IM LONELY AND NO ONE UNDERSTANDS MY INNER BEAUTY WHY CANT THEY JUST LOVE ME FOR MEEEEEeeeeee
*sob*
(PsychoChomp, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:11, 3 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

I'm so fat I can't get out the front door anymore
Inside I'm so beautiful, why can nobody see this
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:13, Reply)

Well apart from nobody wanting to come round bar the district nurse team and my social worker as the place stinks like shit

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:13, Reply)

Hahahah
Excellent call re Roxanne Shante earlier by the way.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:15, Reply)

Yeah she came up on a random play over the weekend and I ain't heard her in a long time I really rate her

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:22, Reply)

I'd really rape her too.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:24, Reply)

I think I'm done now,
I can't get into the emotistic mindset as well as I used to.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:14, Reply)

What I don't get right, yeah', me and you and rory are single, yeah', but Vipros and Al and DG have chicks.
It's all toppsy-tervy.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:13, Reply)

It certainly isn't fair, Gonz.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:14, Reply)

I just don't get it.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:16, Reply)

And monty of all people, look at him, just look at him. Now look at me, and back to him. If you could tell someone's relationship status just by looks, you'd be wrong on this one.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:17, Reply)

You'll find a nice jewish girl.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:17, Reply)

Yeah but he'll need to be over 40 and independently wealthy to get a decent young one.

(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:50, Reply)

My current problem is I don't live in london,
and either I or my friends have slept with pretty much everyone in Milton Keynes who can string two words together and is within the XKCD age bracket.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:16, Reply)

By that I mean my friends.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:16, Reply)

What's the XKCD age bracket?.... half your age plus 7 / double your age minus 7?
I reckon the three of us should go out on the pull, do a "Lads vs girls" night, where we get bladdered on fishbowl cocktails, sing songs about football teams, get into fights... bar crewl. And the girls do whatever they do on a bar crewl... and then we all meet up in a nightclub at the end of it and have competitions "boys vs girls" and all that, see who can down a pint the fastest and all that.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:20, Reply)

Much as I love you gonz, that sounds fucking shit.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:21, Reply)

True story, that's how I lost my virginaty.
To a girl who was so fat that you couldn't see the straps on her sandals because the flab rolled down.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:24, Reply)

:0

(PsychoChomp, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:25, Reply)

There could be a breakdance battle
except everyone's a fucking flid
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:25, Reply)

surely that would be a reason
for a breakdance battle
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:26, Reply)

Excuse me?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:27, Reply)

people dancing crapply and ineptly
would be more entertaining than people actually doing it well, surely. Plus, more chance of hilarious accidents
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:29, Reply)

My pal Aroe broke his neck doing a headspin.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:43, Reply)

It'd be more embarrassing than Pistons stand up video
Shock sites would spring up overnight portraying the terrible results
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:29, Reply)

I would give all my worldly possessions to witness a B3ta b-boy battle.
I cannot stop laughing at this idea.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:27, Reply)

Fat people rolling aimlessly around on the floor
How could you score that??
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:30, Reply)

Last one to have an Asthma attack.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:40, Reply)

Oh great, I don't think I would get more than £5 if I sold your 'I heart jawkwind' shirt that has been warn every day since 1978.
I can learn big fish little fish of it would get me a night with your misses though.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:36, Reply)

Can you break, Monts?
We'll need a referee
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:47, Reply)

I can.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 14:12, Reply)

Right, let's make it happen
I'm throwing down. Oh yes.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 14:14, Reply)

I fucking love breaking.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 14:17, Reply)

Fucking difficult, isn't it
Which is to say that I've given it a go and am far from capable, but would be well up for another tilt.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 14:18, Reply)

I'm all covered in dust here on this shelf

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:16, Reply)

My shelf is so high there is no dust due to lack of atmosphere.

( girlinthehole, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:20, Reply)

Forever alone

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:26, Reply)

Well not forever because I'll be dead soon.

( girlinthehole, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:29, Reply)

Are you on those sites looking for a suicide partner?
BGB SEEK HELP
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:32, Reply)

I'm going out slowly and disgracefully.
Loud, proud and incontinant.
( girlinthehole, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:34, Reply)

Use 1000 gauge sheeting

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:37, Reply)

I'll take that on board Rory.

( girlinthehole, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:42, Reply)

Try being someone else.
It might work better for you.
( girlinthehole, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 13:13, Reply)