Good Morning /OT. It is my Birthday today, I'm certain that I have fewer years ahead of me than I have already had.
I have achieved a few mediocre things in my life, which is not bad, as most people thought that I would achieve fuck all.

So, do you feel that you have reached the best point of your life? Are you still looking, or hoping for something better, or has your rollercoaster gone over the top and you are going down hill fast?

Oh, happy candleday to Rachelswipe.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 7:57, 109 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Happy birthday sir
I'm supposed to be doing a phone interview with Radio Norfolk this morning. This is surely as good as it's ever going to get.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:15, Reply)

I thought you were very dignified on the telly last night.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:19, Reply)

Oh thank you very much!
Very kind of you to say. Thanks for watching it.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:30, Reply)

You know Alan Partridge isn't real, right?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:26, Reply)

I choose not to accept that
A world without Alan would scarcely be worth enduring
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:31, Reply)

Maybe in Norwich
Last time he was funny was the Day Today
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:11, Reply)

We're simple folk
Local celebrities for local people

Like me
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:21, Reply)

Did you get Adams number?

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:28, Reply)

No, we said we'd all stay in touch and did we bollocks
It may amaze to learn that he's gay
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:33, Reply)

NO WAI!

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:35, Reply)

I NO RITE

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:37, Reply)

Are you Norfolk's youngest butcher?

( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:28, Reply)

'The time, for those who like to tell it in a slightly wacky way,
is fifty to six. Or, if you'd like to develop the idea, seventy past four. Or even, er....bear with me, one thousand, two hundred and thirty to twelve. I'm joking of course, but the time is ten past five.'
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:35, Reply)

Ruddy hell,
it's Soft Cell.
( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:42, Reply)

The question is, where are we going to eat and which floor's the restaurant on?
The answer is The Chinese Way... and Level 42
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:46, Reply)

'In 1976 I saw ELO at the Birmingham NEC.
I was there shouting with everyone else – “come back on, ELO, and carry on playing'"
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:46, Reply)

You probably actually did though, didn't you

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:51, Reply)

I did go to a lot of gigs when I was three, it's true.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:53, Reply)

*counts on fingers*
Jesus, you're only five years older than me. I might have to stop with the zimmer frame gags
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:03, Reply)

Well, he's 15 years older than me
So I'm still fine to take the piss!
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:16, Reply)

five thirteen

/Norwich
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:17, Reply)

Harsh
but fair. As I bask in my local celebrity status, I'm very grateful that folks round these 'ere parts haven't worked out how to use cameras yet
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:22, Reply)

Still not caught you on that there tellybox
For some reason, iPlayer was determined not to work last night.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:36, Reply)

You need to switch your gaylord filter off.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:38, Reply)

I wondered where you'd gone last night.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:44, Reply)

ZING!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:12, Reply)

Should be on there for about a fortnight
Be prepared to be amazed by how girly my voice is
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:38, Reply)

I shall try to cope with this shock news.
God knows how, but I'll try.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:42, Reply)

I assumed you'd cope
by not watching the programme and never finding out. Which will save you from the baying mobs of gossip-hungry journalists when you inevitably visit Norfolk.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:47, Reply)

If I get a moment I will watch it.
In search of fresh ammunition, you understand.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:50, Reply)

Ann berated a woman for being fat.
It was all very internet.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:52, Reply)

Apart from the girly voice and looking a borderline morbid level of serious
I think I did OK. You, of course, will find it hilarious that I answered "Ted Hughes" rather than W.H. Auden. Even I'm kicking myself for that one, with hindsight
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:52, Reply)

Ursine
was a good answer I thought
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:05, Reply)

Cheers mate
That was the one I was most pleased with, just because an awful lot of people seemed amazed that I know that
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:06, Reply)

I practically yelled it at my laptop
So you're welcome for the assistance.
Edit: I didn't get the 'Faulkner' one though, so well done there.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:10, Reply)

She is lovely
*rubs thighs*
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:12, Reply)

I only know that because Ms Foxtrot loves Masterchef
That said, as we were watching it she had no idea of the answer and when I told her it was down to her she was completely bemused. Blondes, eh
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:14, Reply)

I knew it
but I couldnt think of the answer as quick as you

*doffs cap*
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:10, Reply)

I thank you
Most kind
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:16, Reply)

You have an amazing poker face.
And Charms looked over my shoulder, blinked, and asked who the guy in the Joker outfit was.

Well done.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:48, Reply)

Thank you
The ridiculously serious face was due to high levels of concentration; both trying to make sure I heard the questions correctly and supressing the urge to shit myself
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:53, Reply)

Actually, I found the poker face much better than that simpering fool further round on your left
(from your side I think)

That really fucking pissed me off. You could have smiled when you won, though.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:55, Reply)

Smiling's for cunts.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:57, Reply)

I'll say that next time you loom over me like a giant yokel scarecrow.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:03, Reply)

I am mortally offended. Yokel?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:09, Reply)

ARIIIGHHHHT MY LOVERRRRR

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:20, Reply)

By the time I won I'd answered eight questions and got five of them wrong
It was all I could do not to faint with relief
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:02, Reply)

Congrats dude, saw it last night
You looked very composed and definitely deserved to win it.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:49, Reply)

Cheers mate :-)

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:54, Reply)

Most people thought that I would achieve fuck all but I proved those bastards wrong,
I've done less than fuck all with my life.
( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:18, Reply)

So long as you are happy, that is what counts.
It must be quite hard to maintain such a low standard though.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:27, Reply)

My life is a constant struggle
I'm out there living this shit 24/7.
( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:27, Reply)

happy birthday mate.
how're you?
(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:19, Reply)

I'm fine thanks, my natural state is "being a bit miserable."

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:28, Reply)

a bit miserable?
I think this is the first year I won't enjoy my birthday either - it's on monday.
(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:36, Reply)

Birthday greetings to you.
You have achieved seeing Jerry Lee Lewis, Bo Diddley, Chuck Berry and Little Richard in one day. I'd have been content to die the next morning, personally.

Only yesterday I was saying how '87 to about '93 were incredible years for me. When I had to start working it was petty much all over. With some notable exceptions my life's been a hideous and miserable grind ever since.

My life is AMAZING. Did I ever tell you about my Pink Floyd tribute band, 'The Division Bellends'? Or my sexy not-at-all-exactly-the-same-as-a-medieval-witch missus, or my prodigious swimming ability...?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:26, Reply)

That's more like it!
I'm green with envy.
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:33, Reply)

I was only saying last night, to some SEXY STRIPPERS IN A STRIP CLUB
how some people talk about it but I live it - 24/7. I'm a playa, yo. I AM IN NO WAY HAVING A MID-LIFE CRISIS, OK?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:37, Reply)

2 kl 4 skool

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:42, Reply)

Thanks old bean.
I'm getting to the age where just being alive is an achievment.

Good news that ambulances are being reinforced, to make them suitable for getting me to the coronary unit.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:38, Reply)

I'd like to think I've made a new beginning in my life, and that things will get better from here.
Last year was fucking miserable for me, but I'm on the way to sorting it out.

If I had to pick the best point of my life so far, it'd likely be September 2007-March 2008. That was when my best mate and I first got a house together. That was fucking superb.

No Alt? How very dare you, Sir.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:38, Reply)

Happy Birthday Bartleby!
I feel I'm reaching the pinnacle of the rollercoaster ride, seeing as I hit the big 30 this year...
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:41, Reply)

UR Ronan Keating AICMFP

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:43, Reply)

He R old AICMFP, possibly
Ronan Keating he R not.
(berk, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:47, Reply)

Fuck you very much

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:49, Reply)

I'd have thought you'd have learned, after your SHOCK AFFAIR REVELATIONS.
Keep it in your emerald velvet knickerbockers, you potato-farming simpleton.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:51, Reply)

I like this a lot

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:06, Reply)

Or B*Witched.

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:51, Reply)

I'm not sure I get this

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:51, Reply)

With those chins, I'm not surprised.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:52, Reply)

What's the matter, too fat for your jeggings?
Take your end-life crisis and do one, eh?
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:58, Reply)

They did a song called Rollercoaster.
Or quite possibly Rollercoaster of Love.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:53, Reply)

And you couldn't have picked the Red Hot Chili Peppers version?

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:55, Reply)

SOME PEPEL SAY I LOOK LOIKE ME DAD

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:55, Reply)

hahaha

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:09, Reply)

FOIGHT LOIKE ME DA AZWELL
the twins are attempting a comeback by the way, you have been warned
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:27, Reply)

Yeah, I saw, dressed as Barbarella, hilarious times

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:29, Reply)

the B*witched cd with Rollercoaster on it was the first cd I ever bought.
I was like, 7 years old.
(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:55, Reply)

Don't be too down about it.
C'est la vie.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:57, Reply)

Just blame it on the Weatherman.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:00, Reply)

My ex-boss and I had to do a "Giving Presentations" type course and to bring in something to present about
He picked up a book at random from the bookcase in his house and had to do a heartfelt presentation about B*Witched as his daughter had left her annual on there. It was quite entertaining
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:09, Reply)

The Chili Peppers Rollercoaster is shit
and I like them
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:08, Reply)

I remember them 'performing' this on TOTP
www.youtube.com/watch?v=-UcRM6M792Q
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:53, Reply)

Being 30 was pretty great.
Loads of Money, loads of energy, few responsibilities.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:57, Reply)

Loads of sex.

( girlinthehole, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:03, Reply)

I'm a bit tired,
but go on then
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:09, Reply)

Pfft! don't force yourself on my account.

( girlinthehole, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:12, Reply)

I'd like to force myself on your 'account'.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:12, Reply)

It's little posts like this that make my day a bit brighter.

( girlinthehole, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:22, Reply)

*forces*

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:13, Reply)

*lies back and thinks of England*

( girlinthehole, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:23, Reply)

*splooges*
*apologises to rhubarb on dresser drawer*
*falls asleep*
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:24, Reply)

ac o
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:14, Reply)

Happy birthday mate
in terms of fun and happiness, I peaked years ago. However in terms of work and getting stuff done and things, I'm going to continue (trying) to kick the shit out of life until I can't get away with it any more. Hopefully this will result in both a career and fun, but I'm aware it probably won't.
(berk, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:46, Reply)

Happy birthday bbz.
I have come to the conclusion I will achieve nothing with my life. I only wish to enrich the lives of those around me with my sparkling wit and enthusiasm for EVERYTHING.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:50, Reply)

Happy birthday young man.
Fuck knows where I am in life. They now say 50 is the new 40. By the time I get to 50 it will be 60.
( girlinthehole, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:53, Reply)

No love, that's the retirement age
and by the time you reach it it'll be 93 or something equally ridiculous.
(berk, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 8:58, Reply)

I better keep fit then : (

( girlinthehole, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:03, Reply)

HAPPY BARTDAY!

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:11, Reply)

I've got to the point in life where things are good
I have a lovely wife, two great kids, a house, car, decent job, etc. I just need a bit more time to do stuff and things will be champion. If my rollercoaster is going down its doing it slowly I suppose

/croissant
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:15, Reply)

I don't want to hear this.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:26, Reply)

Why not??

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:28, Reply)

it reminds me of my lack of progress

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:30, Reply)

If Progress is
never getting any sleep and a large mortgage then PROGRESS I have made
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:31, Reply)

But you've forgotten to mention that you're also a fucking bender.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:36, Reply)

I think you will find
that YOU were the one that fucked ME!..... oh hang on.....
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:38, Reply)

Actually, if life is going to be a rollercoaster
Can it be this one?

Fuck it, I'd rather have fun, than go on another shitty, boring one
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:21, Reply)

HAPPY BUFFDEE BART
I reckon there's more good to come for me, but not in the way I used to.
I'm actually quite content, where I used to be a bit "Something's got to change, but I don't know what."
So that's nice.

Have a grrrreat day our Bart.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 9:54, Reply)

Happy Birthday to the both of you!
Whenever I say my age, I always get the response "Only 21? Awww!"

Mainly because I have one of those personalities which enables me to get along better with people a bit older than me rather than people younger than me (including my other half, who is nine years my senior), so I tend to get very slightly patronising responses. Even my friends that were born in the same year are at least a few months older than me.

I don't mind, because a lot of my friends then follow their slightly patronising comments up with a sulky "Wish I was 21 again."
(theneet began to cut her hair and long for balls, Thu 3 Feb 2011, 11:24, Reply)