Yay
Pay review time.....

This year I will be getting... fuck all
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:23, 5 replies, latest was 14 years ago)

And taht's more than you're worth.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:24, Reply)

taht is correct didneed

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:27, Reply)

bad luck sporters
*sets up "Sporters Relief"*
*Makes David Walliams swim the fucking Atlantic*
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:24, Reply)

I like the David Walliams idea

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:26, Reply)

I meant to add that he would be wearing a"meat suit"

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:27, Reply)

I'd pay money to see him swim that bit off the coast of SA
in between the mainland and some seal island. In a black wetsuit.

The one which is fucking teeming with seal-hungry great whites.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:27, Reply)

do you actually mean "fuck all"
or do you mean "same as last year"

...cos if it's the former, you need to look long and hard at your negotiation skills, sporters.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:25, Reply)

I mean fuck all, as in nothing
My negotiating skills are now being brought out as we don't get any input until now
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:27, Reply)

Oh, sorry. I meant nothing as in "no salary" not "no raise"
I should probably clarify that to make my initial post be taken in the comedy vein it was intended, really.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:29, Reply)

Ahhh, "almost" nothing then

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:30, Reply)

comedy gold

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:31, Reply)

I know, I'm on fire here Quints.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:31, Reply)

Fire eh?
*thinks up new plan for pay review*
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:34, Reply)

oh shit why are you on the internet? SOMEBODY PHONE A FIRE MAN

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:34, Reply)

sorry
i'll stop gazzing you titshots now.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:36, Reply)

At this point, I'd like to point out I'm freezing

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:36, Reply)

i've just run out of titshots
i have a few b3tan's cockshots from the last few years, can i interest you in those?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:38, Reply)

*deflates*

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:40, Reply)

define "a few"
cos I'm intrigued how many people would be idiotic enough to gaz a picture of their cock to someone?
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:41, Reply)

more than enough
that is how many!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:43, Reply)

Speaking as a non cock-gazzer
How would you even do it? Gaz is text innit?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:44, Reply)

ascii.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:44, Reply)

8=======D

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:15, Reply)

Doesn't work too well, but you get the idea...
======
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:17, Reply)

host a picture somewhere
email the link

at least, that's what your dad did
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:03, Reply)

Like my Dad could work a computer

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:16, Reply)

woah.
let's not get carried away, here.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:39, Reply)

Bob Marley less successful...

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:35, Reply)

haha. That's one of the better ones of this meme.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:36, Reply)

yes, i thought this deserved MOAR attention

( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:39, Reply)

Surely you can argue for inflation?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:26, Reply)

To say I am slightly annoyed is a slight understatement

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:28, Reply)

I wpon't be gettinig the promotion I wanted
as my manager has only been with me for six months and needs "more data points", fuck off, I did that before you arrived
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:29, Reply)

The real reason is that you're a shitcunt
with nothing to offer the workplace.

And you spend too much time on the internet.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:32, Reply)

I can't argue with the second point
however still overperform, hit targets etc etc
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:33, Reply)

You are:
Jim Carrey
Robin Hood
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:41, Reply)

mr kettle, I've got a mr pot on line one..

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:34, Reply)

no-one else is really getting it.
Our inflation increase was 0.3% for 2 years. And much as I dislike them we've got a few fairly powerful unions doing our negotiation.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:28, Reply)

I got 5% last year...
but I am awesome
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:29, Reply)

i think this year i'll be earning a few grand more than last year
thats always nice
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:30, Reply)

5% for inflation?
or 5% for being awesome?
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:30, Reply)

"pay adjustment" they call it

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:31, Reply)

ah, right.
ours completely separates inflationary pay rises, statuatory progression and performance related stuff. About the only thing here that is transparent...
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:33, Reply)

% stars on my McBadge
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:30, Reply)

*claims free cheese burger*

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:32, Reply)

GUTTED
just say you're deeply disappointed in the result and even though you know it's a difficult time the effect of inflation means this pay deal is a real terms wage cut of 3.5%
(PsychoChomp, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:34, Reply)

In the last 4 years, I have had one pay rise
last year. In real terms, I'd appreciate what this would mean.
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:36, Reply)

It means they think you're shit

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:38, Reply)

I thought this
15 fucking years (almost) I've been here. My rage is growing.
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:39, Reply)

You're underappreciated, a fixture if you will
By not having moved on years ago you've been marked as lacking in ambition or wit. You're the office mug, suck it up
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 15:43, Reply)