Happy birthday sir
I'm supposed to be doing a phone interview with Radio Norfolk this morning. This is surely as good as it's ever going to get.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:15, 7 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

I thought you were very dignified on the telly last night.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:19, Reply)

Oh thank you very much!
Very kind of you to say. Thanks for watching it.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:30, Reply)

You know Alan Partridge isn't real, right?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:26, Reply)

I choose not to accept that
A world without Alan would scarcely be worth enduring
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:31, Reply)

Maybe in Norwich
Last time he was funny was the Day Today
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:11, Reply)

We're simple folk
Local celebrities for local people

Like me
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:21, Reply)

Did you get Adams number?

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:28, Reply)

No, we said we'd all stay in touch and did we bollocks
It may amaze to learn that he's gay
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:33, Reply)

NO WAI!

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:35, Reply)

I NO RITE

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:37, Reply)

Are you Norfolk's youngest butcher?

( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:28, Reply)

'The time, for those who like to tell it in a slightly wacky way,
is fifty to six. Or, if you'd like to develop the idea, seventy past four. Or even, er....bear with me, one thousand, two hundred and thirty to twelve. I'm joking of course, but the time is ten past five.'
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:35, Reply)

Ruddy hell,
it's Soft Cell.
( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:42, Reply)

The question is, where are we going to eat and which floor's the restaurant on?
The answer is The Chinese Way... and Level 42
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:46, Reply)

'In 1976 I saw ELO at the Birmingham NEC.
I was there shouting with everyone else – “come back on, ELO, and carry on playing'"
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:46, Reply)

You probably actually did though, didn't you

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:51, Reply)

I did go to a lot of gigs when I was three, it's true.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:53, Reply)

*counts on fingers*
Jesus, you're only five years older than me. I might have to stop with the zimmer frame gags
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:03, Reply)

Well, he's 15 years older than me
So I'm still fine to take the piss!
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:16, Reply)

five thirteen

/Norwich
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:17, Reply)

Harsh
but fair. As I bask in my local celebrity status, I'm very grateful that folks round these 'ere parts haven't worked out how to use cameras yet
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:22, Reply)

Still not caught you on that there tellybox
For some reason, iPlayer was determined not to work last night.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:36, Reply)

You need to switch your gaylord filter off.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:38, Reply)

I wondered where you'd gone last night.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:44, Reply)

ZING!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:12, Reply)

Should be on there for about a fortnight
Be prepared to be amazed by how girly my voice is
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:38, Reply)

I shall try to cope with this shock news.
God knows how, but I'll try.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:42, Reply)

I assumed you'd cope
by not watching the programme and never finding out. Which will save you from the baying mobs of gossip-hungry journalists when you inevitably visit Norfolk.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:47, Reply)

If I get a moment I will watch it.
In search of fresh ammunition, you understand.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:50, Reply)

Ann berated a woman for being fat.
It was all very internet.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:52, Reply)

Apart from the girly voice and looking a borderline morbid level of serious
I think I did OK. You, of course, will find it hilarious that I answered "Ted Hughes" rather than W.H. Auden. Even I'm kicking myself for that one, with hindsight
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:52, Reply)

Ursine
was a good answer I thought
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:05, Reply)

Cheers mate
That was the one I was most pleased with, just because an awful lot of people seemed amazed that I know that
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:06, Reply)

I practically yelled it at my laptop
So you're welcome for the assistance.
Edit: I didn't get the 'Faulkner' one though, so well done there.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:10, Reply)

She is lovely
*rubs thighs*
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:12, Reply)

I only know that because Ms Foxtrot loves Masterchef
That said, as we were watching it she had no idea of the answer and when I told her it was down to her she was completely bemused. Blondes, eh
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:14, Reply)

I knew it
but I couldnt think of the answer as quick as you

*doffs cap*
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:10, Reply)

I thank you
Most kind
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:16, Reply)

You have an amazing poker face.
And Charms looked over my shoulder, blinked, and asked who the guy in the Joker outfit was.

Well done.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:48, Reply)

Thank you
The ridiculously serious face was due to high levels of concentration; both trying to make sure I heard the questions correctly and supressing the urge to shit myself
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:53, Reply)

Actually, I found the poker face much better than that simpering fool further round on your left
(from your side I think)

That really fucking pissed me off. You could have smiled when you won, though.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:55, Reply)

Smiling's for cunts.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:57, Reply)

I'll say that next time you loom over me like a giant yokel scarecrow.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:03, Reply)

I am mortally offended. Yokel?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:09, Reply)

ARIIIGHHHHT MY LOVERRRRR

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:20, Reply)

By the time I won I'd answered eight questions and got five of them wrong
It was all I could do not to faint with relief
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:02, Reply)

Congrats dude, saw it last night
You looked very composed and definitely deserved to win it.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:49, Reply)

Cheers mate :-)

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:54, Reply)