I've never been hit by, or hit on by, an old person.
Shit question, Quendtin.

My kid got a place at our second choice of primary school, and is on the waiting list for our first choice.

That's excellent news for me - and about as interesting to you as some grotty old tart's television signal, I should imagine.

As you were, internetters.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 11:12, 3 replies, latest was 13 years ago)

Just a couple of hit and run accidents from first choice!

(PsychoChomp, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 11:13, Reply)

Monty can't drive, so no dice there.

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Thu 19 Apr 2012, 11:14, Reply)

+ furry

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 11:16, Reply)

Watch out on the news for a mysterious spate of gas-related domestic explosions in Shoreditch.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 11:19, Reply)

i told you to fix that oven...

( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 11:20, Reply)

Hahaha

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 11:22, Reply)

Like you can afford gas

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 11:23, Reply)

going to Needoos?

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 11:40, Reply)

Where is she going?

(Bazongaloid, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 11:14, Reply)

Virginia School in Arnold Circus, Shoreditch.
Chock full of brownies, but what can you do?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 11:16, Reply)

Stop being racist?

(PsychoChomp, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 11:18, Reply)

I'm trying to get Al to have a right-on fit and you are not helping.
Shush, will you?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 11:20, Reply)

Surely small Girl Guides are not a separate race?

(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Thu 19 Apr 2012, 11:20, Reply)

'Low that bruv, she's gonna be gassin' bare road talk in no time.

(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 11:18, Reply)

Not if she likes pocket money and food, she fucking won't.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 11:20, Reply)

i thought the only reason to have kids
was that they had to provide you with both of the above?

i need to have words with my dad if it's meant to be this way round.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 11:22, Reply)

Northern dad lolz

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 11:23, Reply)

"grotty old tart" LOLS
i have to go and explain a basic legal principle to some non-legal types shortly. i may struggle to be polite.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 11:20, Reply)

One "client" of mine, as I have to call them, took 2 weeks to learn how to use a mouse. Another gets confused between her email user name, and her password.
She also forgets her password on a regular basis, even though it's her name and her date of birth. I struggle to be polite sometimes.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Thu 19 Apr 2012, 11:23, Reply)

niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiice
tell her to hang herself with the mouse cable

like that dopey dog that hanged itself with the phone but managed to call 999 by mistake
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 11:24, Reply)

Is that a real story?
If so, the mutt sounds quite canny.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Thu 19 Apr 2012, 11:26, Reply)