Wha'gwan?
Apparently if Bon Jovi get mentioned on B3ta too many times it breaks.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:15, 74 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

I had a fry up for lunch
why am I hungry already?
(PsychoChomp, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:16, Reply)

I had pie
steak pie. It was fucking lovely
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:17, Reply)

Because you are a fat, greedy little cunt?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:17, Reply)

This is the correct answer.

(PsychoChomp, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:20, Reply)

fucking hell Tunisa is the place to go on holiday at the moment.

(PsychoChomp, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:24, Reply)

You should check out prices in Egypt too

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:30, Reply)

It's a good time to go
prices are rock bottom and it's not full of cunts. As long as you stay away from Cairo you'll be fine. Sharm must be fucking brilliant right now.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:35, Reply)

Yeah I've had a look, Sharm isn't that much cheaper.
It's probably the sort of place you can get excellent last minute deals to though.
(PsychoChomp, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:40, Reply)

I saw a friend last night who lives there.
She said now is the time to go.

A combination of unrest elsewhere and shark attacks scaring people off means there's no cunt there.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:40, Reply)

Still looking like £350 ish for 7 days
while tunisia is £110
(PsychoChomp, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:45, Reply)

Tunisia is a bit shit

(Bazongaloid, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:48, Reply)

I was brought up on camping holidays on the north coast of France.
I'll have a good time.
(PsychoChomp, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:50, Reply)

Oh wow! Me Too!
I'm amazed I didn't grow up to be a creepy rapist too.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:51, Reply)

I think that was unnecessary.

(PsychoChomp, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:52, Reply)

I find your raping unnecessary

(Bazongaloid, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:55, Reply)

is any rape actually "necessary" ?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 17:02, Reply)

'African punishment bummings' are.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 17:07, Reply)

Are you ABC Monty?
I think you'll find you are.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 17:10, Reply)

we could replicate them with an aubergine

( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 17:11, Reply)

my husband said it was literally the shittiest shithole on the planet
My grandma loved it, but she was 75 and it was about 20 years ago.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:54, Reply)

Husband?
Is there something you're not telling us, swipes?
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:55, Reply)

i've been busy!

( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:58, Reply)

I could have sworn it was just the third or fourth date the other day
You work quickly.
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:59, Reply)

if it's right, it's right crow
Why piss around, eh?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 17:06, Reply)

You're clearly a very decisive character.
Which is a quality I envy. I think.
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 17:12, Reply)

let me guess
You'd also give your right arm to be ambidextrous?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 17:13, Reply)

Being left-handed, that would be the better of the two options...
But then I might need it later on.
GAH!
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 17:15, Reply)

you might be a left handed brain wrong
But even you can see that two hands are always going to be better than one! Silly crow.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 17:20, Reply)

Oi! There's nowt wrong with left-handedness
It makes us special.
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 17:21, Reply)

my mum was left handed
I'm sure that's why i do all sorts of things like shoelaces and ties the wrong way, because she taught me.

Then again i give handjobs with my left hand and she sure as fuck didn't teach me THAT (we're not welsh)
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 17:24, Reply)

It's not the "wrong way round"
It just happens to be the opposite way to the majority of the population.

(Your shoelaces, that is, I don't know what the concensus is for man-milking.)
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 17:28, Reply)

Isn't there a curfew?:
This curfew has seen the cancellation of the nightboat to Cairo.

Madness I tells ya. Madness.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:46, Reply)

L

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:47, Reply)

Ha

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:48, Reply)

Ho

(Bazongaloid, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:51, Reply)

T

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:47, Reply)

Ha

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:49, Reply)

Ho

(Bazongaloid, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:51, Reply)

I

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:47, Reply)

Ha!

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:49, Reply)

Ho

(Bazongaloid, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:51, Reply)

A friend of mine has gone to Sharm with her Mum
She's having a great time.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:40, Reply)

I've got a mate who's just arrived,
I'm sure she'll love it.
(PsychoChomp, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:51, Reply)

Shhh - don't tell Al.
He'll be over there like a shot, dressed as Rastamouse.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:52, Reply)

some form of stomach parasite

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:18, Reply)

Leave him alone! Chompy's alright.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:20, Reply)

You are Rasta Mouse
AICMFP
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:17, Reply)

I saw this on the kid's tv channels last week!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:17, Reply)

It's fucking great.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:18, Reply)

I will watch it
if I can get the kids past Peppa fucking Pig and Ben and Holly. They need to watch Transformers or something. Scooby Doo at the minimum
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:20, Reply)

Raggy?
Raahhgeee.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:21, Reply)

Rowkay

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:23, Reply)

I'm now imagining a blaxploitation version of Scooby Doo with heavily stoned scooby saying "ragga"

( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:24, Reply)

Why on earth are you imagining that?
Are you ill?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:42, Reply)

I'd rather play wow

(PsychoChomp, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:21, Reply)

play wow rape cats
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:38, Reply)

That's disgusting ^.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:55, Reply)

When I try to look at the previous thread
I get a 'database is too busy' message.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:22, Reply)

Too busy rocking out

( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:23, Reply)

Darth is F5ing hard thinking of some scathing comebacks.

(PsychoChomp, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:25, Reply)

"Let's make a bad ting goooood"
and "Why ar dem lickle orphans dressed as pirates??"
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:26, Reply)

If I knew someone who was getting married
and I had an invite to the wedding I would totally go as Rastamouse.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:33, Reply)

If I was getting married,
and I was inviting you, I would love you to turn up as Rastamouse.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:45, Reply)

If I was getting married
and I invited Al and he came as Rastamouse, I too, would love it, because I and all my friends would jeer, taunt and spit at him for doing that, for at least five hours until he was a whimpering, sobbing foetal ball on the floor, stinking of the poos and wees of fear he had excreted during his ordeal.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:50, Reply)

Bunch of nasty cunts

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:52, Reply)

Firm but fair, I'd say.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:53, Reply)

That would definitely make for the most exciting wedding I'd ever been to
_{(Were I invited, obviously - I'm not expecting the "no benders" rule to be lifted for the occasion...)}
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:53, Reply)

You always manage to turn the subject to 'lifting', don't you?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 16:55, Reply)

Of course - it's a positive sort of word
It gives the impression that I'm raising the tone, whereas I am, in fact, slyly elevating your shirt...
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 17:03, Reply)

You should get a job in the Charles Tyrrwhit warehouse.
Getting paid to lift shirts all day would surely be a dream job for you.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 17:08, Reply)

Oh very droll, but not quite
It would be a brief flurry of excitement as I lifted each shirt, followed swiftly by disappointment as I realised, yet again, there was no rippling mantorso concealed beneath it...
(LongJohnBaldry, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 17:14, Reply)

*stumbles in late*
OH MY GOD IF ONLY E KNEW SOMEONE WHO WAS ENGAGED AL!

*runs out*
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 17:17, Reply)

If only it were true in real life and to facilitate his breaking I got to hit him with socks full of cement and nails.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 10 Feb 2011, 17:17, Reply)