Alt: you mean the left-wing William Hague?
Labour's sacrificial lamb until someone half-decent comes along to try and win in 2016 or whenever
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 10 Jan 2012, 8:49, 2 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

I think Al should put himself forward
he's twice the man Ed is
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 10 Jan 2012, 8:50, Reply)

Or, indeed, James Corden

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 10 Jan 2012, 8:52, Reply)

Fuck this democracy lark.
DICTATORSHIP NOW!
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Tue 10 Jan 2012, 8:53, Reply)

woohoo!
*burns books*
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 10 Jan 2012, 8:54, Reply)

books kindles
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 10 Jan 2012, 8:56, Reply)

And I suppose you'd like to be our dictator?
Well I for one welcome our new scotch-drinking, haggis-eating, kilt-wearing, caber-tossing, fight-starting, language-mangling, sporran-sporting, sassenach-hating, tight-fisted, Mars bar-frying, stereotype-defying overlord
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 10 Jan 2012, 8:57, Reply)

Nicely done

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 10 Jan 2012, 9:08, Reply)

Cheers
How you keeping mate?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 10 Jan 2012, 9:09, Reply)

The sportsback is once again causing issues but apart from that, quite good
The patented "stop eating your own bodyweight in cake and lager" diet seems to be working too. 4lbs down in 6 days
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 10 Jan 2012, 9:13, Reply)

Congrats mate
I started my diet very well but it appears a weekend in Blackpool has kippered my earlier efforts. Back on the treadmill tonight.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 10 Jan 2012, 9:15, Reply)

No exercise at all as yet
Was giving it two weeks of sensible eating so I've less cow to carry round
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 10 Jan 2012, 9:16, Reply)

Not a bad plan that
Unfortunately my metabolism doesn't burn it fast enough and I'm impatient
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 10 Jan 2012, 9:18, Reply)

Mine appears to run very quickly
Woop!
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 10 Jan 2012, 9:21, Reply)

Good for you
*fetches cow-gun*
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 10 Jan 2012, 9:23, Reply)

haha

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 10 Jan 2012, 9:24, Reply)

bollocks.
Everyone burns calories at the same rate, what with it being a basic and fundamental fucking energy balance. Man the fuck up, Foxtrot. "metabolism" and "glands" are simply limp-wristed excuses for "I can't stop myself inhaling cake"
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 10 Jan 2012, 9:49, Reply)

McHOOTS MON!
I AM GRAND MUFTI McSPORRAN THE WISE
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Tue 10 Jan 2012, 9:10, Reply)

"Wise"?
And you were doing so well
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 10 Jan 2012, 9:12, Reply)

Meh. Fucking teuchter.


disclaimer - since I don't actually know where up here Mumpers is from, this might be an off-target piece of abuse, but fuck it.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 10 Jan 2012, 9:47, Reply)

I believe he's from 'The Weedge' m'lud.

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 10 Jan 2012, 10:19, Reply)

arrrrgh. A Weedge?
KILL IT.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 10 Jan 2012, 10:24, Reply)