a temp filling and still doped up I ponder whether the tooth, knowing its time was up, simply jumped out of my mouth.
(big-nose-and-bald, Tue 13 Aug 2013, 14:24, 168 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

"Ohno!" moments
As I've managed to nick swipe's thread for somereason, have another one

Tell me of the moments, my beautiful friends
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 13 Aug 2013, 14:22, 82 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

'And next up on OT TV we have 'Swipe In The Shitty".
Tell me about some more b3ta posters in their own telly shows.
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Tue 13 Aug 2013, 14:10, 16 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

"Shit me roit ap"
What genuinely has scared/grossed the fuck out of you?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 13 Aug 2013, 14:07, 31 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

hahahahaha yeah hahahahaha
yeah hahahahaha

haha

yeah
(Icky the bare bum firebobby oggglebogglehnnngagagawurrrr, Tue 13 Aug 2013, 13:41, 22 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Are you easily shockable? What was the last thing that shocked/should have shocked you?
Alt: lazy people take the greatest pains. What's your lazy guilty secret?

Altalt: lunch? I have an innocent noodle veg pot and a pint of milk
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 13 Aug 2013, 12:59, 111 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Are you happy at work?
www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-23640900
Do you stick out something you loathe, for the cash, or would you take a salary drop, for something you liked?
Alt, did anyone watch the meteor thing last night? Any good? Completely forgot about it.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Tue 13 Aug 2013, 9:53, 90 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Yeah whad up money grip?
Tuesday is here YES!!!!!!!

Just reading about the possible closing of all tube ticket offices and having a wry chuckle. Their fucking cunt union has behaved so appallingly for so long that bosses are prepared to do almost anything just to lay people off. Your fault, cunts. Or am *I* the cunt here?

Alt: I woke up with LL Cool J's 'Mama Said Knock You Out' in my head. I think it's the best comeback record of all time. Possibly the best comeback of all time although Elvis Presley's 1968 effort was a good shout. Who or what do you think is history's finest comeback?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 13 Aug 2013, 7:56, 269 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Battered wants a new thread.
Here it is.

If you were forced to go in to one of the military services, what one and why?

Alt: Meh, do what you want.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 12 Aug 2013, 22:53, 42 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

182/7.
Not going to see my daughter for a week now, she's going to Edinburgh with her mother.

So, apart from a few hours work over the next few days I have a lot of time on my hands. How should I spend the time? Apart from wanking & drinking obvs.

I am buying a banjo tomorrow, so that's a start.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 12 Aug 2013, 18:48, 323 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

hahaha no
Right you lot. It's 4pm and I have 45 mins left at work.

Tell me of your woes
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 12 Aug 2013, 15:59, 145 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

hahahahaha yeah hahahahaha
Hank accidentally kills Walter White Jr, just sayin
(Icky the bare bum firebobby oggglebogglehnnngagagawurrrr, Mon 12 Aug 2013, 14:30, 72 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Good afternoon you lot, did you miss me last week? I bet you did.
I spent a lot of time trying to get rid of fermenting cherries, and fending off drunken birds from the house, what’s been the weirdest week off from work for you?

Alt: I was attacked by a drunken magpie last week, have you been attacked by an animal, if so tell us so we can point and laugh.

Alt:alt: I discovered proper American style BBQ brisket last week, what have you discovered lately?
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 12 Aug 2013, 13:48, 167 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Menkle Thread
When was the last time you were a teeny bit unhinged, either temporarily or for a longer period? I won't even bother answering this one myself.

Alt: how did you come to terms with your actions afterwards? In denial or happy to admit youe moment (or more) of weakenss?

AltALt: Always been totally sane? Seriously? Well done have a medal and tell us all how you manage it.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Mon 12 Aug 2013, 13:01, 117 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

so a judge has ordered that a baby cannot be called "messiah" and has ruled that he must be called "martin"
should judges have this power? or is in the child's interest not to have that name? and whereabouts in the world do you think this happened?

alt: do you have any principles? what are they and do you ever breach them?

altalt: lunch, of course?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 12 Aug 2013, 11:52, 154 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

When did you witness/ be on the receiving end of complete nastiness?
Any replies mentioning my mother will be ignored.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 12 Aug 2013, 10:34, 196 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

hahahahaha yeah hahahahaha
monday hahahahahahayeah

yeah

hahahahahaha
(Icky the bare bum firebobby oggglebogglehnnngagagawurrrr, Mon 12 Aug 2013, 10:04, 44 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

urgh I'm fucking hanging
u jel?

Alt: good weekend?

Altalt: anything exciting happening this week? MY MUM'S EXCITING HAHHAHAfuck off
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 12 Aug 2013, 7:00, 211 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

hahahahaha yeah hahahahaha

(Icky the bare bum firebobby oggglebogglehnnngagagawurrrr, Sun 11 Aug 2013, 17:49, 3 replies, latest was 12 years ago)