Alt alt alt: Meh.
Cheese and biscuits, port and a large breandeh.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:25, 2 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

Can't stand fortified wines
They all taste like alcoholic golden syrup to me.
( Kroney, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:27, Reply)

Educate your tastebuds. Philistine.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:30, Reply)

Shan't.
I don't get on with whisky, either. That's like drinking alcoholic mud. People even say whiskies are "peaty". I don't want to drink Irish bog mud, thanks.
( Kroney, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:31, Reply)

I bet you're one of those people who claim they can't taste the difference between freshly ground coffee and instant.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:33, Reply)

Or between an attractive lady and a ropey old tranny.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:34, Reply)

Actually I can.
Also wines and proper beer. Whisky, and I have tried to acquire the taste, just tastes like arse.
( Kroney, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:37, Reply)

peaty
Refers to the smokiness, nowt to do with mud.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:43, Reply)

how dare you
generally Irish whiskies aren't peated.
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 9:07, Reply)

As I've grown older my liking for sherry in particular has grown enormously.
From the 80s when my brother and I would pretend to like it so we could blag a free drink from our father on a Sunday morning, to actively seeking it out and paying quite a lot for it. The difference betrween good and shit ones is as marked as that betweem, say, a fine malt and Bell's.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:30, Reply)

From my childhood memories
Sherry is a drink served in the morning at your nana's house, that is apparently acceptable to give to children.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:31, Reply)

My Scots great-grandmother used to offer us 'orange juice'.
It was neat squash.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:33, Reply)

Gotta love the different standards of the older generations
When my sister and I stayed the night at my nana's she would often give us coffee made with boiled milk and whisky before bed.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:36, Reply)

In the morning?
Blimey.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:36, Reply)

Mid-morning, not first thing.
We weren't alcoholics.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:38, Reply)

Really, I'm taking the wrong high horse here, aren't I?

( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:45, Reply)

Moderation is the key.
Which is why I only use heroin sparingly.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:48, Reply)

'Moderation'?
*rolls word around tongue*

*Fetches dictionary*
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:51, Reply)

1st click of the day

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 9:06, Reply)

Buy more expensive wines then, cheapskate.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:30, Reply)

I buy very nice wines. It's Port, sherry, brandy etc I can't get alongside.

( Kroney, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:32, Reply)

You are dead to me.
I have no Kroney.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:32, Reply)

Soz
I like sherry trifle, if that's any help?
( Kroney, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:34, Reply)

Sorry, who are you?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:38, Reply)

Also, wine gums.
They have port and sherry and stuff in them, you know.
( Kroney, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:39, Reply)

I'm Monty, pleased to meet you.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:43, Reply)

You're not pleased.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:44, Reply)

I am rarely pleased by anything.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 9:00, Reply)

Start with a port for about £15.00 let it warm up, and take little sips.
You'll soon be rolling around on the floor fighting the moon.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:39, Reply)

Port is quite nice with lemonade.

( girlinthehole, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:34, Reply)

Tut tut tut.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:35, Reply)

Port is great, you cretin
it's such a shame it makes me so bloody ill.
(berk, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:36, Reply)

You aren't supposed to drink it in pints.
As I remember the next day, every time.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:37, Reply)

The first time it was my own fault for drinking several jugs of cheeky vimto
the second time it was just my fault for drinking it at all when I'd established the effect it has on me.
(berk, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:39, Reply)

And what effect is that?

( Kroney, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:41, Reply)

It drives her to rape and pillage her way through spa towns

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:44, Reply)

That's handy, I'm off to Bath this weekend, maybe I'll get lucky.

( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:45, Reply)

I was hoping for projectile vomiting, I would have slipped it to her at the next bash if that were the case.
I'm not sure i want to be responsible for a pillaging, though.
( Kroney, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:46, Reply)

You're ok with rape though?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:47, Reply)

Isn't everyone?

( Kroney, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:48, Reply)

9 out of 10 etc.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:56, Reply)

It gets me hilariously drunk very quickly
and gives me a three-day hangover.
(berk, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 9:41, Reply)

Cretin?
How very bloody dare you.
( Kroney, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 8:38, Reply)

Port is rather lovely, I've been shitfaced after drinking it more than once

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 9:01, Reply)

Port is superb
It is one of the greatest drunk feelings ever,
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 7 Dec 2011, 10:55, Reply)