Another one
A 6'6" all-glass door missed my head by about 1/2 an inch on its way to taking an inch deep chunk out of the table right next to my hand. I instinctively caught it but had it hit me, I'd be dead or without fingers.
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 16 Nov 2011, 14:12, 2 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

God's way of warning you to stop touching yourself.

(LongJohnBaldry, Wed 16 Nov 2011, 14:13, Reply)

...in the server room

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 16 Nov 2011, 14:14, Reply)

The server room is obviously making you think dirty thoughts
"Server" is only a short leap phonetically from "cervix," after all...
(LongJohnBaldry, Wed 16 Nov 2011, 14:15, Reply)

It was a saucy desk too
Octagonal bitch
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 16 Nov 2011, 14:15, Reply)

It must have been like making love to an amputee octopus.

(LongJohnBaldry, Wed 16 Nov 2011, 14:28, Reply)

It was
Errm, I mean, maybe......errr..... you'd know!

*points*
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 16 Nov 2011, 14:29, Reply)

sexiest of all female internal organs

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 16 Nov 2011, 14:15, Reply)

Except mine.

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 16 Nov 2011, 14:26, Reply)

I like to sit in church thinking about it
Your womb with a pew, if you will
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 16 Nov 2011, 14:30, Reply)

Other than a weak pun I have no clue what you are banging on about.
Stop spoiling my excellent joke.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 16 Nov 2011, 14:31, Reply)

So your life is like one of those final destinations films.

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 16 Nov 2011, 14:16, Reply)

Tedious?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 16 Nov 2011, 14:17, Reply)

This^

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 16 Nov 2011, 14:20, Reply)

yeah, just as he was thinking how lucky he was a dinosaur bit his cock off and he bled to death
with blood pooling an flowing downhill towards character X who is juggling AIDS patients whilst fisting himself, hilarity ensues
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 16 Nov 2011, 14:17, Reply)

I've told that dinosaur to take his teeth out first

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 16 Nov 2011, 14:19, Reply)

Sort of, but without the death bit

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 16 Nov 2011, 14:19, Reply)

I wonder what the death scene will be.

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 16 Nov 2011, 14:21, Reply)

see above, maybe add a nail gun as well

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 16 Nov 2011, 14:21, Reply)

Everyone knows that dinosaurs are between two and four times more terrifying when armed with nailguns.

(LongJohnBaldry, Wed 16 Nov 2011, 14:22, Reply)

the multiplication of fear being dependent on the usefullness of their arms

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 16 Nov 2011, 14:24, Reply)

Little arms, big nails
Like a thalidomide crackwhore
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 16 Nov 2011, 14:26, Reply)

Exactly. Tyrannosaurus Rex is only twice as terrifying when armed with a nailgun,
because, although initially this means he may be able to fire nails in your direction, his inadequate, Deaconesque forearms will leave him incapable of reloading the thing after you have avoided his first salvo. You may then breathe a sigh of relief before he realises he's better off charging after you and biting your cock off.
(LongJohnBaldry, Wed 16 Nov 2011, 14:27, Reply)

What if the nailgun is mounted on his head and fired by a smaller dino with better reach?

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 16 Nov 2011, 14:31, Reply)

now you're being silly

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 16 Nov 2011, 14:32, Reply)

see below you freakin nark.

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 16 Nov 2011, 14:33, Reply)

Dino-Master-Blaster

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Wed 16 Nov 2011, 14:32, Reply)

YES!

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 16 Nov 2011, 14:32, Reply)

Well, it's stretching the definitions a bit, seeing as we're now incorporating two dinosaurs,
but I suspect, say, a coelophysis with sufficient training and a sturdy harness, could accomplish this. Your best chance of escape is when they get into close range and start to argue over whose turn it is to bite your cock off.
(LongJohnBaldry, Wed 16 Nov 2011, 14:33, Reply)

Fuck em. I'd use this
www.youtube.com/watch?v=yfk-a1JZMbU

NSFW probably.
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 16 Nov 2011, 14:35, Reply)