Fear of violence.
I would instal a brutal secret police and instil a richly-deserved sense of paranoia through public execution of miscreants etc. I would siphon off vast sums from day one and have a ten-year get out plan, by which time I'd have enough for a new identity and a life spent on the Grand Tour. These idiots always hang about too long - I do not understand the lust for power. Power seems to be rather a burden, to me.

Alt: beans on fucking toast. Woo.

Alt: Hummous is fucking great. It's not bent at all.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:17, 2 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

What sort of beans?

( Bazongaloid, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:19, Reply)

Mr

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:20, Reply)

Please die.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:22, Reply)

I rescued B3ta from the nerds
with their computer games marathons in the dark, only emerging from the computer for MOAR PIZZA
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:24, Reply)

and you honestly think this is better?
jesus christ
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:25, Reply)

Actually it is, marginally.
Much as I love reports of tricky computer games at least this one requires some creativity on behalf of those replying.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:26, Reply)

Much
i could not give a flying fuck about how many 'bad guys' some fat cunt shut in has 'fragged' whilst being racially abused by a 12 year old from Japan.
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:26, Reply)

This might be POTD.
But then, this 'D' is a fucking poor one.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:32, Reply)

it must be if that shithead is getting close to POTD

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:34, Reply)

HARD TIMES, Vippers.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:39, Reply)

too right

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:41, Reply)

Are your scabs making you cranky?
Where is the love man?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:45, Reply)

I'll take that
WHOOP!
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:34, Reply)

I don't think asking is enough
we need to make this happen. Then there will be less threads like this turgid piece of crap.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:25, Reply)

Heinz spicy ones with meatballs. Well bent.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:22, Reply)

You should get yourself one of those "All Day Breakfasts" in a can
comes with little bits of scrambled eggs, sausages and bacon in the beans.

I used to make my own using posh ingredients until I got too fat to leave the house.
( Bazongaloid, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:23, Reply)

That sounds actually revolting
has anyone ever eaten one of those?
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:27, Reply)

they ming
all they do is add horrible mush and chewy bits to the beans that makes the beans taste less good
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:28, Reply)

Making your own is nice though
you can use proper meaty sausages and nice crispy bacon, the egg doesn't really work through, so you can leave that out.
( Bazongaloid, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:29, Reply)

that does sound quite nice
I like to fry up some bits of chorizo and then add beans and heat up. That's good eating.

I wonder if I have any chorizo....
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:30, Reply)

I think it's in the pocket of your waterproof trousers

( Bazongaloid, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:31, Reply)

but my waterpoof trousers just have holes so you can get to the pockets of the trousers you are wearing underneath....

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:32, Reply)

get to the ... wank
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:33, Reply)

nothing like a hillwalking dangerwank.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:38, Reply)

I nommed a load last night in a tomato sauce with cannelini beans
I also have more in the fridge as slices. Always have chorizo!
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:31, Reply)

al would eat them cold from the tin at 4 in the morning when his 7 computer game epic was in a delicate
stage and he couldn't leave the 'bean bag' in case he lost control of his 'base', and by 'bean bag' I mean arse
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:29, Reply)

I used to always have one in for hangover sunday mornings
but now I just cook actual sausage and bacon and fried egg and beans, it's so much better.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:30, Reply)

This^
As emergency mega hangover gear it is fine
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:30, Reply)

There are occasions when anything more complicated is impossible

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:34, Reply)

Indeed
2 mins in the microwave - ding!
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:39, Reply)

I live less than a minute away from a good greasy spoon.
Fuck cooking and clearing up my hangover breaskfast. Also to buy eggs, bacon, mushrooms, tomatoes, bread, beans and black pudding would cost about fifteen fucking quid. It's better quality but if you're hanging, a £5 spent round the corner seems OK to me.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:45, Reply)

I'd have to put trousers on to go to a greasy spoon though
there are a couple within walking distance where I am now, so it might be worthwhile.

I do have sausage, bacon, black pudding, eggs and mushrooms in the house currently.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:49, Reply)

I'll be round in an hour.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:50, Reply)

I'd rather put trousers on than stand over a stove and load a dishwasher when I am hung over.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:51, Reply)

In hindsight, this question was designed for you.

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 30 Aug 2011, 13:20, Reply)