the best of the lot
is the toolrag doctor (no, not edmund) who started chatting me up. then his sister got hit by a drunk driver and was in a coma. lots of emails/messages flew around. before something made me suspicious.

bit of internet sleuthing later...... he was a mobile phone salesman. with a fiancee. who never had a sister. he turned up at my office to meet one of my friends with a big bunch of flowers. on the basis that he was pretending to be his own mate. when my friend queried this, because it was so screamingly obvious he was shifty, he said that his "mate" was a real doctor, honestly, he had delivered the "mate's" baby in a snowstorm by the side of the road....

jesus.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:03, 4 replies, latest was 13 years ago)

Your mate is Mary?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:04, Reply)

OH COME ON.
Leave the Internet.
(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:05, Reply)

mwahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaa!
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:05, Reply)

not my mate
his fictitious fucked-up mate maybe
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:05, Reply)

Joseph?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:05, Reply)

Or little donkey.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:05, Reply)

On a dusty road?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:06, Reply)

*releases heavy load*

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:06, Reply)

I think probably best not to ever meet anyone from the internet

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:05, Reply)

I met most of you lot and I escaped unscathed.

(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:05, Reply)

PTSD can take quite a while to kick in, so don't be complacent yet,

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:10, Reply)

Maybe I have that stockholm syndrome thing, cos I actually miss a fair few of you fuckers.

(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:12, Reply)

I'm sure it's ok to meet some of them
But I don't think you have to have sex with them, which I think is where 'Swipe appears to be going wrong.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:07, Reply)

You don't *have* to, but it can be *fun* to.

(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:08, Reply)

Are you grooming me?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:09, Reply)

As soon as you're aked she'll bully your genitals

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:10, Reply)

Clamp the testicles and tie them up, and then leave them there all day while I go shopping with their credit cards.
I'd say that's a good way to bully genitals.
(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:11, Reply)

yes, having sex with people from a website known for attracting mentally ill people sounds like a right laugh

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:10, Reply)

+ fat
+ sweaty
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:10, Reply)

it wasn't
it was embarrassingly shit
( rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:16, Reply)

She only fucks the gayers. So NA should watch out.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:08, Reply)

this is a statement that I can really get behind

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:07, Reply)

I am, so far, with you on this one

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:11, Reply)

You two should meet up for drinks or something.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:13, Reply)

yeah sure!

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:14, Reply)

TOTALLY

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:16, Reply)

AWESOME _{no way I'm turning up}
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:17, Reply)

What was it that made you suspicious?

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:07, Reply)

The internet, man.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:08, Reply)

When are we going drinking again?

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:09, Reply)

You free Saturday?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:14, Reply)

Gay

( Kroney, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:15, Reply)

Hi, I'm Stunned.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:21, Reply)

Building my shed.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:15, Reply)

I've got a free pass on Sat night.
Not sure after that.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:23, Reply)

I am around in the evening. Will gaz you.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:26, Reply)

Looks like I am :o((((((
Rather do Friday though.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:30, Reply)

Did either of us invite you?
LolJoke.

Friday works a bit better for me too.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:33, Reply)

:'o((((((((

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:34, Reply)

Ohh man.

(Poppet some assembly required., Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:36, Reply)

You great big Mary.
First round is on you.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:37, Reply)

It really is.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:47, Reply)

You said you'd never tell them about that.
massive sadface, online, right here.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 10 Jul 2012, 16:35, Reply)