also this will make you laugh
posted some pics on fb of my friend's hen-do.

provoked a fair number of sweaty-handed mails and texts about my fit mates.

ALL from b3tans. sigh.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 10:31, 4 replies, latest was 13 years ago)

*one* fit mate.
One.
( Kroney, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 10:34, Reply)

you were the very first sweaty-handed prick
you should be ashamed
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 10:34, Reply)

Hey, I'm foot-loose and fancy free
Doesn't hurt to ask.
( Kroney, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 10:35, Reply)

Ahh, I wondered which b3tan it was that said that.

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 10:49, Reply)

Really? I mean, I don't mean to be rude about your friends, but they really are average at best.
I'm not saying any of them would get turned down if the chance arose, but seriously, people on this website are fucking creepy.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 10:35, Reply)

Actually I'm going to revise that statement
one of your friends looks a bit like the woman who plays Dexter's sister in the TV series "Dexter". And she's quite fit.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 10:38, Reply)

two of them are really stunning in real life - one of them used to model for topshop etc
the rest are attractive, but not stunning. although they aren't my friends, they are the hen's friends. two of them are lesbians, and the attention they got from men made me lol.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 10:41, Reply)

i do like it when girls say other girls are stunning
cos by men's standards they're just weird looking and well dressed

:/
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 10:45, Reply)

men's "standards"
ie tits and arse.

good standards there.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 10:47, Reply)

naw, it's just taht men have different tastes to women
we like a pretty face and a nice body

women like other girls with really weird faces and skinny bodies in my experience
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 10:47, Reply)

so, models, then
so if i said my top 5 "would like to be" girls were:

kate moss, jennifer aniston, megan fox, andrea corr and jessica biel, how's my taste?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 10:49, Reply)

i don't care how you taste
and don't tell me you've given up on men already :(

its are loss
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 10:50, Reply)

you'll never know
what part of "would like to be" suggests giving up on men?

read english, boy.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 10:52, Reply)

it was the extensive list, you've obviously thought about it too much
and they're all out of your league too :(
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 10:55, Reply)

i gave it as much thought as it took to type it

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 10:57, Reply)

for a serious answer
moss - weird face, skinny body
aniston -weird face, what body?
fox - yeah ok, nobody's arguing with fox, fox does ok
andrea corr - she was good in like 1999
jessica biel - she's been alright
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 11:04, Reply)

Other body parts are occasionally taken into consideration.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 10:48, Reply)

They all look like munters.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 10:45, Reply)

YOUR FACE looks like a munter

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 10:46, Reply)

Model for Topshop?
Blimey, I bet she got a gig for Woolworths too.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Mon 2 Jul 2012, 10:47, Reply)

At least she has a job

(Bazongaloid, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 10:48, Reply)

Well, I'm still self-employed,
so am ok. Thanks for your concern though.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Mon 2 Jul 2012, 10:51, Reply)

yeah, she was the Bag4life

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 10:48, Reply)

Creepy's coming it a bit high, isn't it?
I don't really see the difference between seeing a friend of a friend in a bar and saying "who's your mate?" and seeing a photo of that friend and saying "who's your mate?"
( Kroney, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 10:54, Reply)

In the bar she can see what you are doing with your hands.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 10:58, Reply)

I feel I've let you down here
in my failure to sweaty-hand over them in any way. Can you forgive me?
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 10:49, Reply)

because i know you were just too busy perving over me
then it's ok, sweetheart
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 10:49, Reply)

well, obviously.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 10:50, Reply)

in other news, how's the wrist?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 10:52, Reply)

yeah, it's getting there.
Don't suppose it's ever going to be 100% but I can do most things reasonably again.

Lost all definition in my left arm though, it just looks like I've been involved in a ten-year right handed powerwank. Sad times, swipe.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 10:55, Reply)

i am laughing at the image
but it is rich with sympathy
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 10:58, Reply)

A 10 year right hand power wank sounds wrong.
Obviously, masturbation is left ahnded.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Mon 2 Jul 2012, 11:00, Reply)

I didn't fancy any of your mates
But the homo inside me thought £380 for that?
( Peej, Mon 2 Jul 2012, 11:31, Reply)